All comments for Megan 'The Angler' Proverbs

Wow. You got some good stuff here. I really enjoyed Kilmore's Gold. Your poetry talents are amazing. I also loved the prologue. Your writing skills are good as well. Stop by my story page sometime. I have a shadow in my story as well...::grins::

Megan... I truly enjoyed each one of your pieces... especially the prologue. I'm going to your gallery right after this to look at your art, methinks. I'd love for ya to inform me of any updates y'make... large or small!... and y'best make 'em soon. -beams happily.-

Hi Megan :) Yay! Another aussie, and a very talented one too :) I often wander around Elfwood searching for new talent, and I finally found it tonight! I have been deeply inspired by your breathtaking poetry. I cannot wait to read more...I will be back for sure, to read your story and more poetry! More! :p

Wow. Thank you, I am truly honoured! More poetry? Shades, I'd better get writing then!

I don't really know what to say, your poetry is reeeaaaaallllyyy good. Keep posting more!

No worries!

WOW! its late an i know I gotta coment or ill kick myself later! WOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWWWWW! your an amazing wrter! write more!

Very talented. Of course what do you expect from a Tasmanian. LOL, where in Tassie do you live. It would be funny if it was near me.

Yeah, that would sure be a major coincidence! I live on the North-West coast. Am I warm?

WOW! U have such a talent! WHat did yoyu get someone elses share as well?! :-) na i really think you are fantastic at writing. *yawns and llooks at the clock* oh its late gotta go slezzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

I was born in the North West Coast and lived there for 11 years but I moved to Launceston.

I hope you have more here soon. I like reading your novel, or what there is of it so far.

Launceston? Hey, that's pretty close. I'm from Burnie! Thanks for reading my novel. I'm glad you like it.

I really enjoyed Ferrian's Winter. You have a real way with descriptions and the flow was excellent, I found it infinitely readable and look forward to more.

Do you know how much i love Ferrian's Winter?
Well the answer is loads!! I read the updates but i wanted to say congrats on the Mod's Choice you got. I haven't had a chance to read it yet, but i will, i promise. Your work is great, you are very talented :)
I'll be back soon.

  Comment From The Writer: LOL. I kind of guessed! You didn't read my Mod's Choice? *sniff* I'm heartbroken.... no, seriously, *grins* you've left so many wonderful comments that I honestly wouldn't mind if you never read anything of mine ever again (although I hope you will, of course! :) You could not believe how happy I am that you like FW so much. It makes writing so much more worthwhile to know that there are people out there who get as much pleasure from reading it as I get from writing it!

yeah Australia... i'm aussie too...your stories are amazing...i've read all of them i couldn't stop myself they were too good - keep writting

  Comment From The Writer: You do realise if my ego gets any bigger, it's going to be a hazard to the International Space Station....

You're a very talented writer. I've read Ferrian's Winter through Chapter 6, and I'm planning on reading the rest right now. I do hope you consider of publishing this once it's finished, as it is original and *very* good. Keep it up. I'm making a gallery here in Wyvern's soon, myself, and I could only hope people like my writing a fraction as much as we like your's. :)

Aussie, aussie, aussie, oy, oy, oy
good story keep writing

Time stealer!!
Now i have finished the whole of your library, i might just be able to read someone else's! LOL!
However, you may be a time stealer, but it was most definitely not wasted.
Your poetry is gorgeous and your stories are fabulous. I want more!! Go on, i'd even pay for more, lol! *Ego collapses from the shock that the moths would be allowed out of the wallet!* ("However they've only settled in there because there isn't actually any money in it, hence i never use it!")
I heavily applaud your talent. Tis truly wonderful!

Comment From The Writer: *stares in astonishment at flood of comments in her inbox* Holy Crud! Not only did I get you away from FW, I got you to read EVERYTHING! LOL!

You'd PAY me for more? LOL! Well, I can't argue with that!

I love you're writing. I've been reading Ferrian's Winter, but I plan on reading everything here. I love your style.

Comment From The Writer: Oh no, I've got another one hooked, have I? LOL! Thanks so much :)

Oh...Wow!
I've just been to your website and read the latest FW, yeh i know i took my time, but i have been incredibly busy lately.
Anyway...WOW! Chapter 12, that was just wow, i can't believe how good that chapter was. The best so far definitely. Obviously i'm not going to say why here, if people want to know they can read it! I'll wait until it comes up on here to tell you why i loved it.
FW just keeps on getting better!

  Comment From The Writer: Eh heh heh! That chapter shocked yer socks off, didn't it ;) Don't worry, take as much time as you like. I've been pretty busy myself - when I'm not at TAFE or doing homework, every spare inch of time is spent reading the new Harry Potter book (oooooooh!) So all writing projects are on hold until I finish it!

LMAO!
I got that from Amazon at 9am last saturday...i'd finished it by 10pm that saturday lol! And i didn't spend the whole day reading, honest! I just spent most of the day...
But now i want book 6! And i am so not happy!! My favourite Character!! *Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrumbles*
You'll see what i mean *sigh*
And it didn't shock me socks off, i wasn't wearing any...but it did have a static effect on my hair! I can't believe you did that!! But i guess all will be revealed eventually! (i would say soon, but i can't count on that lol)
Rambling now...*wanders away*

  Comment From The Writer: You read Order of the Phoenix in ONE DAY???? Are you kidding me???? It's been what, more than a week and I'm still only halfway through!!! I bet I'm the only person on the planet who hasn't finished it yet aren't I? Curse it! LOL!

You know you should have got Mod's Choice for chapter 12! If i was a mod i definitely would have picked it, but *sigh* no accounting for taste i suppose.

And yes i did read 'order of the Phoenix' in one day lol, but don't worry i bet you finished it before my mum did, she reads so slow! I had to read Lord of the Rings to her, it would have taken her forever else.

I want more FW! I want it now! And also the conclusion to 'the Name on the Tower' wouldn't go amiss either. You have no one to blame but yourself, it wasn't my fault you wrote these wonderful works and stuck them up here so i could pester you. See all your own fault ^_^

Comment From The Writer: Damn right I should have got Mod's Choice for Chapter 12! You hear that, Mods? :) Seriously though; maybe I'm just starting to get cocky with all this praise, but... I WAS kind of expecting a MC for Chapter 12. I mean, I got one for Chapter 4, which I didn't even think was particularly special - but I consider 12 as one of my best. Oh well. Like you said, it depends on the mods' taste I guess...

Order of the Phoenix: NOT HAPPY J.K!!! That was my favourite character too!!! *glares*

FW and NOTT: I'm TRYING!! I just haven't had time to write creatively lately, what with all these assignments my teachers keep throwing at me; and now my brother just got Zelda: the Wind Waker, and the temptation to eat up all my spare time with that is just too great; and I really want to read the rest of your Grim story too...

I'll get around to writing more as soon as I get some decent spare time, I promise you. Your nagging always spurs me into action, lol, so keep doing it :)

Your nagging always spurs me into action, lol, so keep doing it :)<<<< You might regret saying that!!

And yes i am disappointed about chapter 12, not cocky, it was genuinely well worth it...hmm, oh well :( i'll give you a star, no one will see it of course, but you'll know it's there lol. And i guess that's all that matters ;)

Comment From The Writer: LOL! Yeah, you're probably right!
Awwww, thank you! Chapter 12 can be my 'unofficial' Mod's Choice :)

I deems this an adequate amount of time since last update...i want more!
Why do i not have more yet?!
nagnagnagnagnagnag pesterpesterpesterpeseterpester nagnagnagnag <'cause it's easier to type ^_^
More!

Comment From The Writer: Uh-oh... I had a feeling you were going to start nagging... Ummmmmmm? *tries to think of another excuse and gives up*
All I can say is that I just haven't been in a writing mood lately (and I need to be enthusiastic to write this next FW scene - you want it to be good, don't you? :) ) Look, you'll get it eventually, I promise. I just need to get my flow back.

You're a very talented writer, I applaud you for receiving these Mod's Choices. Your stories and poems are beautifully written. Dang, I just finished three of your pieces and I have already had a sudden, inevitable urge to read the entire library. G2g!

  Comment From The Writer: LOL! My writing has a strange habit of doing that to people... no idea why... hey, wait a minute - 'Little Red'? You're not a Shannara fan, by any chance? If so... you ROCK! :D

I didn't start reading yet, but I have the feeling that I will spend some time around here for a while, I'm someone that wants to read all the stories of a good writer, and I didn't finish Rebecca's library yet, although that almost endless list of bookmarks isn't relaxing either. And not to think about all those days that I don't check mod's choices, to make matters worse not all good writers get a mod's choice, so all in all it's quite hopeless for me.

Comment From The Writer: Tell me about it. I have about a million stories saved in my 'To Read' folder *sigh*. If you miss mod's choices, there's a page (accessed from the main Ewood page) where you can see about a weeks worth of them. I've found some truly, truly AMAZING writers through Mod's Choices. It pays to read 'em!

How's this for an idea - as well as MC's, why don't we have 'People's Choice' awards - where WE get to vote for OUR favourite works?

Thanks for visiting, by the way - even if you haven't read anything yet, I really appreciate it!

All right, so I admit, I've only read part 1 of "The Name on the Tower", but I *WILL* get around to reading them all eventually. In other words, I'll probably finish the rest tomorrow. You're a fantastic writer, and I gotta admit... I'm hooked too, LOLZ. Keep on writing!

  Comment From The Writer: Maybe I should take up angling, lol! *lame joke, never mind*
You have an 'X' for a middle initial! How cool is that? :)

Hullo been back and been reading, whilst i've been able, evil phoneline is killing the net else i would have been over much earlier *nods*
Anyway nice to see you have another well deserved star...although if it was where it was supposed to be, you wouldn't have that other one...ah well you got another one, well deserved it was too.
Rabbit, rabbit...*sigh*
More soon please ^_^

Comment From The Writer: Will do my best :)

Angling!! Ahahahaha...hah.... ^_^;;; never mind. heheh... my middle name is Xian, it's Chinese. It was something else, but my adopted mom shortened it or something. But yeah, anyways, you're from Tasmania, Australia! That's cool! What's it like, huh?

Comment From The Writer: Ha ha... I'm glad someone found that funny *rolls eyes* Xian... ooooh nice!

What's it like here? At the moment... cold. I hate winter. *sniff* You'd think it'd give me inspiration or something, lol :) Something that DOES give me inspiration though, is the scenery around here. Absolutely GORGEOUS. Tassie is a really lovely place to live, even if it is a bit chillier than the rest of Australia. I was born here and have lived here all my life. Only been to the mainland like 3 times in my entire life! (Never been overseas. *sniff*)

Yay, you finished NOTT! Love the ending, congrats on getting feathers for both of them. Anywho, I updated again, or at least I will have in a day or so, considering how fast the library mods have been working recently. :)

Comment From The Writer: Thanks! I'm glad I finally finished it too, lol!

I add my thanks for the credit on your nickname! I feel so special....

*grins happily and leaves cookies on your doorstep* Assuming you have a doorstep. If not, then.... through your window! Assuming you have a window. If not, then..... that's a bad thing and you should get one! *nods her head decisively*

..... I'll be leaving now....

  Comment From The Writer: *opens door and sees cookies on doorstep* ooooooh coooookies! :)

*looks at her above comment* *looks down at note at bottom: HTML won't work* *glares hard at above comment* *turns her back and ignores comment* *comment pleads* *gives in and accepts the comment for what it is* *curses HTML for not working* *curses herself for not reading stupid note at bottom* *leaves, still cursing*

  Comment From The Writer: Hey, look! The html fixed itself up when I commented!

*blesses cursed html for 'fixing itself'*
*curses blessed cursed html for 'fixing itself', rendering her above comment pointless*
*curses herself for being so stupid again*
*curses just for the heck of it*
*curses some more...*
*curses..*
*curses...*

*gets tired of cursing so much*
*should really go to bed*
*hasn't gone to bed yet because she's not done commenting*
*is nearly falling asleep*
*wants to go to bed and is *almost* done commenting*
*is still commenting for no apparent reason*
*is being repetitive which is a bad thing*
*is still being repetitive which is still a bad thing*
*falls asleep*
*wakes up*
*finishes commenting*
*says sorry*
*says goodbye and goodnight*
(*curses*)

Comment From The Writer: LOL! You're mad :)

*clocks name*
ROTF!!
*much chuckling is heard*
Very nice...very nice indeed...
Hmm...i was once accused of a similar thing...but as it was i seem to have a fetish for hooking people, i don't think i'll be changing my name just yet.
*grins* Great name!
I'll be back soon for update...

  Comment From The Writer: Another FW update looms... just letting you know :) I've been working on it every day, trying to get as much finished as possible before I have to go back to school. *sigh*

Rofl Bethany! Hilarious... :p Must read now... Yes I shall.
*reads laboriously*
~Ash

One more thing, Megan... I have a favor to beg of you. I would appreciate it sooooo much if you could pretty pretty please send me an email with some basic HTML codes that you used for your bio cause you have the coolest bio around and HTML is not my friend (Honestly, I know -no- HTML). And my bio wont even space properly. *cries* Don't look at it, its embarassing! *grovel* Pleeeeease, I'll love you forever and buy all of your books when you get published... ;)
~Ashley

  Comment From The Writer: LOL! Watch out, I might hold you to that! ;) I have the coolest bio around? Do I? LOL! I thought it was a bit boring, to be honest! Becca and Bethany have way more interesting bios than mine, trust me :) Hey, no probs about the html, I'll be sending you an email shortly.

Yay! New ballad! Though I don't know if anything's going to be better than Archersbane...I don't think I've mentioned how much I like that one. :) Anywho, I've got a new short story up. :D

  Comment From The Writer: You don't think I can do better than Archersbane? I'll take that as a challenge :)

Ahahaha! You think my bio is interesting? I'll take that as a compliment, thank you very much. And I'm not mad. Trust me, I'm simply insane, and I'll also take that as a compliment. I've been working on it for years... *thinks casually of all the years wasted attempting to be mad...*

*poke* Updates! *poke poke* New story! *poke* See if the descriptions are any better, hahaha! *poke poke* I have a pattern going, lolz! *poke* I still haven't read all your stories... *poke poke* Notice how it's one poke then two pokes afterwards... *poke* heehee! *poke poke* Anyhow. *poke* I'll have to read that Archersbane one... *poke poke* I honestly haven't read it yet. *poke* But I'll stop poking you... soon.. *poke poke* See ya later! (*poke*)

Comment From The Writer: *pokes Bethany back* Quit *poke* poking! *poke poke* I'll be there in a second, but Darian asked first! :)
What do you mean you haven't read Archersbane??? Go *poke* and read it *poke poke* NOW!! *poke*

*poke poke* MORE UPDATES!! *poke poke poke* Yayzers! *poke poke* Second chapter of Quest for the Atrium is up. *poke poke poke* Notice that I have a new pattern today! *poke poke* It's now two pokes, then three pokes afterwards! *poke poke poke* Next time I update, I'll upgrade it to three pokes, then four pokes after... *poke poke* Then after that, four and five, etc. etc. etc.... *poke poke poke* Haha. This is fun. *poke poke* Don't mind me. *poke poke poke* Now to go and terrorize other people's pages... mwahahahaha... *poke poke*

*POOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOKE!!!*

Comment From The Writer: Arrhggghhhhhhh, not the poking again!! *runs away whimpering*

Here!

  Comment From The Writer: You're back!!! At last!! YAAAY!!

Thank you for your extensive commenting. I'll try to return that favor... in the distant, distant future... maybe.

  Comment From The Writer: No, thank YOU for writing such awe-inspiring stories :) I've been meaning to get back to your library (honest, I have!!) I promised I'd read your entire collection and I WILL if it kills me, lol :)

MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! *poke poke poke* The Harassing Poker of Ultimate Doom has returned!! *poke poke poke poke* Well.... you should know the drill by now. *poke poke poke* UPDATES of course!! *poke poke poke poke* But not more Quest... nope it's a new one called 'The Dragonites', and I need to know if it makes sense or not!! *poke poke poke* So... I'm appealing to you. *poke poke poke poke* I'll even stop poking you!! *crosses fingers behind her back* Maybe.

Comment From The Writer: *peers around doorway at the computer at the end of the hall, wondering if it's safe to go back yet*
You're EVIL!!

Hihi! I put up another story. *poke* Don't worry, I don't poke that much. *looks at above comment* Scary thought, isn't it?

Comment From The Writer: Yes. Very scary.

Haha. I'm scary, am I? What an interesting concept that is. *jabs with a fork* You know what? I'm hungry. *grins* And if you think jabbing is bad, just be grateful I didn't stab. And be grateful I'm not poking.

*pokepokepokepoke*

Oops. Spoke too soon. *pokepokepokepokepoke*

Anyways. (*pokepokepokepoke*) I revised the Druids, chapters 1 and 2. I'm hoping it is much much much much much much better. Hoping. Desperately. In other words, would you please come and see if it's any better? *pokepokepokepokepoke*

Please.

*jabs for good measure*

Comment From The Writer: OOOOW! *scowls* Now look here, that's uncalled for! There's no need to resort to sharp metal implements! The poking was bad enough!

But you did say please, so I suppose I forgive you. I suppose. *sniffs indignantly*

*mutters under breath: Now, what did I do with that Suspiciously-Stained Knife...?*

Lol! Bethany! Megan! You're both goobers! Yay, UPDATES! *scampers off to read*

  Comment From The Writer: *points at Pancake* She started it!!!

Hmmmmm? What was that? *innocent puppy dog look* What did you say about me?

*drops innocent act and glares*

*stabs at Megan with a random giggle stick* (MWAHAHA!)

As a punishment..... IT shall fall upon you!!!



[insert loud 'SPLAT' here]


*pokes happily at squirming puddle of Megan*

*is enjoying herself immensely*

*uses spatula to spread you out on site*

*your splattered self almost seems to read 'Updates!', but changes and now reads "This is a random comment from Me, and No Updates"

*is still enjoying herself immensely*

*pokes*
*considers*
*makes half-hearted attempt to scoop you into bucket to throw at Ashley*
*gives up*

*mops you up with a squeegee*

Comment From The Writer: ......

............

.................

........................

*sound of door creaking open breaks the silence*
*Requar walks in; stares at bucket for a long moment*
*sighs*
*sticks Sword of Healing in bucket*
*there is a brief, pale blue flash of light and Megan is regenerated*
*Requar clears his throat and quickly retreats back to FW at the look on Megan's face*

......


............

I forgave you for the poking. I forgave you for the forks.

*eyes narrow dangerously*

But THIS





MEANS





WAR.

Um. Just before the war starts, could you tell me how you do so many spaces? 'Cause.... ya know, multiple

tags don't work......

*sighs*

Hate to resort to this, but.... seems I have no other choice......

*takes out fork*

*jabs Megan forcefully with non-pointy end*

*Megan falls into Pit of Extreme Darkness*

...



....



.....



......



.......



........



.........


..........




...................................





...............................................






*SPLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT*

*winces*

*descends down into Pit with grappling hook(borrowed from Arven of course!)*

*scoops up squirming puddle of Megan in a bucket again*

*pats bucket lovingly telling you that she really does care*

*puts bucket in the dishwasher*

  Comment From The Writer: Ah, but multiple break tags do....

RIGHT. You're gonna pay for that....!


*rewinds time*

*strides into the SOMS*

*snatches Sword of Lightning out of the hands of the Enchanter*

*strides out, ignoring the shocked looks on the faces of Arzath, Requar and the 200 other sorcerers assembled in the hall*

*fast-forwards to present day*

*points Sword of Lightning at you*

*loud sizzle as a blinding flash of purple lightning shoots forth and slams into you, hurling you in a great crackling, glowing stream across Elfwood until you finally collide with a random tree*

*strolls casually over to your horribly charred, smoking corpse*

*smirks*

*chops what's left of your body into little tiny pieces*

*hums pleasantly as she puts pieces in a blender with some chopped banana and makes a smoothie*

*hands smoothie to a random passer-by*

*grabs smoothie* *sniff* Ahh, the smell of charred flesh.... *feeds smoothie to Twit*

  Comment From The Writer: AHAHAHAHA! I have an ally!!

*loud 'POOF', and Kariscus appears*
*groans in a hopeless manner, shakes his head, and reconstructs Bethany*
*is regurgitated onto floor*

*orders Twit to bite of Darian's head*

*takes a deep breath*



Where should I start? Oh yeah....




BANANAS??????????? WHY BANANAS????????




I





HATE




BANANAS!!!!!!!!!!



And..... I.... I wasn't that evil. I just.... you know, cleaned you up a bit. *looks around innocently* What, the dishwashing soap's not poison!!! Or is it?
*glares*
I DID jab you with the NON-POINTY end of the fork!!!!!! You should be grateful!!!!


*glares*


*grabs Megan and stuffs her in a trombone*

*blows the loudest blow she can*

*Megan goes flying out, hits brick wall on other side of page*


*strolls over to your still form casually*

*snickers*

*peels your paper-thin figure off wall*

*smiles happily and tacks it up on her own wall*

*pokes you with safety pins* (Ironic, eh? **SAFETY** pins?)

*arms herself with forks*

*feeds you to Twit*

*smirks quietly*

*retreats back to own page*

(Worse fates are sure to come. I just fail to think of any right now......)

TO BE CONTINUED..............

Comment From The Writer: *twit regurgitates Megan - no like taste*

*Megan staggers to her feet and picks up Sword again*

*tries to aim, but is laughing too hard*

*collapses to the ground in hysterics*

*is unable to recover for some time*







*is still laughing*

*retaliates from Attack of Bananas with volley of pumpkins*

*laughs maniacally as pumpkins are smashed all over your page*


*grabs paint can and paints your page neon orange and green striped*

*hides your paint thinner*

*covers page with typos*






*steps back in contentment as typo army surrounds you*

*laughs hysterically*

NONE ESCAPE MY TYPO ARMY!!!!!! YOU SHALL GO INSANE!!!!
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

*launches grammar errors at you*


*giggles madly*


*retreats back into shadows, fork glinting*

Comment From The Writer:

*shrieks*



NOT TYPOS!!!



NOT GRAMMAR ERRORS!!!



NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

*cries*

*bashes Bethany into floor with tennis racket until she is nothing but a gooey pulp*

*gets a paint roller and paints over neon orange and green with Bethany-goo*

*gives a glare that could turn lava into ice-cubes*

*frantically gathers up typos and pumpkin pieces*

*pelts them at Typo Army*

*glares again*

*stalks off to sharpen fish-hooks...*

Muahahahaha......*pokes Twit's prone form* Stupid cat...don't worry, it's not dead, just in a shadowbind. Ehehehe....whaaat? I'm a shadowmage here on the woods....probably the first anyone's heard about it, but I am....Why's everyone staring? *cloaks self in shadow and hides in the basement* *pokes head out* *is bombarded by apples* *quickly runs back to own page, leaving a trail of smoke that reads: .......I'll be back.......*

Comment From The Writer: *looks disappointed* It's not dead? Damn. What a shame.

Er?



*converts into her fifth personality, Vee-Duh the Evil Smelling Fifht Personality*












BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!
*pokes you with Door Knob of Doom*

p0ke p0ke p0ke p0ke p0ke p0ke p0ke p0ke

*pokes you with Pencil of Disdain*

p0ke p0ke p0ke p0ke p0ke p0ke p0ke p0ke

*slips on a banana peel and falls into Pit of Extreme Darkness*

..


...


....


......


.....


.



....



.



.
....


...


.....
...




......



.
.

....



.
......



......



.....

*SPLAAAAAAAAAAAAT!*

Christopher: *malicious grin* Well, I wonder where that banana peel came from...

Comment From The Writer: You poked me.

*brandishes freshly sharpened fishhooks menacingly*

*pauses*

*watches Vida disappear into Pit*











Handy thing, that Pit of Extreme Darkness. :)

*storms onto page in a rage*

YOU KILLED ME, DAMNIT!!!



*all chatter on page ceases*

*Bethany glances around slowly*

*notices Megan's plus everyone else's curious glances and skeptical stares*

I... uh..... reincarnated myself? Well, that's not the point.



*glares at above comment*

HOW DARE YOU USE MY PIT OF EXTREME DARKNESS AS A TRAP FOR UNKNOWING VISITORS!!!!!!!!!

(hey, actually, that's a pretty good idea....)

(THAT'S NOT THE POINT!!)

(get a hold of yourself, geez....)

(NO.)

*brandishes freshly sharpened and shiny fork*

(eheheheh... like the nickname?)

*leaps on Megan and stabs her numerous times leaving pool of blood on page*

*hyperventilates*

*pantpantpant*

*pantpantpant*

*pantpantpant*

*pantpant*

*pant*


Once upon a time there was an Angler.
She was meticulously murdered by the Malicious, Malevolent, and Somewhat Evil Fork Master Who Maliciously, Malevolently, and Oh So Evilly Throws Flying Objects At Certain Elfwoodians.

*leaps high in the air and pelts you with numerous flying objects*

*frying pan bounces off your head followed by a spare fork*

*Megan is pummeled by numerous kinds of cookies*

YES!!!! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
EAT!!! EAT!!!! EAT THE HYDROGENATED OILY COOKIES THAT WILL LIQUIFY YOUR INSIDES!!!!

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

The End.

  Comment From The Writer: I do believe I made her mad...

Well, you deserved it! That Typo Attack was CRUEL! CRUEL AND UNFORGIVABLE!

(Oh yeah, did I forget to add something?)

Along with a new nickname.... (AHAHAHA, no more Fruitsy! *sniggers uncontrollably* *glares*).... I also have updates. Finally.....

*gives Megan penetrating stare*

You will come. YOU WILL COOOOOOOOOOME!!!

*forces you to come to page with Admirable Psychic Powers*

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Comment From The Writer: I laugh at your nickname. I scoff at your Admirable Psychic Powers.

*SCOFF!*

........

...........

...................

*goes off to Bethany's page anyway...*

*twitches*


*offers cookies*



























Truce?

Comment From The Writer: *stares at cookies for a long moment*

*stares at Bethany for a long moment*

*stares at cookies for an even longer moment*













This better not be a trick...













*sighs*



Oh, all right. *accepts cookies gratefully*

Truce!

Death: *scratches his skull with his scythe* Something's not quite good around here.... Er... Oh, right. *revives Vida*





Me: Bwahahahaha! I-didn't-poke-you. It-was-Vee-Duh,-my-evil-personality. I'd-never-poke-you.
*offers you a cookie to show how much I like you*

*assures you that the cookie isn't poisonuous*

*leaves, flying a banner TERRY PRATCHETT RULES!!!!*

  Comment From The Writer: Er... okay... *takes cookie with a somewhat bewildered expression on her face*

My, a lot of people are giving me cookies today, aren't they? *munches happily*

Wooohooo! *gets out own Pratchett sign and jiggles it enthusiastically* Yay for Pratchett!!

Truce for now.



*grins enthusiastically, and is even in a good enough mood to give you back your paint thinner(which she stole a while ago, but didn't know if you noticed)*



*paints your whole page dark pink and purple*


*paints likkle smilies all over it*


*paints big sign that says: "I Don't Think I've Ever Read Any Terry Pratchett"*


*paints dragons and "Merry Christmas" on roof and floor*



(Please. Just DON'T ASK where I got the combination of dragons and Christmas!! Honestly, I don't know!!)


(Please. Just DON'T ASK why I put that there if I don't want you asking.)


(Please. Just DON'T ASK why I'm putting this here either. I'm clueless.)






Ah yes.



So.


Truce.


For now.


*repeats herself just for good measure and to remind herself*


For.

Now.

Comment From The Writer: Heeeey... I forgot about that paint thinner!

Dark pink and purple!! YAAAY! I've always wanted my bedroom dark pink... *looks wistful*

You've never read any Pratchett?? *drops cookie she was eating in horror* You have to! I demand you go and read one of the Discworld books, NOW! (My favourite being 'The Last Continent' 'cause it's about Australia, ehehe. And completely hilarious, of course).

Ah yes. Truce. Ahem. Yes.

For now.

I'm going to post random comments ALL OVER your page, ok?


Good.

Comment From The Writer: As long as they don't involve...(dare I say it) forks *ahem* that's fine with me!

Ello again. I updated. Hehehe. Me and my new stories. Hehehe. I should really get to work on Against All Else some more. Hehehe. Ok. I'm done rambling now. Bye. :D

  Comment From The Writer: Yeah, you should! C'mon, I wanna read some more of that! New story, eh? I'll be right there.

Hello.

Comment From The Writer: Hello, I'll have a large pepperoni pizza, thick crust, to pick up for Megan Proverbs. Thanks. Hello? Hello? Damn. Must have dialed the wrong number.

Did you want Italian Garlic, or Jalapeno Pepper sauce with that?

Comment From The Writer: Italian Garlic, please.

Very good, ma'am. Your pizza will be delivered at 4:53 AM January 12/04. Thank you for ordering from Frok's Best Pizza In The World Parlour, and have a nice, bouncy, and oh so frolicky day.

  Comment From The Writer: *curses* That's the last time I order from THAT place...

Hello. Would you like to come visit me? There's a present for you if you do. It's........Chapter two! I sure hope you can come!

  Comment From The Writer: Wooohooo! You bet I'd like to come!!! *drops everything and rushes off to Crystal's page, determined to get there before Bethany*

You asked for it, now it's here! Yep, new chapter of Against All Else. :D

  Comment From The Writer: Man, you updated fast! Now, what's the bet your sister got there first?

I terrorize you because I can.

*scatters pumpkin seeds all over*

  Comment From The Writer: I am dangerously close to changing my mind about that truce, you know.

*aims Holy Hand-Grenade of Antioch at pumpkin seeds*
*pulls pin and throws*

...

..

.

*large explosion*

Ehehe, no more seeds. Whoops....*looks around at devastation* Guess I should have used a smaller grenade....

  Comment From The Writer: *walks in and immediately dives for cover*







*emerges coughing and waving smoke away from her face*

I appreciate you *cough* getting rid of those horrible *cough* pumpkin seeds, but DID YOU HAVE TO BLOW MY PLACE TO SMITHEREENS?? Just look... you've gone and ruined my lovely pink-and-purple-smiley-dragon-christmas-covered walls! You can jolly well go and clean all this mess up now, thank you!

*belts out typo song loud and clear*

DARIAN MADE A TYPO, DARIAN MADE A TYPO!!!!

*jabs typo with fork*

It's DEVASTATION, not 'devestation'.

I AM SO SMART!
I AM SO SMART!
SMRT!
SMRT!
(have you ever watched the simpsons?)

Comment From The Writer: Typo? *looks innocent* What typo would that be? Honestly, I think you must be imagining things...

Yes, I have watched the Simpsons, but I must have missed that episode. o_O And I lay the blame for all this *gestures at ruined page* entirely on YOU. *picks up a half-charred thesaurus and flings it at Bethany, knocking her into her own Pit of Extreme Darkness*

*leafs through shelf, drools on keyboard in awe*

I'd make a hollow threat about bookmarking your site but I did a while ago. You seriously rock on a usually unprecidented scale. *envy*

  Comment From The Writer: Did you? I can't remember... Have I visited your page? I can't remember that either! Oh well, I'll be sure to come around as soon as I can. :) Thank you so much!

I guess that's what I get for using a weapon from Monty Python. Ehehehe......

......

....

...

..

.

Yeah, it's a Python grenade. I didn't steal it, I swear. It just showed up in my mailbox one day.

*Peanut pops in*

Peanut: *sniff sniff* Mrrow?

Peanut doesn't like pumpkins....

Yes, I realize this entire comment had no point except for procrastination....*sigh*. *gets to work vaporizing rubble with shadowstaff, muttering under breath about 'faulty mail orders'*

Comment From The Writer: You mean it wasn't supposed to blow my place to smithereens? *eyes you suspiciously* Then what...? No, no, don't answer that. If it's a Python weapon, I really don't want to know.

*clambers unsteadily out of Pit, clothes torn and dirty, blood smearing cheek*

*smiles innocently, and wobbles dangerously close to Pit edge*

Wh-wh-what P-P-Pit? I d-don't s-see any Pit. Y-you m-must b-be im-magining th-things.

And w-why is th-this m-m-my f-fault? It w-was D-Darian wh-who b-blew the p-place t-to s-smithereens. It w-was h-his f-fault. I-I'm th-the innocent one.

*collapses twitching on the floor and falls asleep*

*Twit stalks in*

Twit:: MRRRRRRRRRRRRRROW!!

*scares Peanut off page, and purrs in satisfaction*

*Beth wakes up*

Heheheh... T-Twit d-doesn't l-like P-Peanut. B-but of course, T-Twit d-doesn't l-like D-Darian either.

*grins vaguely, waves, and falls unconscious among debris*

Comment From The Writer: Innocent? Hahaha, pull the other one, it plays Waltzing Matilda. You terrorized me with pumpkin seeds, and I refuse to feel sorry for you. *nudges your unconcious form none too softly with her boot* And get up, you're making the place look untidy. *looks around* Untidi-er.

*refuses to get up and latches onto a piece of junk for safety*

*eyes Megan's boot shiftily*

*POKE*

*STAB*

*JAB*

JUST KIDDING!!! Okay, okay, I take it back. *holds up hands defensively, but soon goes back to hugging debris* I'm sorry.

But I have updates, and I couldn't resist. Quest chapter 4, Dragonites chapter 2, AND That Which Was Hidden chapter 2 are all up... in the shortest time I've ever had a ticket go through(2 hrs!! The excitement!).

*nudges boot with her foot*

You get that away from me!

Comment From The Writer: *boot taps menacingly* You are testing my patience...

*tapping stops abruptly at mention of updates*

*looks at the homework assignment she HAD intended to work on today*

Bah, it can wait. *tosses homework on the floor and rushes off to Bethany's page*

*glances down at poor, dejected homework lying on the floor*

*wags finger at Megan's retreating back*

Shame on you! Rejecting your poor, helpless homework like that....
No, okay, I'm just kidding... homework is neither poor, nor dejected, nor helpless. Hmph.

But guess what????








YOU WERE THE 100TH COMMENTER ON MY PAGE!!!

*cheers*

*applause*

*pink and purple fireworks go off*

*streamers go flying off in every possible direction*

*showers Megan's page in multicoloured balloons*

HURRAY!!!

Well, now we gotta do something special, yesyesyes. Hmmm.... I will think on it.

Comment From The Writer: That's right. Homework is EVIL, and ought to be illegal. YAY! 100th commenter! Whoooo! WhatdoIget, huh? WhatdoIget?

*yells furiously in a vengeful tone:

DECK THE HALLS WITH BOWS AND STRANGLERS,
FA LA LA LA LA, LA LA LA LA!
'TIS THE DAY TO KILL THE ANGLER,
FA LA LA LA LA, LA LA LA LA!
PUMPKINS SQUISHING EVERYWHERE,
MWAHAHA, HAHAHA, HA HA HA!
WATCH YOUR FOOT THERE'S GREEN PAINT THERE,
HAHAHAHA, HA HA HA HA!*

*yanks numerous dagger-like forks out of belt and whips at you, pinning you to wall*

Hmm.... now that you're out of the way..... *considers*

*pulls out paint roller and proceeds to paint your entire page a VERY MERRY GLITTERY NEON GREEN!!*

*places HUGE rotting pumpkins in corners, and scatters pumpkin seeds all over floor*

*scrutinizes page with practiced eye* Perhaps a bit more orange would be nice?

*flourishes Zalrega's ugly orange couch, and sticks in the middle of the floor*

And just for the heck of it.... *sniggers uncontrollably*

*nails HUGE picture of a medical needle to wall opposite of you*

REVENGE IS MINE!!!
HAVE A NICE HOLIDAY!!! MWAHAHAHAHA!!

  Comment From The Writer: *rips stupid forks out of herself and hurls them as hard as she can at Bethany's retreating back*

*staggers off, dripping blood, to find Requar's Sword*







*returns, fully healed and VERY, VERY ANGRY*

*rips stupid picture of horrible medical needle off the wall and burns it*

*shreds Zalrega's stupid ugly orange couch*

*starts to roll pumpkins towards the Pit of Extreme Darkness, then has a better idea*

*rolls pumpkins towards Bethany's page instead....*

Ehehehehehehe........*summons a random gnome*

*gnome starts eating pumpkins*

........

*smacks gnome*

*directs gnome towards Twit*

  Comment From The Writer: *cackles with insane laughter*

*zooms in, carrying a handful of papers*

All the stories have been dejected
Fa la la la la la la la la!
And the typos have been corrected
Fa la la la la la la la la!

*throws the papers into the air and watches them fall*

*throws a water balloon filled with YELLOW paint at your chest*

*the baloon smashes, leaving you yellow like a canary*

A N I M A L H A T E R!!!!!!!

*zooms off, leaving a note "thanks for the typo spotting. p.s. this will be war*

Comment From The Writer: I am NOT an animal hater!! *looks hurt* I didn't HURT Twit and Silven, I just... *struggles to keep a straight face* gave them a bit of a makeover, that's all!

*takes Sword of Lightning out of the closet where she stashed it*

*blasts you in the back with it as you leave*

*blasts papers on floor to cinders*

*goes off to have a shower*

*zooms by and skids to stop by your page*

Tut tut. *surveys paper and Vida bits with distaste*

Now look what you did to the beautiful glittery neon green paint. I'll have to compensate. *splashes paint all over floor to cover the yellow bits*

*scoops Vida bits into bucket and zooms off, cackling merrily*

(Ah, ah... what you get for being both 100th page and 50th main page commenter is a surprise... mwahahahaha...)

Comment From The Writer: *comes back*

*glares at paint all over floor, walls, and er... pretty much everything*

*drags a random goblin out of Arzath's keep, shoves a scrubbing brush into its hands and orders it to get to work*

*starts ransacking fridge and pantry*

*places ammunition in a cardboard box and strides out, leaving a trail of bright green footprints through the Woods...*

Ehehehehe.....hmm.....*wonders what happened to gnome* *doesn't particularly care* ... *summons a random pigeon* *overfeeds pigeon and sends it flying over Bethany's head* Ehehehehehehe...........

  Comment From The Writer: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!

Am I alive... or am I dead...?


Death: Er? Stop looking at me! Why do **I** always have to do your bidding???


*GLARE*


Death: *tut tut* Whatever... *swishes scythe*


I LIIIIIIIIVE!!!! *thunder* BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Er... have a cookie! *offers you a cookie*

And trust me... I do not fall so low to poison your food.




















Well, sometimes I do. *evil grin*

Comment From The Writer: *takes cookie reluctantly and peers at it suspiciously*

*takes an experimental nibble*

*face suddenly goes very pale and cookie drops from her hand*

*clutches at her throat in panic, choking*

*sways unsteadily*

*collapses*



*Requar rushes in, unsheathing his sword in a fluid motion*

*drops to Megan's side and tries to heal her, but...*





*Requar looks up at Vida in horror and grief*

Y-you... you've killed her!!

*grins happily*

LINKAGE!!!

OH, I WUV you!! Thankies! *huggles Megan's corpse*

*pauses and steps away from Megan* Wait a minute... there's something wrong with this....

*rewinds time*

Let's try this again.



*approaches Angler's page stealthily, cloaked and hooded in black*

*twirls forks expertly, checking sharpness*

*prepares to attack, but pauses when spots Megan lying pale and lifeless on floor*

*wanders over and pokes body experimentally with fork*

Hm. Stone dead.

*Angler's hand suddenly reaches up and grasps Beth around neck*

ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGH!!! SHE LIVES!!! THE SPIRIT OF THE ANGLER LIVES!!!

*wrenches self out of Megan's death-hold, and scampers away, whimpering*

*turns at edge of Megan's page, and points shaking finger at zombie-like form*

Oh, you'll pay for that. Just wait... you'll pay....

*throws pumpkin powder in the air, and disappears in puff of orange smoke*

Comment From The Writer: *The Angler glares at Death as he approaches her in the shadowy plane between worlds*

*Death raises his scythe, but Megan snatches it off him and hacks his own skull off with it*

Hmmph. I can't die yet, I'm in the middle of a war!

*restores herself to the living world...*







*wakes just in time to scare the living daylights out of Bethany*

*rises dramatically, while an impressive peal of thunder rattles the windows*

*eyes blaze with a fiery crimson light*

*watches Beth disappear*









*bursts into hysterical laughter*

Guess what!

*drumroll*

*is on the verge of saying something very ironical and intelligent*

If you killed Death - that means he can't take anyone's soul - which means no one can die - which means----


YOU DIDN'T KILL ME!!!!!!!!!!!

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ohohoho I am so smart and witty...


*breaks all your fishhooks and throws them into Bloody Deep Ditch*

*zooms away, laughing horridly*

Comment From The Writer: *climbs carefully down into Ditch to retrieve fishhooks*

*notes with satisfaction that they are still quite shiny and intact*

  Titanium, you know. It's quite difficult to break. Almost impossible, in fact.

One last thing - Merry X-Mas!

*gives you a huge, life-size mechanical Santa who sings X-Mas carrols while swaying his fat hips. You can't turn the Santa off, or dispose of him. You can't destroy it either. Instead, you must go insane by hearing "Silent Night", "We Wish You A Merry Christmas", "Twelve Days Of Christmas", "Rudolpf, the Red-Nosed Reindeer", and "Jingle Bells" over and over and over and over again*

Have a merry little X-Mas!

Comment From The Writer: *stares speechlessly at singing Santa*

*desperately tries to find an 'off' switch*

*failing that, starts bashing him with one of her fishhooks, but it simply bounces off with a mocking, metallic sound*

*looks horrified*

*attempts to push Santa towards the Pit, but he will not budge*

*picks up Sword of Lightning and blasts him*

*the infuriating sound of carols continues merrily through the smoke*

*tosses Sword aside and gets out a chainsaw*

*sparks fly everywhere, and the chain eventually snaps*

*the Santa continues to sing and dance stupidly, without so much as a scratch or dent*

*Megan finally sighs in resignation*

Oh well. If you can't beat 'em...

*stretches out on remains of Zalrega's couch and sings along happily to 'Twelve Days of Christmas'*

*sneaks onto page in the dead of night* *steals stupid santa* *leaves for Vida's page*

Comment From The Writer: *continues to sing 'Jingle Bells' in a kind of trance, oblivious to the fact that the Santa is now gone*

E By Grim! Look at all that space...first off i come on the page and it's,
"My Eyes! My Eyes! I can't see...it's all gone green and red...oh no! Have mercy!"
Then it's all...
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH i have a link! Thankies!!
Then i'm like...
Whoa! Space...too much space!
*chuckles* anyway! I'm back for a bit, so i thought i'd pop by, plus i'm on the touting trail!
I have New Grim! Aspects of Death!! Back by popular demand. I'm only here because i've basically forgotten who i'm supposed to be telling, and who i've emailed...i think you finished it...i can't remember. Oh i'm so confused *holds head*
Anywho...i'll be back soon to read your sci-fi!
I want more FW!! NOW!!
*pokepokepesterpester*

Comment From The Writer: BECCA!! So you haven't forgotten poor Angler then, haha! *grins happily* NEW GRIM!! ALL RIIIGGGGHHHTT!!

FW... hmmm, yes, it's been a long time since the last update, hasn't it? The Ghost of Homework Past has been haunting me for the past few weeks, but it's gone now. *sigh of relief* So I'll get to work on it very soon. After Grim. Heheh.

Oh, and, er... *glances at above Death comment* No offense to Reao, heh. 'Twas a different Death, of course. I would never hack Reao's gorgeous head off :)

*sneaks up behind oblivious singing Angler*

Oh yessssss.... we Lewises are sneaky, yes we are. Too bad HE'S on the other side.

Anyway, I decided to come and pay you a nice little christmas visit, since I haven't for a little while. And.... I have a present for you! Yesyes! Present! That's right!

*passes Megan huge load of Terry Pratchett and Tolkien books*

*Megan is so overwhelmed and weighted down by books that she and the books all fall to the floor in a huge pile, and Megan is knocked unconscious*

*snickers lightly behind her hand*

AHA!!

*darts in, steals Angler's fishhooks, and speeds off to secret underground laboratory*




*once in lab, flourishes numerous machines with a grin*

I've done my homework, yes I have. Apparently, titanium melts at 1941 or 1668*C. So. We will have to try and get to that heat.

*places fishhooks inside machine and turns up the heat*

Melt. *starts chanting* Melt! Melt! Melt! Melt!

*turns heat up about halfway*

Not hot enough. Hmph.

*turns heat 3/4 of the way up*

NOT HOT ENOUGH. MELT, DAMNIT!!

*slams heat on all the way, accidentally jarring and wedging heat controls where they are*








Oh.









Damn.

Comment From The Writer: *sits up dazedly amidst avalanche of books*

*picks up nearest one to hand*

Hey, cool! I needed a new copy of Lord of the Rings...

*starts flicking happily through books*

WAIT. What am I doing?!

*tosses books aside and gets up, looking around furiously*

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHH!!! Where are my fishhooks??

*hunts for fishhooks amongst the pile of books, but is unable to find them*

*starts to panic*

MY LOVELY, NEW, TITANIUM FISHHOOKS! WHERE ARE THEY??!!

*notices open door*

FORK MASTER!!!!!

*strides angrily towards the door*

*is suddenly knocked to the floor by an enormous explosion*

*lifts her head tentatively after the noise and shaking have finally died away, and blinks in astonishment*

What the...?!

*gets up and walks outside, only to be confronted by a huge, glowing red crater*

*waits until the heat subsides and climbs down into hole with the aid of a rope*

*bottom of hole contains what appears to be the ruins of a laboratory, filled with melted, twisted chunks of machinery*

*prises somewhat blackened, but still intact, fishhooks from the remains of a machine*

*strolls over to slightly bubbling puddle of melted Bethany, polishing hooks with a handkerchief*

*grins down at puddle in amusement*

My, my. What a mess you've created. Get a bit hot for you, did it? Hmmmmm?

But NOT HOT ENOUGH, methinks!

*laughs brightly*

*scoops melted Bethany into a bucket and climbs out of hole*

*adds several jars of wasabi and a handful of chillies to bucket*

*stirs thoroughly, singing 'Feel it hot, hot, hot'*

*carries bucket off to Vida's page*

*hopps from Darian's page, massageing her buttocks and trying to hide the enormous hole on her jeans*

I have but one question. Is my page a junkyard?

No. Does it look like one?

(yes)

Who said that?!

(bwahahahahaha!)

*confiscates Vee-Duh's cockroaches*

Please don't leave remains of people on my page.

Oh, and, you forgot something.

*dumps a wagonload of bananna peels, cockroaches, boogers, gleaming fishhooks, small insects and various debris on your head*

Cheerio.

*runs off*

Comment From The Writer: I'm sorry. I didn't know you'd quit.

*mutters miserably, being still in puddle-form*

Oh yeah, just leave me here, why not? I can ooze home by myself. Thanks. Yeah, that's right, thanks a lot. Thanks....

*puddly eyes transfer to pile of debris on floor*

Oh Megan, didn't you know? Vida's quit the war. That means you can't dump me on her page anymore. Haha. So there.

*mutters*



I'll just ooze home now, shall I? Yes, that's a good idea. *sighs*

I need a bath.

Comment From The Writer: No, I didn't know until now. *mutters something unintelligable*

*pats puddle of Bethany and looks around for something to wipe her hand on* Oh, I'll find somewhere else to dump you, never fear. *grins*

*oozes in, leaving trail of slime across the page*

The story I wrote for you is up... it's a dragon story! Don't you feel special? I'm not going to tell you anything about it though, so go and read!
Oh yeah, and new chapter of Dragonites as well.

I actually didn't come to terrorize you this time. Lucky you. *glares down at her puddly body* Not that I could at the moment. But your time will come... yes it will....

  Comment From The Writer: Awwwwww... you wrote me a story! About dragons! I'm so honoured! *starts to hug puddle and then thinks better of it*

Well, now. It'd be cruel of me to leave you here to ooze all the way back home again...

*takes out vaccuum cleaner and vaccuums up puddle of Bethany*

*reverses the suction and sprays you back onto your own page*

Aaaw... you've been so sad cuz I quit the war... well, that's not right, me making u miserable, is it now?

Nope, it isn't.

So - haha! - the Countess shall commence in battle once again!

*flies large Cookie banner*

*throws a laugh bomb in the middle of room. Tears come into your ewyes, and you start laughing so hard you head explodes and you die*

Mwah. Cheery mood, isn't it?

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!

I am a nice person, innit?

*runs*

Comment From The Writer: *explosion reverses and head reconstitutes back into one piece* (I killed Death, remember? Hah HAAAH!)

*takes a deep breath...*

Why... you... UNGRATEFUL...!!!! After I went 'round and apologised nicely and gave you chocolates and everything!!!

*curses for some time* I KNEW I should have poisoned them!!!

OOOOOHHHHH!!! NOW I'M MAD!!!!

*whips out fishhooks and gives chase*

a terry brooks fan i see, eh? Good. He has sparked ideas eh? I shall read your material. You should write pirate stories. Every1 here should write more pirate stories. Off to do some reading.

Comment From The Writer: I LOVE Terry Brooks. He's been a huge source of inspiration for me. I've read all of his books (with the exception of Hook and Star Wars). His airships are the coolest things EVER.

LOL! I take it you like pirates then? Well, who doesn't? A pirate story... actually, that's not a bad idea. I shall consider it. Thanks for commenting!

Alrighty, I'm bored, I want to write, and I have no clue which one of my stories to work on. SO....I'm gonna poll you ppl...hehe...what do you want? More Against All Else, more Darkstar, or a new short story? *copies comment to use as a form letter* :p hehe.

Comment From The Writer: I vote for Darkstar!

Hmm, you would appear to be the only one who voted...therefore, Darkstar it is. :D

  Comment From The Writer: Whoohoo!

*rushes in*

*sticks proximity paint-bombs to the doorframe*

*scatters thumbtacks and marbles around*

*kicks over Zalrega's couch and leaps behind it*

*snatches up Sword of Lightning and peers over top of couch, pointing sword at the door*

Muahahahaha, I dare anyone to come in here now!

*climbs in through the window and stares curiously at Megan, the Sword, and the numerous other objects around, all pointing at the door*

*mutters* That's funny. I wonder if she's trying to tell me something....


Oh well. I came to give you another Christmas present, as it IS Christmas Eve!



*throws a smoke bomb and a laugh bomb in the middle of the page*


Merry Christmas!


*scampers out before she starts laughing AND choking at the same time(not a good combo)*

Comment From The Writer: *whirls in surprise*

What...?!

*starts laughing, choking and cursing all at the same time*

I (hahaha) can't believe I (coughcoughsplutter) forgot the (cursescoughHAHAcurses) window (HAHAHAHAchokecurses)!!!

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!! *leaves large pile of ice mints outside the front door* Err...don't blast those. :p

Comment From The Writer: ICE (HAHAHA) MINTS!!

*runs towards the door*

*completely forgets about marbles and thumbtacks*

*laughter turns into a loud wail of pain*

OWOWOWOWOWOWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWW!!!!!





*whimpers*

*starts to pull herself up by the doorframe and then freezes*





Oh no.





The paint b--

[insert large, colourful, splattering explosion here]

*watches Megan tidying page from window*

Mwahaha. You're going to regret locking me in the fridge. *shivers* Don't ever remind me of that horrible experience again.



*pulls out tranquility dart gun and hits Megan in the back*

*Megan instantly drops to the ground, asleep for at least a few hours*



Now. *looks around at squeaky clean page, and proceeds to ravage*

*knocks down all the bookcases, and throws books all over the floor*

*digs into pantry and fridge(uggh...brrr...) and dumps food on top of the books, staining open pages and ripping covers*

*upturns furniture*

*ruins carpet with oil stains and holes*

*sends regrouped Typo Army after Angler's stories*

*splashes black paint all over walls, floors, pile of Megan's stuff, and Megan*





*looks around proudly at her work*

And as a finishing touch.... *pastes large picture of a shiny silver fork on the wall opposite Megan*

My trademark. *grins widely and exits through the now harmless door, leaving behind a note: When are more FW chapters coming????*

Comment From The Writer: *wakes up and stares in horror at the mess*

*throws fishhooks angrily at Typo Army*

*glares at picture of fork on the wall*

*sighs heavily and gets to work cleaning. AGAIN*

I never want to see paint again for the rest of my life...



FW... eh, I'm working on it, I promise. I'm just having a few problems with the plot at the moment, which I need to work out. I'll try and get chapter 19 out in the next week.

*flies to the room on the back of a huge, red dragon the size of one of the Twins*

Aaah, lovely atmosphere here... so quiet and tranquil... *evil smile*

*dragon opens mouth and breathes fire*

*the entire room is torched and burned down to the ground*

heh heh heh...

*you stand in the middle of everything, completely defenseless*

Weeeell... *juggles a dozen of water balloons filled with yellow, pink, shocking red and shocking green paint in her hands*

*bombs you with balloons*

Ooops... I can't juggle, you know. Guess I dropped them.

*duct-tapes you to a rocket and watches with glee as it flies towards space*

*the rocket crashes with Jupiter's surface*

[insert large explosion here]

That's for the poison ivy.

Happy New Year!

*flies off on her dragon*

Comment From The Writer: *a somewhat scorched (again... grrr!) Angler staggers to her feet in the middle of a huge smoking crater on the surface of Jupiter (does Jupiter have a surface? Oh well...)*

*pulls out a mobile phone which, against all common sense, survived the explosion*

*sends a hurried SMS back to Earth*

*waits impatiently while trying not to choke on the toxic gases*







(Some time later...)

*a flash of silver appears through the swirling atmosphere and an enormous, metallic dragon the size of the other Twin Tower lands beside Megan*

I call this the Mega Merc. It's a supremely intelligent, almost indestructible robot, constructed in a secret laboratory from the blueprints of the Mercury II, although greatly enhanced in size, as you can see. Furthermore...

*nods at the Merc*

*several hatches flip open and an array of devastating-looking guns whirr and snap into place*

...the Mega Merc is equipped with its own impressive collection of pain-enducing artillery.

*climbs aboard Mega Merc*

You BURNT my PAGE! That's just EVIL, that is! Well, so be it. You wanna play with dragons...

Prepare to get BURNED!!!

*dragon swoops towards Earth with a mighty roar, fire billowing from its jaws*

Ahhh!! *runs to stories with shield over head*

Comment From The Writer: Heheheheh. Don't worry, Merc's had his revenge. Now there's just one problem... where the HECK am I going to put a giant robot dragon the size of a Twin Tower??? Oh well. At least he doesn't need feeding. Of course, that doesn't mean he doesn't LIKE feeding... muahahaha.

Just don't make any sudden movements, and you'll be fine

Hey did you have a good christmas and new year?

Thankies ever so much for the link to 19 and 20!!

Wow, that chase with Cimmeran and the Murons...oooh suspenseful! Majorly suspenseful...and good old Sirranor he's a dark horse ain't he. You definitely like to build the mystery up around him *grins*
Ferrian better hurry up if he wants to find Requar alive...although you wouldn't kill him...would you? *nervous laugh*
You better not!

Clever conclusion to the battle of the Murons, i'll be back to leave a proper comment in the appropriate place when the queue returns and it's up here.

Fantastic as always. This tale just gets better! You know i can almost cope with the debilitating wait between chapters ^_~

  Comment From The Writer: Yes, I had a lovely Christmas and new year. Thanks! No problem! I'm so glad you like them! I think those two chapters are the most fun I've had since the tunnel scene, heheheh. Sirannor's like a Macgyver with a sword, he can find a way out of any situation, lol! You're just dying (no pun intended) to find out if I kill Requar, aren't you? *grins*

Eh, yeah, sorry about that long wait. That was mean :)

*a soft smell of burning metal crawls to your ever-smelling nostrils. You wonder what the smell is, so you turn around. You see your metallic dragon melting away, a huge, red dragon the size of a Twin Tower sitting on your dragon's remains and grinning at you. You gasp...*

*a soft smell of cinnamon comes to your ever-smelling nostrils. A heap of ashes is blown at your feet*

*a wizard appears and puffs at this heap of ashes. The wizard disappears with the visual equvivalent of a pop*

*the ashes rise and form a tall figure - me*

Why hello, Megan.

*I climb on my dragon's back and shoot you an evil look*

Heh heh heh. It's so nice, being back here again. I bring a present with me.

*dragon sucks in breath....*

:: silence ::

*dragon breathes a huge fire mushroom and burns you to the ground. There is nothing left of you but a heap of ashes*

Heh heh heh. *picks up the ashes and throws them into Bloody Deep Ditch*

*covers the Ditch with barb wire, leaves and a lot of land mines. Puts dragon to watch over ditch*

There. Now no one can get in. Or out.

Have a happy new year.

Comment From The Writer's Ashes: *a mysterious gust of wind blows the ashes of Megan out of Ditch, past barbed wire and into the face of your red dragon, causing it to sneeze uncontrollably*

Meanwhile...



[insert ominous music here]



*the puddle of melted Mega Merc slowly re-forms back into the shape of a dragon*

*Mega Merc clunks over to the still sneezing red dragon*

*watches in amusement for a while, then fires a stun grenade, causing red dragon to fall onto the land mines and barbed wire*

[insert series of huge explosions, sharp flying debris and pieces of red dragon here]

*walks onto page* Gah! *dodges flying pieces of dragon* Anywho...just came by to tell you I've completed my rewrite of Against All Else. First chapter is MUCH better now...I hope. Hehe. Danged merge...oh well, it'll be up once tickets are available again, or I could email it if you want. :D

  Comment From The Writer's Ashes: That's okay, I'll wait 'til the merge is over. Of course it will be much better, because you've been taking my advice, haven't you. HAVEN'T YOU. By the way... *pile of dust attempts to poke you, but only succeeds in scattering herself further* What happened to Darkstar?

I'm getting there..............................slowly. Hehe.

Comment From The Writer: Speaking of things moving slowly.... *scowls at Elfy management* MERGE???

*stares at exploding dragon*

*tears come down face*

MY BABY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You are so cruel! I'm gonna do something really, really horrible to you!

*picks up writer's ashes and throws them into a smelly green acid*

*watches with glee as ashes burn to nothingless*

Nobody messes with my dragon.

Comment From The Writer's Disembodied Voice: I'm going to get you for that...

Wh... why do you have to fight? War is so not nice... sob... sniffle...

Comment From The Writer: Awwww... but tormenting Beth and Vida is so much fun!





Oh.... oh ALL RIGHT! *hands Artie a tissue* Stop sniffling! I can't have people crying all over my page, now. *sigh* I... suppose it's about time I made peace with them....

*glances in the direction of Beth's page*







I'll... uh, do it later...

As it is Australia Day, I shall commemorate the occasion with a song:

"Once a jolly Angler camped in a sunlit wood
Under the shade of a really big tree
And she sang as she sat and polished all her fishhooks bright
You'll come a-waltzing, my fishhooks, with me!

Waltzing, my fishhooks, waltzing, my fishhooks
You'll come a-waltzing, my fishhooks, with me!
And she sang as she sat and polished all her fishhooks bright
You'll come a-waltzing, my fishhooks, with me!

Down came a feather, glinting in a shaft of sun
Up jumped the Angler and grabbed it with glee
And she sang as she pinned that feather to her precious scroll
You'll come a-waltzing, my mod's choice, with me!

Waltzing, my mod's choice, waltzing, my mod's choice
You'll come a-waltzing, my mod's choice, with me!
And she sang as she pinned that feather to her precious scroll
You'll come a-waltzing, my mod's choice, with me!

Up rode the Moderator, mounted on his thoroughbred
Down came the wood-elves: one, two, three
'Where's that jolly feather, you just stuck onto your scroll?
You'll come a-waltzing, my feather, with me!'

Waltzing, my feather, waltzing my feather
You'll come a-waltzing, my feather, with me!
And he sang as the archers slowly drew their arrows back
You'll come a-waltzing, my feather, with me!

Up jumped the Angler, and ran away into the woods
'You'll never catch me alive!' said she
And her cry may be heard as you pass by the Angler's page:
'Arrrggghhhh!!! You'll come a-waltzing, Pit of Darkness, with meeeee...!!!' "


(And what's this? I appear to be the 100TH MAIN PAGE COMMENTER!! YAY! I guess this means I get to write myself a story! YAY!)

*slips into room, unnoticed*
*slips a letter in Megan's pocket*
*slips out of room, unnoticed*
*Megan slips letter out of her pocket and reads silently*

I'm gathering a group of writers to try and make a collaborative fantasy novel. FUN!!
For more info, go here: http://www.angelfire.com/anime5/tanaka/the_fantasy_novel_of_our_time.html
BYE BYE!!

*Megan slips letter back into pocket and slips away into the distance*

  Comment From The Writer: *wanders back in and gives you a thumbs up* Well, I'm in, as you already know...

*looks around at new color scheme* Hmmm... interesting... but what happened to my scroll?! *sob*

What the bloody.... *waves vaguely*

Oye there, your replies are in PINK!!! Light, pale, horrifying pastel pink! I think I might die from the very shock.

*staggers backwards, but as Megan reaches towards her to deal the inevitable deathblow, reaches up and stabs her fiercely with huge golden fork*

*twists the trident cruelly, leaving great bloody gouge in Megan's middle, then steps back to watch as Megan falls lifeless to the floor*

*laughs maniacally, and carts corpse off to be burned in smelly green acid pools*

(Do you like the new layout?)

  Comment From The Writer: Would you prefer THIS pink instead? *cackles*



........



Comment From The Writer's (Once Again) Disembodied Voice: *groans* Not the acid again!!! I retract my previous comment about making peace. You are SOOOOO going to die...



(New layout: haven't made up my mind yet, but it's growing on me. :) I think I liked the papery texture of the old Wyvern's better, though.... now it kind of feels more like a dungeon than a wood... And I still miss my scroll!! *cries* Bring back the scroll!!

Oh yeah, did you notice that everyone elses main page counter got reset EXCEPT for mine? Wahahaha! I laugh at you all!)

*looks up at last comment*
*pokepoke*
*cackle*
Mine didn't get reset either...well they did, but now it's back again...muhahahahaha!!

Well i was here basically to tell you i've updated!! YAY!! And that i tried to email you, but it bounced *grr*

And also i expect updates *holds out hand*
C'mon you know you want to do it...go on! And more than what i've already read would be nice *puppy eyes*

I've got a broken foot, c'mon more i says!
[okay slight exaggeration, but i am pretty sure it shouldn't be that bruised and swollen...busted toe *sniffles*]
Now feel sorry for me and in your pity give me more FW.

*grins*

That'll be all ;)

Comment From The Writer: You tried to email me and it bounced? *frowns* Why did it do that? I only have one email address... If you used the email form on this page it's probably an elfy bug....

19-20 are in the queue AS I TYPE, but no new ones... YET! I'm about three-quarters through 21, and 22 still has a few plot problems that need working on *scrunches up face in annoyance* I probably should've worked on them while elfy was down, but I didn't, 'cause I'm a lazy slacko. But I feel sorry for you, and in my pity will go and work on FW as soon as I've finished writing this reply. ;)

ExCUSE me, but my counter didn't reset either!!

MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!

I have 99 comments there... if you're quick, you can be 100th main page commenter as well, to add to your 50th main page, and 100th commenter titles already. *grins*

  Comment From The Writer: Noooo... I didn't mean the comment counter, I meant the little page hit counter at the very bottom of the page. See, mine says '3200', and yours, the last time I was there, said '67'! Ah-HA!

Ohhhhh, that. Well, pfft. No matter. I shall... catch up!

Comment From The Writer: *snickers quietly to herself* Sure you will, sure you will...

*pokes his head through the window at Megan's last comment* Er, just for the record, your visitor counter says 'since January 1st'. Beth's says 'since February 2nd'. *disappears before she can throw acid or something at him*

Comment From The Writer: Actually, mine says 'since January 2001', and Beth's says 'since February 2nd' -- meaning Feb 2nd THIS YEAR, which is when the counter was reset.

I would throw something at you, but I don't seem to be very corporeal at the moment. *glares furiously at Beth*

You know i spoke too soon...as soon as i left that comment i went and checked and it had reset *grr* was over 10,000 i was all happyful with shear numbers...and now...gone *sniff*
*shrugs* ah well!
I've just hit a major milestone on main page comments...just 94 more and there will be one major party going on on my page!!
Everyone will be invited!! *grins*
Go on *nudgenudge* help the cause!
I have one week before my birthday...so i need to get 94 before then...*begins to plan*

And yes! My pity-me-routine had a sort of desired effect...i shall keep hobbling round your page until newness arrives...
*reao pops past and points out healed foot*
Shut up Reaper!
*bundles him into a convenient cupboard*
You didn't hear that...*hobbles*

Oh woe is me!

  Comment From The Writer: LOL! I'd be careful hobbling around this page if I were you... who knows WHAT could be lying around...

One week to your birthday, eh?

*pauses for a long moment*

*starts muttering under her breath and drumming her fingers on the desk*

I... MIGHT just be able to... if I work REALLY hard...

*walks in, hands in his pockets and a tune on his lips, obviously unfettered by the fact that he could float out, disembodied. He glares at you, as if delivering a silent message before walking off, shaking his head and muttering something under his breath*

--silent message--> Hurry up with the FW updates, will ya?

Comment From The Writer: *glares back at you* You stole my 200th comment from Beth's page! *sob* *sniff*

You like FW too? *brightens slightly* That's almost enough to make me forgive you....

*goes back to glaring* But not quite.

*gestures to a goblin, who rummages in cupboard and produces a small vial of black powder*

*the goblin tosses the Heavy Powder onto you, causing you to become so solid and heavy that you fall to the ground, unable to move*

*goblin sprinkles just a pinch on Megan, causing her to become corporeal once more*

*walks over to your paralysed form*

Heh heh. Not so light anymore, hmmmm?

*drags you with a great amount of straining and panting over to the Pit of Extreme Darkness, and pushes you in*

*scribbles a note and tosses it in after you: 'More FW coming in the next week!!'*

*'s immobile body floats up above the Pit of Darkness before a faint 'crack' is heard and he blinks, his wings flapping in a slow rhythm.*

More FW next week? It's enough to keep me alive!

*He smirks at Megan, and glides almost effortlessly over the pit and through the door, slapping what seems to be a piece of paper on her border/wall/whatever's keeping pests out of her page.*

*Megan looks at the piece of paper and it blows up, sending bits and pieces of her border/wall/whatever's keeping pests out of her page flying. On the floor, where her border/wall/whatever's keeping pests out of her page was, a picture of an airborne Gryffe - one of his many trademark signs.*

  Comment From The Writer: Clearly, it's NOT keeping pests out of my page...

*flies in, to all seeming to be a golden brown, tan, white, black and silver blur. He crashes into Megan, murmurs a hurried apology before drifting over to FW and descending, his fingers grabbing a copy of the latest before he grins gleefully and flies higher, just to keep out of her reach. He seems to lie down on an invisible levitating couch, fingers tracing the letters as he reads*

  Comment From The Writer: *glances anxiously at her comment counter* If YOU end up getting 300th comment, I'll...I'll... I don't know, but it won't be nice!

How far am I from 300th commenter?

Comment From The Writer: 298th!!! HURRY!!! GET IT BEFORE LIGHTFOOT DOES!!!

*bursts out laughing*

If I get 300th comment. Which is highly unlikely, as its rather rare for a 'newcomer' to your group of friends to get two 'th comment's in a row, isn't it?Would be cool, though..

*walks around, checking for updates before flying off*

  Comment From The Writer: 299!!! Oh no, oh no...

It is MINE!!!



MINE I tell you!

  Comment From The Writer: I'M SAVED!!! AHAHAHAHAHAHA.... *ahem* Yes. Well, congratulations: you just got 300th site commenter!

*shrugs and gestures to Beth*

There you go. I was going to make another comment right after my previous one, just to ensure that I get 300th commenter, but I thought, 'Next she'll throw a spear at me instead of a fishook.' :P

Comment From The Writer: Spears? *pauses* Now that's an idea....

*growls*
Don't you dare. I was nice enough to let 300th commenter title go.

*grins, eyes flashing menacingly*
Maybe...just maybe I could get 400th commenter. As a payback for that fishook.

Comment From The Writer: .... or perhaps a harpoon....

[this doesn't include you - mostly - because we're working on the fantasy novel remember? got three members already :)]
Dear friend,
I regret to inform you that due to my stories, The Cross, The Spirit Wars and my latest fantasy novel which is unnamed, I will be desolate on Wyvern's for maybe a year, even more! I will upload the crude chapters of the cross, though I tell you now, the chapters you read are the beginnings of BOOK TWO from the three books that make up the cross. BOOK ONE is about Ersanc, the peasant boy who stole the cross in the fist place. I finished book two and three, then decided to make the prologue in book two a story but that's beside the point. What I'm really here for is to say goodbye, and offer you my deepest apologies. I wrote you guys a poem:

Even though so much is wrong with the world,
I will not say that hope is lost,
Nor that the sun will fade and the moon will die,
Though the leaves may fall,
And spring be no more,
I will not say the day is done,
Nor will I bow to winter's icy claw.

Hope that the Cross and other assorted things don't engage me for too long. By next year, my library should be filled. So next year I'm going upload stacks of chapters from my novels until I can't upload anymore!!
--Alexander E. Brittan. :) (good luck with your writings!!)

Comment From The Writer: Three members? Excellent! I was going to come 'round and ask you about that... Nice poem, by the way :)

YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!!!!!!!!!!

WhatdoIget, huh? WhatdoIget, whatdoIget, whatdoIget??

  Comment From The Writer: Weeeellll.... since you wrote me a story, I think it's only fair that I write one for you... (I still owe Darian one too. Damn. Where is my inspiration when I need it???)

Now this is getting REALLY weird.... YOUR comment has wbr tags in it too!!!

*throws up his hands in defeat*

Plot all you want. I'm still going to be here for revenge if you set a gryffe on me or something.

  Comment From The Writer: Lol! Okay, okay, no more plotting! I'll just be satisfied with getting 1st comment on your page, and leave it at that. ;)

*surveys her suspiciously, fingering the tip of his dagger*

Deal.

*looks around, hope suddenly alight in his eyes*

Any FW?

Comment From The Writer: Nope. Still in the queue. *sighs* At least I got it in before they stopped accepting tickets...

*eyes your dagger*

*goes off to polish fishhooks. Just in case...*

*doesn't have the dagger anymore. It's with Beth.*
Hey, hey, truce?
*holds out his hand*
Where are you in the queue? I'm still at 2000-something.
*sighs in disappointment*

Comment From The Writer: *takes hand cautiously* Okay. Truce. But don't annoy me, or I may change my mind.... ;)

I'm in position 2193. A marginal improvement from position 2300-something, which I was in yesterday :)

*appears on Dy'gun, pulling the rein ever so slightly to bring himself and Dy'gun to a halt*
Here's a little announcement. Elfwoodians on my MSN list, might, and will, if they ask for it, receive my updates earlier than Elfwoodians who are not, as transferring files over MSN is faster than the ticket queue.
*gestures towards the gigantic pile of tickets*
Thank you for listening.
*eases Dy'gun into a trot and disappears from the page*

  Comment From The Writer: I don't think I've ever used MSN... What is it, and how do I get it?

By the way... sorry I haven't got around to commenting on any of your works yet (though I have read them!) My internet connection doesn't like me at the moment :(

Comment from the Cookie Whose Computer Is F***** Up So She Can't Login While Commenting:

*crawls out of a pile of books*

Duuh... what happened...? Is it a cease fire? A truce? Peace? What happened?

Will someone please explain...? I gotta study German, aufwiedersehen.

  Comment From The Writer: Vida!!! You're back!!! *coughs hurriedly* I mean, damn, not you again! I've made a truce with Lightfoot, but Fork Master is another matter.... *glances at Beth's page, eyes narrowing*

S'alright, and to MSN is..eh..an instant messenger. I have no idea what it stands for. I used to, though. If you want ter' get it...http://messenger.msn.com/

Comment From The Writer: Thanks! I'll be sure to check out that link.

*chuckles*
MSN stands for Microsoft Network and tis very useful for talking to peeps.

So how goes the queue...i'm glad i haven't got anything waiting at moment.

*sits and decides to wait*

Although i haven't actually commented yet have i? *ahem* Sorry...i will but i'm supposed to be writing now and am just distracting myself for a few minutes...i will be back soon though...especially with new chapter!

*decides to make things out of the ether*

Here...*hands you a fluffy-cloud-sheep-type-thing*

Meeeh! *fluffy-cloud-sheep-type-thing sprouts wings and proceeds to fly around your hut...banging into everything*

I never said it'd be good...*runs from the destruction*

  Comment From The Writer: *ducks as fluffy-cloud-sheep-type-thing glides over her head and collides with a shelf, knocking various dragon ornaments to the floor*

*groans* Oh no... not you, too! What is it with people destroying my page???

*reaches up and grabs fluffy-cloud-sheep-type-thing before it can do any more damage* Hmmmm.... this could actually be useful....

I am an obstacle in your path to absolute and ultimate power. AHA! AHAHAHA!

I feel so special.

*takes a bow and runs*

  Comment From The Writer: *sends fluffy-cloud-sheep-type-thing after Beth*

*fluffy-cloud-sheep-type-thing collides with Beth, knocking her to the ground*

*strolls over and grins down at her arch-nemesis*

*picks up a spear, twirls it, and stabs Beth in the back*

Revenge. Is mine.

It was intended to destroy your page...it just has that effect...

*pulls down a cumulo-nimbus cloud* (look when you write a story about living about the clouds, you'll know all the names too!)

*sits down*

Now this should be even more useful than the fluffy-cloud-type-sheep thing...

*hmms to self in Rolf Harris can-you-tell-what-it-is-yet type way*

Taa dah!

*holds out hand*

*standing on it, looking major mean is the black-storm-ram-of-doom...chewing on what appears to be a lightening bolt*

Now B-Srod (black-storm-ram-of-doom) be good for Megan, and protect the page.

MEEEEEHHH! *Rumble of thunder*

;) there what with him and dizzy the fluffy-cloud-sheep-type-thing you shall *hopefully* protect the page from too much damage...or even release them into the fork master wilds...to wreak havoc there instead ;)

  Comment From The Writer: *gasps* Oh Becca... I LOVE HIM!!! HE'S AWESOME!!!

*hugs Becca* *hugs li'l B-Srod* *leaps back as she gets zapped*

HAHAHAHAHA!! Fantastic!!!

She meant was *NOT* supposed to destroy your page, meeeeh.

  Comment From The Writer: Oh. Thank goodness for that, you had me worried for a second... heheh.

Doing okay? How's war? Who's winning?

By the way... have you seen a movie "Walker"? Just occurred to me. That's maybe the most absurd action/western movie I've ever seen.

  Comment From The Writer: I'm doing remarkably well, actually: I just got a Black Storm Ram of Doom from Becca, another Mod's Choice, AND I ran Fork Master through with a spear! Now, if only my computer would work properly, life'd be grand! (Oh... and I'M winning, of course! Muahahaha ;) )

Walker? Hmmm... I don't think I have... Is it any good for laugh value, or is it just plain bad?

YOU GOT MOD'S CHOICE!!!!! (yes, you do know me. ^_^) CONGRAAAAAAAAATULATIONS!!!!!! :D :D

Comment From The Writer: Do I??? Okay... I'll take your word for it! Yes, another Mod's Choice!! Whoohoo!!!

*pets B-Srod whilst wearing golden gloves*

(i think it's a really bad conductor *is dredging up ancient chemistry...so is most likely wrong*)

Cute ain't he *grins*

Oh i know why i was here...CONGRATS ON ANOTHER MOD'S CHOICE!!!!

Is that four now? Or more? Eep you're catching up with me...but then i cheat because i update more than the rest of you :p

*watches fluffy-cloud-sheep-type-thing fly straight into B-Srod*
*winces at miny explosion*
*watches as a now frazzled-cloud-sheep-type-thing emerges*

Nice to see he is useful for somethings ;) *ducks frazzle*

  Comment From The Writer: Thank you! Yes, that's the fourth! Whoooo!! *watches B-Srod wandering around electrocuting things happily*

Bad? It's amazing! It's... absurd comedy, bloodthirsty action and neobarbarism, all in one. It's honestly the best western I've ever seen (the best of all three of them). No, really, it's good. It's not your ordinary western. It's... Walker. All your base are belong to us.

Comment From The Writer: Really? Cool! I'll have a look for it the next time I'm at the video store...

*ducks as B-Srod zooms past, nearly knocking his head off*
Nice..eh..thing.
*walks around for a minute before slumping onto a couch, a thoughtful look on his face*

Comment From The Writer: It's not a THING, it's a Black Storm Ram of DOOM. *looks around her page in some surprise* I was away for three whole days, and my page is still intact!! Whoohoo!!

*notices the various overturned objects and scorch marks on the walls caused by an overenthusiastic B-Srod*

Eh... reasonably intact.

*the ghost of the Fork Master storms in*

*points furiously at the Angler*

KUSH!!!

*walks out*

  Comment From The Writer: Yes, I agree. Spears are quite effective, aren't they? I should use them more often...

*stares at the ghost of the Fork Master, bewildered and unfettered by the over-active B-Srod*
Kush?Right.

  Comment From The Writer: *chucks her suitcase on the bed and wanders over to the couch, sitting down beside Lightfoot*

Do you think I've finally driven her insane, or should I try harder?

Hiya, just thought i'd drop by and let u know i linked you up to my page because i really enjoyed your stories! Ferian's winter especially is amazing - there's so much imagination and originality behind it!
Anyways, was just hoping the link is cool with you? Drop a line some time!

  Comment From The Writer: Yeah, sure it's cool with me! I am honoured, thank you! I'll repay the favour with a visit as soon as I can!

WOOT! The Extranet is back! Yay! *dances happily as well as ghosts can*

Wait.

Why am I on YOUR page? Yeah, that's right. Your page doesn't deserve my ghostly presence.

*watches B-Srod go through her insubstantial stomach* Fascinating. *leaves*

  Comment From The Writer: .........

PLEASE NOT THAT THE SPECIAL IS NOW UP AND AVAILABLE FOR READING. PLEASE TRY TO FIND IT ON THIS WRITER'S PAGE UNDER THE NAME "I KNOW THAT I DON'T KNOW ANYTHING". THANK YOU!

z o o o o o o m ! ! !

  Comment From The Writer: WHOOHOOOO!!!

I guess I never really thanked you for the beautiful link you gave me... thanks. I didn't realise you liked my work that much. Maybe I shall try and take Ferrian's Winter up again.

Haha! That's the cheesiest maybe today! Let's see how far I can get during the three hours that remain!

Waru!

  Comment From The Writer: My fault for not coming 'round and telling you so! But I meant what I said. Your work really is fantastic.

C'mon, guys... peace! Do you even know what started this ungodly war?

OF COURSE we do!! It was.... Ashley N. Hanna! She called us both goobers, then Megan said I started it. So I shoved her into my lovely Pit of Extreme Darkness and mopped up her remains with a squeegee and stuck them in a bucket!

SEE?!?! It was all HER fault!

*gives the Angler a burning glare*

And now, thanks to HER, I'm a freaking GHOST!
I'M INSUBSTANTIAL, DAMMIT!!

Comment From The Writer: MY fault??? *points accusingly at Fork Master* YOU poked ME with FORKS!! And you put me in the DISHWASHER!! That was inexcusable, that was! *pauses* Where is Ashley, anyway? I haven't heard from her since.... well, since she called us both goobers, actually. I wonder if she realises the destruction she's caused? :)

What's the matter? You don't like being a ghost? *sniggers* Awwww.... well, we can't have you suffering an unhappy afterlife, now can we? *grins slyly*

*walks over to the bookshelf and pulls out a large, black, leather-bound book with a gold title: 'Exorcism For Beginners'*

*turns to the first page and begins to read....*

You spelled 'Exorcism' wrong, by the way.

*smirks and sidles away...*

(...to check the dictionary in case she's wrong as well)

Comment From The Writer: *looks up from her reading and glares at you darkly*

*puts down book and grabs a dictionary, flicking to the appropriate page*

*prolonged pause*

*carefully picks out 's' with fishhook and replaces it with a 'c'*

*gives you another, extremely dark look and resumes reading*

*should be writing homework, but isn't, should be studying Latin, but isn't, should be writing essay for literature class to be handed in on Thursday, but ISN'T -> who wants to read the Bible anyway?*

You spelled exorcism wrong? How can you spell exorcism wrong?! It's such an easy word even I can't do it...

*stares at map* You live in Australia? Gosh, never noticed that before... ooh, I feel a song coming up!

*bell chime*
*strong guitair accords*
*music starts playing*

(A one... a two... a one two three!)

When the summer sun is shining
On Australia's happy land,
Round countless fires and strange attires
In many sullen bands
Of blond Australians watching,
The lunch go up in flames,
By the smoke and the smell you can plainly tell
That it's barbie time again!

(all together now, here comes the chorus!)
When the steaks are burning fiercly,
When the smoke gets in yer eyes,
When the snags all taste like fried toothpaste
And yer mouth is full of flies,
It's a national institution,
It's Australian through and through
So come on mates, and grab yer plates
Let's have a barbecue!

The Scotts eat lots of haggis,
The French eat snails and frongs
The Greeks go crackers over their moussakas,
And the Chinese love hot dogs.
The Welshmen love to have a leek,
The Irish like their stew,
But you just can't beat the half-cooked meat
At an Aussie barbecue!

When the... etc.

There's flies stuck to the margarine,
The bread has gone rock hard,
The kids are fighting, and the mossies are biting,
Who forgot the Aeroguard?
There's bullants in the esky and the beer is running out,
And what you saw in Mum's coleslaw,
You just don't think about

(everybody now!)
When the... etc.

And when the barbie's over,
And your homeward way you went
With a queasy tummy on the family dunny,
Many lonely hours you've spent.
You might find yourself reflecting
Like many often do,
Come rain or shine
That's the bloody last time
That you'll have a bar-b-q

(the last time, c'mon!)
When the steaks are burning fiercly,
When the smoke gets in yer eyes,
When the snags all taste like fried toothpaste
And yer mouth is full of flies,
It's a national institution,
It's Australian through and through
So come on mates, and grab yer plates
Let's have a barbecue!

.... eheheheh.... 'tis better w/ the music

  Comment From The Writer: LMAO!! Brilliant! That should be our national anthem, lol! (It goes to the tune of 'When Irish Eyes Are Smiling,' right?) Heheheh, isn't Australia great? ;D

It does. And, actually, from what I've heard, you Aussies got to choose your anthemn, and one of three avaiblabe for the picking was this song!!! =)

  Comment From The Writer: If only!!! Lol!! Yes, we did get to vote for our anthem, but - unfortunately - this wasn't one of the final choices. There were four songs to choose from in the final national poll: 'Advance Australia Fair', 'Waltzing Matilda', 'God Save the Queen', and 'Song of Australia'. Personally, I think 'Waltzing Matilda' is hands down the best out of those. Too bad I hadn't been born yet! *sigh* Now we're stuck with 'Our home is girt by sea'....

Oh, and you know how I was planning on writing out the war into a story? Well, I finally got around to starting it, and I was wondering what colour hair you have. Or if I should maybe choose a random colour.
Sorry, you don't get to choose your name, heheh. I already decided.

(Yes, Vida, you're in it too. ^_^)

Heehee! This is fun!

Comment From The Writer: I don't know whether to feel excitement or trepidation.... Should be fun though. :) My hair? At the moment, it's just above shoulder-length, copper with blond streaks. :)

Guess what???

I UPDATED!! WOOT!

  Comment From The Writer: Updates!! YAY!!

I feel like ranting.


RANT!!

  Comment From The Writer: I feel like a banana. Want one? *offers you a banana, grinning*

I pasted a couple poems to me formerscroll, yusyus. And somehow two people I'd never seen before managed to comment before anyone I know. Hehehe. :d

  Comment From The Writer: Poems!! YAY!!

I GOT MY BRACES OFF!!!

wh00t!

  Comment From The Writer: *cheers* Feels great, doesn't it? I had braces a few years ago. Ugh. Never. Again. But you wait until you get into your twenties and your wisdom teeth start coming through... Just hope that you don't have to have surgery to get them out, like I do. I'm trying not to freak out about it, 'cause I've never been into hospital before. For anything. Ever. And I REALLY, REALLY don't like hospitals. I'm dreading the 25th of March...

*stares at offered banana almost remorsefully.... almost*

I can't eat food, remember? *jabs a finger into her insubstantial arm*

*looks at above comment and starts laughing hysterically. REALLY hard*

HAAAAAAAAAAAAA HAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!

Megan has to go to the HOSPITAL!!! Oh, oh, and she HATES medical stuff! Remember that picture of the needle? The one I stuck up on your wall, that you cruelly tore down and burned?

This is HILARIOUS!!

*floats off, still chuckling*

  Comment From The Writer: OH SHUT UP!!! It's NOT funny, all right?! This is serious! And yes, I DO remember that needle, and I remember thinking at the time what an eerie coincidence it was...

I'm going to find a way to bring you back to life so I can kill you again. In a REALLY gruesome way.

So, which creature or character did you like best in Spirited Away? I would almost side with Haku, especially when he's a dragon, if there weren't the bearded man with many arms. You don't watch a lot of Miyazaki movies do you? Me, I can barely remember seeing Porco Rosso when I was still small enough to fit under my Batman cape - now it barely covers my shoulders. Oh dear.

  Comment From The Writer: Oh, definitely Haku! Yes, he was gorgeous. And those little black things that carried the coal! I loved them....

No, I don't unfortunately. I really like Japanese anime, although I'll admit that I don't know very much about it. I haven't seen many, because they're hard to get where I live. Occasionally one will be shown on SBS (an independant TV channel which plays mostly foreign stuff), but not often. I have seen Porco Rosso, although it was a while ago.

*saunters in with her hands in her pockets*

I decided to reincarnate myself as an early birthday present. The fact that my birthday isn't until September is completely irrelevant.

*chucks a bomb and disappears in a cloud of puffy pumpkin smoke*

  Comment From The Writer: *picks herself up from the rubble, dazed and coughing* So, you've *cough* reincarnated yourself. Prepare to *coughcough* die again!!

*wanders... er, floats in, looking with interest at your bio*

Interesting... for some reason, it reminds me of my own. Hmm. *smiles speculatively*

I was just wandering... I mean, floating by, and wondering what happened to all the stars that were dangling about that list. There WERE four of them... what happened?

  Comment From The Writer: Eh? Wha...? What do you mean, 'what happened to them'?? *starts to panic*

*rushes over to her list and grabs it*

*sighs in relief*

*glares at you* Are you trying to give me a heart attack or something??

Hmmm... gibbly... they're back now. *is confuzzled*

Comment From The Writer: *peers at you curiously* Are you sure you're feeling all right? You haven't been eating bananas again, have you? Oh, wait... you can't eat food, can you! HAAAA HAHAHA!

Heh. Don't worry, I don't know that much about anime either. I just like to talk about things I'm oblivious of.

Hm. Other than that, I'm thinking of becoming a moderator. Do you think I've got the looks for the job?

  Comment From The Writer: *considers* You could brush your hair, for a start. And sit up straight. And look Intimidating. And get some blood red eye-contacts with skulls over the irises. And some flowy, imperial robes. And a Staff of Judgement. Oh, and a pet crocodile to sit on your lap and eat rejected tickets and spit them back at their owners. Um. I didn't say that. *goes to hide behind her couch in case any real mods were listening*

No, seriously, I think you'd make a great mod!

*wanders in aimlessly* Hmm...

I have come here before. Yes, I have. I recognise the fishhooks.

But have I commented? I do not know. Crazy mind wont let crazy memory remember.

You have sooooo many stories!!! *is overwhelmed* I want to read all!!! But not enough time...hmm...yes...tomorrow....

Well, I'll have to settle with only one or two for now. Shopping trip awaits. You are officially on my list of people with stories I must read. *nods very seriously* I will be back!!!

  Comment From The Writer: Thank you! Heh, yeah, I know my list is rather long... most of what isn't Ferrian's Winter is poetry, and a couple of other shorter stories. Thanks so much for putting me on your list!

What kind of coffin do you want?

  Comment From The Writer: *points a furious finger at you, trying to speak but no words seem to be coming out*

You... you...!!! LOOK WHAT YOU'VE DONE!!! Now we're BOTH ghosts!!!!

Thanks for the tips... I've got to practice my evilmanslaughter still, though. I doubt they'd let me into Modding business if I can only say "uh, haha" instead of a proper "BUHHAHAHAHAHAAA!"

hah! hah! hah! (a laughing frank, as depicted by Yaruk Khan in The Shadow of the Vulture)

  Comment From The Writer: Oh, yes! The evil laugh! Can't be a Mod without a seriously evil laugh...

*smirks* Isn't it great?

  Comment From The Writer: *glares* No, it isn't!!! I'm NEVER eating ANYTHING from your page AGAIN!!!

HA HAAA!

That's 'cause you'll never be ABLE to!! AHAHAHAHAHA!

  Comment From The Writer: You're going to pay for this!!

Look what I found! *holds up a soul shaped vaguely like a Cookie* My newest aquisition. And so very useful... *wraps soul into shadowstaff and revives Megan* So nice, isn't it, to be revived by the soul of your enemy? So wonderfully ironic...

  Comment From The Writer: *pokes herself, astonished and thrilled to find that she is completely solid*

I'm alive!! I'm ALIVE!! I'M ALIVE!! I'M ALIVE!! YEEEEEHOOOOOOO!!! THE ANGLER LIVES!!!! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

Wazza, wazza, wazza! He stole my soul! What am I gonna do? What are you going to do about it? I am soulless! AAARGH!!!!!

*sees B-Srod*

Oooh, what a nice, fluffy sheep... *patts ram* *ram bees with affection*

Nice, truly nice animal... *drool*

*takes out a huge spear, thrusts it in B-Srod's heart, shaves its fleece off and makes a lovely cardigan*

*sticks the B-Srod on a thingy and roasts it on the fire*

*eats* Mmm... mutton... *burp*

Is it true that Australia rides on the back of a sheep? Well, certainly not this sheep! (ahahaha!!!!)

  Comment From The Writer: *jubilation is cut short as she stares at Cookie in absolute disbelief and horror*

B-SROD!!!!!!

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!

*wails at the top of her lungs*

Y-you... you ATE him!!! You ate my poor, beautiful li'l Storm Ram of Doom!!!!

I'm going to think of something horribly, horribly, horribly, horribly, horribly, horribly, evilly, EVIL to do to you!!!

*sobs* *cries* *wails again*

*sniff* Don't be ridiculous! How would it breathe underwater? And where would it put Tasmania?

Australia on the back of a sheep? You must have mighty big sheep down there, then!

  Comment From The Writer: Oh, yeah, everything's big down here. Want proof? Go here! *grins*

Oh, yes, the illustration of your poem. I really want to do it soon, but I can't seem to find a good reference picture for the unicorn. I have troubles with drawing equines. Just does not work. I will try, though. I will try.

  Comment From The Writer: Hey, no problem! Take your time!

*toddles in wearing ghostly earplugs, pushing her loud-music-playing LaZ Boy*

*shoves it into the middle of the floor*

*waves, and toddles out*

*as Megan goes to inspect LaZ Boy, a ghostly bomb appears... (da da da DUMMMM)*

Comment From The Writer: AAAAAAARRRRRGGGH!!! *clamps her hands tightly over her ears, her curses drowned out by the blaring music*

*hurries over to the LaZ Boy to try and find some way of turning it off....*

*groans*

Ohhhhhhhh noooooo, not agai-- *BLAAAAAAAAAAAMMMMM!!!!!!*

Question- Would you prefer it in pen or coloured pencils? I can't decide. I could colour it with my new prismacolours, with my new knowledge of blending and how to properly get darks without using black and making it yucky. But pen would be cool too. I have the unicorn, mermaid, fairies, and almost all of the centaur done! But it's on bigger paper then I can scan in at once, and I don't have an editing program yet, so even when I finish, it won't be up for a bit. Maybe it'll be up in bits, but not full.

So that's my news for today!! Enjoy!

Comment From The Writer's Ghost: Eh? What? You'll have to speak up, I can't hear anything except this awful ringing noise....

Pen or coloured pencils? Oooooh, both sound cool! Hmmmm.... okay, coloured pencils then! :)

And Happy Easter to you too! One more day of school, then a 4 day weekend!!! PARTYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  Comment From The Writer: And chocolate.... lots 'n lots of choooocolaaaaate....

Oh yeah.... if anyone cares to know, there's a comment title coming up....

*appears*
Hello.
*grins*
Haven't been on your page much..
*points to list of stories*
Where. Is. Ferrian's. WINTER?!!
*smiles unnervingly once more before walking away*

Comment From The Writer's Ghost: *hides behind her couch, clutching her ghost spear protectively* Y-y-y-you c-c-cut o-off m-m-my h-h-head... *whimpers*

F-F-F-Ferrian's W-W-W-Winter??? *shrinks lower behind her couch*

U-u-u-u-ummmm...???

*grabs a ghostly pen and paper and starts scribbling desperately* I'm w-working on it r-r-right now!!!

*gives you an unconvincing smile*

*pauses*

B-but... I'm working on M-M-Mercury III as well, so it'll still be a... a little while y-yet....

I have returned....

*The whisper creeps out of the shadows and envelopes the room in icy darkness*

*A chill creeps up the Angler's back as she realizes she is not alone. Something... somebody is out there...*

*But who could it be? She sees nothing, only senses the being's approach*

*Suddenly, a cry escapes her lips as she feels an ice-cold aura slowly surrounding her, choking her. She is paralyzed with fear, unable to move a muscle.*

I will get you for this..... just you wait....

....and somebody had better reincarnate me this time.... OR ELSE!

You have not defeated me yet...

  Comment From The Writer's Ghost: *gulps*

....Do you mind fixing that first '/i' tag?. Thank you.

Don't worry, I'm leaving. *icy presence fades, and Angler is left alone on her page*

Comment From The Writer's Ghost: *shivering, the Angler edges closer to the fireplace, clutching her ghost spear tightly to her chest and staring anxiously into the shadows flickering around her hut*

*grins*
Hey, Fork Master. Angler's scared of me.
*laughs softly, fingering his dagger absently*

  Comment From The Writer: Stay away from me!!

*an ominous chuckle echoes out of the shadows*

  Comment From The Writer: .... and that goes for you, too!!

*chucks a large glass jar of jam at Jake's head*

  Comment From The Writer: *laughs*

*catches the jar, moving back to gain balance before throwing it back*
Basketball. :P
*grins at Emberice*
You should try tormenting her. Its fun.

  Comment From The Writer: Tormenting the Angler is not fun.

*a thought occurs*

*pulls out a ghostly watch on a chain, and waves it slowly in front of your face*

You do not enjoy tormenting the Angler. Tormenting the Angler is NOT fun. You do not enjoy tormenting the Angler....

*scary, omnious thunder roll*

*lightning lights up the sky*

*a shower of acid rain falls down and melts all your furniture*

*the clouds part, and a familiar face, full of anger, wearing a halo of some kind peers down at you*

*sneer* Hello, Megan... I wish to thank you for killing me utterly, for without you I couldn't have achieved what I am now. And what am I now, you ask? I have upgraded to a higher level of existance.

Oh yes.

I am a GODDESS.

And there's nothing you can do about it, mate. *sneer*

*Death appears and swishes his scythe*

*you scream, and watch as my soul returns to its rightful owner*

Aaah... that's better. But, I fear that now you have no body, and no soul, what are you?

Nothing?

Precisely.

Happy Easter... MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!

*clouds come together again, and a terrible storm, a monsun terrorises your domain*

  Comment From Er... Nothing?? This.... is bad....

You will regret this.

You WILL regret this.

*clouds part, followed by scary lightning*

Would you mind fixing that HTML? Thank you very much. I'll leave, don't you worry. I'll just stick around for a while and see how scared are you.

*shadows at the corners of the hut move and change into a dragon*

*cold sweat runs down your forehead*

Ahaha. Be afraid.

Comment From Nothing: I thought I didn't have a forehead?

*nothingness gestures at the shadow dragon* (Don't ask me how nothingness can gesture. It just did, alright?)

Emberice, shadows are your forte, aren't they?

*dodges jar, watching it smash on the ground* Tormenting her? I threw that jar at you in the first place because I'm her ALLY. Have you not read the bio?

Anywho, Megan, your poem is up. :D

Comment From Nothing: *stares dismally at the jam splattered all over the floor, completely ignoring the puddles of acid and the fact that her hut has been reduced to a pile of splintered sticks*

Jam is so hard to clean up....

This is comment #390 overall, if anyone was wondering. :)

Oh yes indeed...shadow magic is so fun. :p Strangely enough though, that particular one WASN'T me........ ..... .....
I shall be leaving now. Shadow critters can get nasty.

  Comment From The Writer: Wait... WAIT!! Don't leave this thing here with me!! I MEANT, could you get rid of it!! *looks at the dragon* Oh... never mind, I just had an idea...

*the nothingness of the Angler devours the shadow dragon, stealing its soul*

*reincarnates herself with much lightning and thunder and scary music, etc, etc....*

*scratches... head? in puzzlement*

I'm so confused. So... if I'm nothing...

...and you're nothing...

...how EXACTLY are we supposed to be fighting this war?

With NOTHING????

Comment From The Writer: .........



*lets out a long sigh*

I'm going to REGRET this, I just know I am.... But you're right. There cannot be a war with NOTHING....

*rummages in her cupboard for the Sword of Healing, and glances around thoughtfully*

Hmmm, I need a soul.... *eyes fall upon the smashed jar of jam*

*shrugs* It'll do...

*places the Sword over the killed jam and gathers its soul*

*stabs the Sword into the disembodied Fork Master*

*Fork Master is reincarnated with much lightning and thunder and scary music, etc, etc...*

My price for this is the war story. Now that you are alive, you have no more excuses. Finish it. Now.

And you'd BETTER be grateful. *sniff*

*stares at Megan in disbelief*

*wiggles her fingers in front of her face*


Y-you.... you.... *eyes narrow*





.... YOU GAVE ME A JAM SOUL??!!?!?!?????

UNBELIEVABLE!!!!!!

You reincarnated ME with the soul of a jar of JAM...

I'LL GET YOU FOR THIS!!!

*snatches up fork and storms away*


(in other words... Thank you SO much, I'm really really grateful to have my body back. Mwa ha ha...)

  Comment From The Writer: *is laughing incredibly hard*

*stands by silently in the shadows, waiting patiently for the reincarnations to stop*
You still owe us Ferrian's Winter.
*points out, a smirk crossing his face*

  Comment From The Writer: I know, I know, it's coming, I promise! Nearly finished!! I would've had it done by now, but I got on a really good roll with Merc III... I'll DEFINITELY submit the ticket for 22 this week, probably in the next two or three days.

Wow u got a huge amount of stories 8-O *amazed*
well i just finished reading a few of your poems, which i found quite amazing... I wish we had these 2 study at school, back when we had to learn poems...

  Comment From The Writer: Awww, thank you, that's an awesome thing to say.

*you hear the sound of rushing wind*
Next second...
*you find yourself on the floor, choking on a particularly large feather*
*beams at Megan*
Chapter 22? My internet was just repaired, elfwood's back up and chapter 22's out?Best day ever.
*disappears to go read chapter 22*

  Comment From The Writer: *coughcough*

*crosses fingers*
Hopefully..this is comment number 400...

Comment From The Writer: *mutters* It was bound to happen eventually...

Yes, this is comment #400. Congratulations. *grins* You can have a story if you want, but you'll have to wait a long time for it. A loooong time. I still have Beth's to write yet, and I haven't even start--*coughcough* Uh, IhavetobegoingIhavechapter23tofinish...

*runs*

*wanders in whistling*
*opens bag*
*reveals cumulo nimbus clouds inside*
The funny thing about storm rams is that they technically can't be eaten...they are after all just clouds.
*whirls hands about*
*lightning flashes*
*Thunder crashes*
They can also be made real quick.
*presents a black ball of CN clouds*
*pulls out the legs*
*adds a head*
*snags some cirrus for wings*
*Plugs him into the mains for recharging*
Taadaah!
Black Storm Ram of Doom part 2! or B-Srod2 or B-Srod reloaded, whichever you wanna use ;)

*snags some more cirrus*
*while waiting for chapter twenty three messes about a bit*
Taadaah!
*opens hand where a little wispy dragon is sitting, blowing cloud rings*
This is Ditz, she's a little spacey, after all she is made from high clouds. She can't be eaten, because basically she'll just disintegrate - so she shall live forever...well ish you can destroy her but i'm not telling you how because this lot'll do it straight away.
She's not evil - just dim and has a habit of distructing things with solar power - by accident...
well that's our excuse ;)
*hands over new cloud creations*
Be nice to them this time...and if they find sticky ends let me know...

  Comment From The Writer: I LOVE YOU FOREVER!!!!!!!

*takes her new pets and goes off to cry again -- with happiness this time*

*stares at new pets and goes deathly pale*

(Deathly pale... get it? Ahahaha! Ha ha... ha... okay, okay, not funny.)

*runs*

Comment From The Writer: *rolls eyes* And I thought my jokes were lame *cough*

*pops back in*

Oh yeah...


YOU.


STOLE.


MY.


MUSE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

HTML please and thank you. Grrrr.... DON'T YOU DARE MAKE IT ANY SMALLER!!!!

  Comment From The Writer: *sniggers evilly*

*holds up a cage with a little silvery blue dragon inside*

*pokes dragon with her spear*

No wonder I've been getting so much work done, with TWO muses to help me!

MUAHAHAHA!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

YOUR MUSE IS MINE!!!!!!

*sigh* Much as I want more FW and Merc III, there is the war story to think about....maybe you should give it back.........NAH! FW is much more important. Write! Write!! *ahem* *is waiting not-so-patiently*

Comment From The Writer: *frowns at her Terrible Muse Cage of Doom* Hmmm, it doesn't seem to be working quite as well as it was a few days ago.... Maybe I killed it?

*suddenly clutches the cage in panic*

No!! NO!!! It can't die!!! If Beth's muse dies, I'll NEVER get the war story!!!!

*starts shaking the cage vigorously* LIVE!!! LIVE, YOU CURSED THING!!!!!

*in the background, Megan's own muse -- a little angel with rainbow-coloured wings -- quickly hides a vial labelled 'Poison' behind her back and tries to look nonchalant*

*sneeks into Megan's little part of the woods, and does so VERY sneakily!*

*peers around great big tree*

*spies Megan's muse (with all this fighting for Beth's muse going on, Megan seems to have forgotten to protect her own. So while Beth's is locked up in a cage in the tallest branch of the tallest tree, Megan's is clear out in the open)*

*creeps up slowly, then pounces*

*She blindfolds and gags the muse, presently in the form of a purple flying monkey, ties the wings down, tucks the muse under her arm like a football, and sneakily sneeks away again, unnoticed. The Angler does not seem to be home at the present time.*

*returns stealthily to where she came from*

*cackles* Muahahaha...the muse is in MY possesion now! I shall hide it better than anything has been hid before! Muahahhahaha....!"

Comment From The Writer: *sits down at her computer to write chapter 24*

*stares at the screen for long minutes, her mind as blank as the page*

*looks around in desperation, but cannot find inspiration anywhere*

My muse... Where is my muse???!!

MY MUSE IS GONE!!!!!

*sneaks off following Kelly* *shadowbinds her and takes back Megan's angel* *uses rest of poison to concoct an antidote* *strolls back to Megan's page* There you go. A muse and an antidote, just so we know we'll get the war story EVENTUALLY. Oh right....*puts up small shadow shield around Megan's muse* There, ideas can come out, but hands can't get in. :p And don't touch it, or it'll shock you.

Comment From The Writer: *watches Darian return her muse with great relief* Thank you!!! That was almost a disaster!!

*eyes narrow in Kelly's direction* She tried to steal my muse. My precious, precious MUSE!!! She will pay for that, precious. Yes, yes, she will pay....

*storms in, riding a fire chariot*

You dare, you dare TOUCH my sock drawer, you dare INSULT me, you, moreover, dare to BIND ME into my own drawer! Well, here's what I have to say about that, ma'am:

I SHALL SMITE THEE WITH RIGHTEOUS ANGER, MEGAN.

hmtl please and thank you.

*sees B-Srod revisited* I say... nifty things, aren't they? Very useful, eh? Ahahaha... *zapps the ram*

*it is now a harmless, defenceless cirrus that goes up into the sky*

Wee, what a cute ickle dwagon-poo... *cuddles dragon, and it purrs* She seems to like me, no? *feeds dragon with fire and ushers it at you*

*the dragon torches you and evaporates*

Now, I'm not sure if your pets are gone for good, but for some time. And that's enough for me, because I have actually grown to like this war thing. Hee. Cheerio.

*rides away to Beth's page*

Comment From The Writer's Ghost: *WAILS* VEEEE-DAAAAHHH!!! I just got B-Srod BAAAACK!!! And now I'm a ghost AGAAAAAIIIN!!!!

*yells every insult that hasn't been invented yet after you until she runs out of non-breath*

*trails back*

Oh. Wait a moment. Wait a teensy-weensy, eenie-weenie second.

My muse said she was going to a beauty-spa in Tunisia to get rid of her thinking wrinkles. But she has been gone for a month now. And she DOESN'T HAVE WRINKLES. What did you do to her?

*ahem* Muse is in shape of a fat black python with white stripes on her belly. Haven't seen her, have you? *peers into Terrible Muse Cage of Doom* 'Cause if she's in there, you're in bigger trouble than I thought.

  Comment From The Writer: I tortured her with an iron.

*sniggers*

hehe... I like a good war, but I mean really! You people attacking muses when its really the people you want. Also, there should really be a marshal to police this sort of thing. I'm, thinking Robo-cop, only bigger and faster. Always thought rob-cop was too slow.... 8p

  Comment From The Writer: A marshal? *considers* I think it might last about five minutes....

*looks around*

where's chapter 23?? 8)

  Comment From The Writer: It's coming, just give me a few more days....

Now Darian, see what you're doing now? You're meddling with time! I DID get back to my page safely, with no shadowbinds or taking back of the muse. But you must've turned back time to do that, without my knowledge!! Boy am I confused! Timebending is complicated stuff. So, Megan is in control of both muses again? Hmm...*concocts evil plan*

Comment From The Writer: I am? Oh yeah, I am, aren't I! Sweet! And Vida's as well. HAHAHA now I have THREE MUSES!!!

>=) Not for long!!!!

You see, Ms. Ghost of the Angler, ghostliness comes with a certain... *cough* INSUBSTANTIAL price.

So I'll just be taking my muse... thank you.

*picks up poor, poisoned muse and trundles out the door*

Guess I'd better update sometime then, eh?

  Comment From The Writer's Ghost: *glares at you in silence for a long moment*







Fine.

Fine, take it then. It wasn't working for me anymore anyway, it was half dead. *sniffs indignantly* Besides, I still have Cookie's... *eyes her Terrible Muse Cage of Doom and puts a Ghost Curse on it, so that if anyone dares touch it again they will DIE.

HA!! Let's see her get her precious python back now!!

(And yes, YOU HAD BETTER UPDATE SOON!!!)

It's not timebending, it's common courtesy. You do something, your opponent responds.

Comment From The Writer: Yes, indeed. And it would seem that this Angler has a lot of responding to do... *glares at everyone except Darian. Oh, and John. And Alex. And Becca*

*enters room nonchalantly, and casually walks to Terrible Muse Cage of Doom*

I don't think I'll need my muse again. You can keep her. People don't read my stories as it is, so I needn't write more, dontcher know.

May the Force be with you.

*evaporates*

Comment From The Writer: *shrugs* Fine with me. The more muses the better, I say. And what do you mean, no-one reads your stories?? I read your stories! AND I happen to like them! What, don't I count??? Well, gee, thanks, I'm sure.

*popps back*

Reincarnation is NOT a flavour. No it isn't. No I won't listen to excuses nor pathetic imaginary truths. Check the dictionary, and you will see it is NOT a flavour.

But death's a flavour, though.

*stuffs your mouth with death-flavoured cake*

*you die*

There. See? Never joke a joker, bake a baker, god a god or whatever a whatever. Have a happy second/third/n afterlife. Whee.

  Comment From The Writer's Ghost: ......

And so is vengeance. It's best served cold, as I recall.

So, how's death suiting you?*grins*

Comment From The Writer's Ghost:

Hmm... you're dead again.

HA HA HAAAA!!!

  Comment From The Writer's Ghost: That's right, Fork Master. Laugh while you still can....

*pauses*

*keeps pausing*

*pauses even more*

*eventually, a small, slightly strangled whine can be heard as Megan glances at her comment counter*

Comment #200

YEAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!

WHOOOOHOOOO!!! It seems like such a long time since I got a comment title. YAY!!!!!!! ^_^

Comment From The Writer: Yeah, yeah. Good for you.

First off... here *dumps a huge sack of clouds by your feet*
This way should B-Srod or any of the others meet a less than savoury end, you can restore them. They will regenerate, but they might lose a little of the float power - but not now!!
Secondly - Muses...
Right closest thing i have to a muse (apart from just my usual characters - hey you can draw Reao ^_^) Umm... is Shaiel, my starry eyed one - he has a habit of changing his looks, but when he's being himself he has white hair, blue eyes (which look like stars - his name means star) umm... oh yeh he has wings, lol almost forgot, but they're magpie wings, and he often has a few of them about, usually on his shoulders. Likes wearing cloaks, but that's pretty much it. Umm *thinks* i think the best description of him in is my story "Orion's Kiss"
Anyway, hope that helps ;) good luck if you want to draw him, he won't let me *sulks*
*throws a fluffy creation towards you*
*creation unrolls*
*bright lightning bolts crackle across the black spikes*
*cute face peers at you, before sinking wicked incisors into a low flying fork sailing by*
Oh yeh, this is the lightning hedgehog, a new breed i'm working on... might look cute and fluffy, but she ain't. Oh she's missing something - *digs hand in bag*
*pulls out more cirrus*
*fashions some wings*
*attaches them*
*fuzz* OUCH!! - watch out, the little blighter can be vicious... *goes to defuse hand*
*spikey ball floats around, crackling with intent*

  Comment From The Writer: Awwwwesooooome!! She's even better than B-Srod!! Heeeeee! Hmm, now I just have to work out how to regenerate MYSELF....

*reads your description, then takes out her list and scribbles: 'magpie-winged guy'* Got it.

Thanks for that! The reason I ask is that I wanted to update my art gallery *correction* Kelly wanted me to update my art gallery , so I'm collecting descriptions of people's muses to put together in one big picture. I can't guarantee that it will turn out any good (or even get posted, if I decide that it's too awful to exist), but I will try.

They never fed me enough mutton to keep up with the comments anyway...

Guess what? With luck, I'm back on-line tomorrow. Right now, I'm not on-line. Not really. This is my stand-in writing... honestly. His name is Panu too! Can you imagine?

Comment From The Writer: What, the comments on my page? Well, let's see...

I stole Fork Master's muse and locked it in my Terrible Muse Cage of Doom, where my own muse (a rainbow-winged angel) poisoned it. Cookie fed me death cake right after I so cleverly reincarnated myself with reincarnation cake (which IS a flavour, so there), so now I'm dead, but not for long, 'cause I have a cunning plan. Um. Where was I? Oh yeah. Since I'm dead, I was helpless to prevent Fork Master taking back her muse. Then Kelly tried to steal MY muse, but Darian shadowbound her and meddled with time and took it back. So now I have no muses except my own and a fat black python, which I thought was Cookie's muse but apparantly it's just a random snake. All clear now?

So. *takes out her notepad again* What does your muse look like?

Whoa. You drawing Jake's muse? Does that mean you gonna draw the rest of your captivated muses as well?

:: silence ::

That's not my muse. It's just a random snake, you know. Ahahaha!!! Fooled ya! =)

My muse is, aaah... pretty. Male. Weird. Elf. Funny. Aaaand... Irish? Eh. Hair dark as Guiness, eyes green as the Emerald Isle. Wussa! AND I won't let you have him. Nononono, I won't. No. Geroff.

*buzzes away, cacking maniacally*

Comment From The Writer: Yes, except that I don't actually have any captivated muses, apart from that python, and of course my own.

Awww, I was looking forward to drawing a black python. Oh well. Maybe I'll draw it anyway, since it's still in my cage.

MUSE LIST SO FAR:

- Rainbow-winged angel
- Silver-blue dragon
- Random black python who belongs to nobody
- Bright purple badger
- Shadowdragon
- Magpie-winged guy
- Weird male Irish elf

Magpie-winged guy? Some people...

*looks at own muse*
*muse grins sheepishly*

(he stinks)
(really?)
(metaphorically)
(oh)
(let's replace him!)
(oh, ya ya ya ya!!!)

*sideline people make a complex ritual and replace random Irish guy museness with python intellect*

Black Python: *hiss*

Oh, me... You evil, evil, skitzo part-of-my-personality people!!!

(ahaha)
(well, we got rid of that stuck up guy fer ye, didn't we?)
(yessa yessa yessa)

Hmpf. I'm just gonna stick around for a while: Beth was daydreaming something about exo--

(SHUT UP!!!!!!!)

Oh, right. Er. Something about exosceletons. Yes. I'm just gonna sit here, peacefully, and watch over my muse, so that she doesn't slither away, no? Er. Thank you.

Comment From The Writer: *stares at you* Would you make up your mind?? Is it a black snake or an Irish elf? Or both? Or a combination of a black snake and an Irish elf??

Black snake with vertical fat white stripes on belly. So sorry. Was having skitzophrenia attack at the moment, so didn't know what was saying.

(she's just kidding, you know)
(she's not a skitzo)
(she's just trying to be amusing)
(smarties!!)

Comment From The Writer: Black snake, okay. Um... can it still have emerald eyes? It could be an Irish snake!! Hahaha!! (Yeah, I know how ironic that is, that's the point. )

*skulks into room*

*draws huge pentagram around you*

*flourishes a book of spell from pocket*

*hem, hem* Begone, Foul Fiend!

*there is a sound poof*

*everything turns white*

*you look around, hoping to see the inside of your fishing hut, but all you see is -- whiteness. And more whiteness. And some more whiteness. There is no horizon, nothing in the entire world but whiteness which doesn't seem to begin or end.*

Ahm. Well, I sent you to Nothingness. I'm happy to say that you can't get out. Ever. Er... Because there's no exit, see, and no entrance. Except that which I opened.

*closes entrance, wipes pentagram from floor and burns the book of spells, scattering the ashes in the wind*

Just to be sure. Those two girls who hired me are sure paranoid, ahem.

*glances at Terrible Muse Cage of Doom*

Aaaw, what a cute purple badger... *nears cage, touches bars and gets blown to a million, zillion, trillion pieces which melt a hole in your floor*

  Comment From The Writer: *blinks and looks around herself in disbelief*

Nothing but whiteness.

*cups her hands to her mouth and calls: Hello?*

*silence*

Somebody??

*silence*

ANYBODY????

*silence*

*she begins to whimper*

Wait... this place looks rather suspiciously familiar...

*peers around carefully, and eventually discovers what she is searching for -- a couch. A very ugly, orange, squishy couch*

*walks to the couch and sighs in despair, sitting down and putting her chin in her hands*

I thought so.

Damn.

Zalrega: Who the heck are you? Where did you come from? Why are you sitting on my couch?

Comment From The Writer: *looks up, and gasps* ANOTHER LIVING PERSON!!! You'll help me, won't you? Won't you?! You have to help me!! I'm the Angler, and, and I was sent here by a couple of INSANE PEOPLE!!! Please, you have to get me out of here!! I'll, I'll do anything! I'll give you anything! Uh... *fishes desperately in her pockets, looking for something to trade for a way out, but finds only some crumbled shortbread, a few thumbtacks and a cockroach*

*wails* I don't wanna stay in here forever!!!!!

Hey!

I just wanted to say that your stories are incredible... You should be a pro writer...

Hey i also wanted to let u know that i added 4 more stories to my small collection... Also my computer had some problems and i had to format it and lost everything in the process so it might take some time for me to get back to writing (i don't even have microsoft word anymore - lol)
well come check out what i posted when u got some time ;)

i'll still be around at eflwood, so i'll drop by and see what other stories u post

Comment From B-Srod: Mrrreh. The Angler is most humbled and grateful, and mrrrregrets that she cannot be here in person to thank you.

Comment from Izzy: Vour zztoriezz! Ye godzz, you update fazzt! Ve vill read zzzzem on behalf of zze Angler azz zzzoon azz ve 'ave time! No Microzzzovt Vord? Zzzzat'z bad...

Comment From B-Srod: Mreh. Updates could be awhile if Megan doesn't get out of Xenzati...

Comment From Izzy: Yezz. Her updatezz are zzlow at zze bezzt of timezz, zzo you'll 'ave to be patient.

*looks up at disparaging comment about magpie-winged guy*
*is very much not impressed*
*hugs starry eyed suprise to herself*
Hmm... *grabs bag of clouds*
Here, i have something new that will eat Cookies *hands wizz about*
*a white swan appears out of the white nothingness*
Now listen carefully, you have to be careful with this one, she's a bit special. Look here *lifts one wing*
*swan looks a little ruffled*
This is one of Min'eth's chosen swans and here beneath the wings are golden feathers. Take one of these and write your wish upon your arm - the quills are sharp so you'll probably cut yourself, but just rub the feather over the wound at the end and it'll heal. Basically this'll bring you back to life, and away from nothingness.
::Warning!!:: Each feather will only work once! If you use an already used feather it will result in the opposite of your wish (and could end up in death! eep!! again)
Don't go using them for ridiculous things because you'll run out, she does not have an endless supply and the more you pluck feathers the more likely she is to peck you, hard!
Also beware all ye trespassers (and disparagers of Shaiel *grr*) she can be fiercely territorial and when she gets up enough speed can easily break and arm with those wings.
When her feathers have run out (there's usually around twelve) she'll fly away, back to her mistress - Overworld goddess of winds if you were interested, daughter of the goddess of storms. If you try to trap her she'll fade away and you will face the wrath of the gods - so beware - this present is treacherous, however it might just bring you back to this world and life.

Good luck!!

Comment From The Writer: *turns in surprise as a swan appears out of nothingness* *looks from Zalrega to the swan and back again*

*grins* See ya, Zalgy!

*plucks a gold feather, and hesitates with the quill poised over her arm*
Stab myself in the arm with a gold feather. Er. Right... *swallows* Well... it's not as though I haven't seen my own blood before.... *takes a deep breath and writes:*

I... *OWW!!* w...i...s...h... I... w...a...s... b...a...c...k... i...n... m...y... h...u...t

*at once, the whiteness vanishes and Megan is once again standing in her hut, along with the white swan*

WHOOOOHOOOOO!!!!!

*quickly swipes the feather over her arm*

*plucks another feather and thinks for a moment*

I... w...i...s...h... I... w...a...s...
I...M...M...O...R...T...A...L...!...!...!...!

MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

*plucks another feather* *the swan is starting to become agitated*

I... w...i...s...h... F...o...r...k... M...a...s...t...e...r... w...a...s... d... *runs out of room and tries to write the word 'dead' over the knuckle of one finger, but ends up with an illegible mess*

*winces and stares at her bleeding hand* Errr...? I don't know what I just did to her... Oh well, as long as it's something bad, I don't care.

*starts writing further up her arm this time*

I... w...i...s...h... C...o...o...k...i...e... w...a...s... *considers* *smirks evilly to herself*
...t...r...a...p...p...e...d... i...n... X...e...n...z...a...t...i

You only have eight left - use wise young angler.

And you know that whole writing in your own blood is supposed to be a deterrent - *watches megan pass out from blood loss*

Mortals! *rolls eyes and leaves*

Comment From The Writer: *lies unconscious on the floor amidst a scattering of used golden feathers*

*the swan takes the opportunity to peck her on the foot*

*whimpers* Angler? Alive? Immortal? With wishes?!



Uhoh *runs for cover*


Cookie, what did you do to my badger?!!!! He came staggering back to my page (thank goodness, the Angler was NOT supposed to take him- just observe and draw- and I was getting worried!) flashing neon orange and green, spouting magpie wings! WHAT DID YOU DO?!

  Comment From The Writer: *sits up and tries to focus on Kelly* Y-yeah... G-great, i-isn't it? Heh heheheh.

Y-you.... YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You made me.... I'M A... WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!


*runs out of room sobbing*

*returns with feather*

*tickles herself under nose*

*sneezes*

*turns into an orange and white cat with purple wings*

*GLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARE*

Mrrow, meow!! (Translation: HTML please and thank you)

*GLAREGLAREGLARE*

  Comment From The Writer: HAHAHAHA....!!! Awwww, what a cute hahaha widdle HAhaha puddy tat!! HAAAAA HAHAHA!!!!!!

What badger? I didn't do nothing to no badger...!

*POOF*

Er... what... happened....?

*whiteness*

Uh-oh.

*more whiteness*

Oh my.

*and some more whiteness*

NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Aaargh! Trapped with my own evil plots!!! I hate you, Megan!!!!!!!

*floats in nothingness looking v. agitated*

How can I EVER get back to ANYWHERE????

..... :: silence ::

Sideline people? ...... Sideline people?! .... SIDELINE PEOPLE?????!

Bugger. They're gone too.

*makes random movement with hand and POOF! there's a purple beanbag. Sits on purple beanbag, waiting for the Fork Master to rescue her*

  Comment From The Writer: *sniggers so hard she almost chokes on her chocolate chip toffee bar, which she has decided is even better than shortbread*

MUAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!! No-one's going to save you now!!!!! Heeee heeee!!!! *does a Zalrega-ish dance*

Would that mean I'm a sideline person? Hmm well sorry, but I don't think us sideline people can do much...the whole point of sideline people is to sit and watch. And occasionally cheer. But not to get involved in the game. Which is, in this case, not a game, more a war. Besides, I really don't know how to get into Xenzati. Its from one of Beth's stories, right? She might know.*nods wisely*

Comment From The Writer: *pats little ginger cat on the head* I have decided to name her...

FROK!!!!!!

*bursts into uncontrollable laughter*

*hair stands on end, and tail twitches viciously*

MRRRROW!!! MEOW!!!

*sneezes, and turns back into the Fork Master*

WHY, YOU [insert list of curses]!!!!!!!!

I'LL GET YOU FOR THIS, MEGAN!!!! A GINGER CAT!?!?!?!? I don't care if you're immortal!! You'll pay for this one!

*storms out*

(See, I told you those chocolate chip toffee bars were good. Got any holes in your brain yet? Muahaha...)

  Comment From The Writer: Heheheheh....

My brain probably looks like swiss cheese by now. But they're so goooood.... *takes another toffee bar and munches happily*

*smirks* How fitting. Well done on that illegible scribble Megan.

  Comment From The Writer: My pleasure. At least, it would have been, if it hadn't hurt so much. *whimpers slightly and rubs her hand in memory of the pain*

*squeal*

You people are so evil. Noo, Kelly, sideline people - my sideline people - are of my own making. Of my own skitzophrenical brain, that is.

Skitzophrenical Brain: Mwahahahahaha!!!!!

:: silence ::

Chocolate chip toffee bar... mmm... wanna!! You all are evil. Including Bethany, who is MAKING UP HER MIND on rescuing me. Oh, and, who agreed to help you in the first place, m'dear? One world. Two letters. Begins with an M. Ends with an E.

M
E
.

*cough* Anyway.

*nibbles at beanbag, trying to chew out to the stuffing - no one actually checked what was in that thing. Maybe it's candy! Yuuum!*

Oh, and. I've got another story in the queue. If you would like to know. Since I'm stuck here. At least some pen and paper would be kind?


... Mercy?

Comment From The Writer: Mmmmm, toffee bars.... You should ask Beth to give you the recipe. They're YUMMY!!

Yay! At least SOMEONE around here still updates! *glares around at... practically everyone... but EXTRA hard at a certain Fork Master*

Oooh! Only put story in ticket queue yesterday, and today it's published! Yii! Now have got 12 stories!

You know, I quite like it here in Xenzeti... peaceful.

  Comment From The Writer: Oooh! Another 'Night In The Lives Of...'!! Yay!!

Is 24 in the queue yet? You said it was almost done......

  Comment From The Writer: ... er?? Did I?? Ummmm... *glances at 24* Er. No, it's not finished yet. Sorry!

*glare*


*GLARE*



*BIG HUGE GREAT GIANT GGGGLLLLLLAAAAAAARRRRREEEE*

  Comment From The Writer: *smirks* How's two-dimensional life suiting you?

*coughiDOupdatesometimescough*

I WILL be updating soon. I SWEAR!! I finally finished Blood Red Blades for good, now all I have to do is finish off that Dragonites chapter, and we're good! XD (Who knows how long that will take...)

Xenzati, peaceful? Kinda quiet, ain't it? *shrugs* Well, okay. If you like it that much, I can get Zalrega to make you stay there forever. ^_^;;

*sneezes*

Comment From The Writer: Cookie in Xenzati forever? Sounds good to me.

Brief question for you - What's your favourite story of yours up here? (not FW i need something short ;)

  Comment From The Writer: Well in that case... I think I would have to say The Name on the Tower. I'm quite fond of Mercury Eye, as well.

I finally updated!!! *dances for joy, then runs*

  Comment From The Writer: It's about time!!!

*runs back in, stabs Megan's immortal toe with a fork, and scurries off, laughing madly*

Comment From The Writer: AAAAAAAARRRRGGGGHHH!!!! *clutches poor foot*

*grumbles* I don't think Jake knows I'm 2D now. Or that I'm that piece of paper he told you to throw out. *glare* That crumpling hurt.

Comment From The Writer: *rubs her toe* So did that fork. *GLARE*

How did you get out of that garbage can??

Have I missed something crucial during my absence? Like, has the war ended, or has someone started a new one? Myself, I've been reading some great Polish literature lately. In it, a woman eats poisonous mushrooms. It even has recipes for cooking poisonous mushrooms. I've yet to try them out...

Comment From The Writer: Haha, no, the war definitely hasn't ended... but now I'm IMMORTAL (muahaha), thanks to Becca's gift of a wishing-swan. And I turned Beth into a ginger cat whenever she sneezes, and Kelly into a 2D picture because she stole another comment title. And I sent Cookie to Xenzati, but apparantly she got out somehow. *sigh*

Ooooh, where can I get a copy of that book?

*walks in on Kelly and Megan talking and a surprised half-chuckle half-snort escapes*
That was YOU?
*keeps a straight face, walks out and bursts out laughing before regaining composure and walking back in*

  Comment From The Writer: Heheheheheh....

Dom dzienny, dom nocny. Olga Tokarczuk. No idea what that is in English, though.

Oh, and is Xenzati like this kind of place where there's only this one huge white plain, and then there are these, like, giant trees or something, and things grow from them that look like Barbababa, and that they have blue leaves, or yellow, and that in the horizon there's this huge grid, and this giant moon rises in lieu of sun, and the moon is... lavender?

What else can you do, now that you're immortal? Besides not die?

Comment From The Writer: Ummmmm... I don't know... laugh mockingly at people?

She can feeeeeel paaaiiinnn! *stabs a fork into Megan's other toe and runs away cackling*

Xenzati belongs to Zalrega, my char from Quest for the Atrium. Just in case you had forgotten. ^_^;; It's white and empty. Except for that ugly orange couch that I once gave to Jake...

Comment From The Writer: AAA-AAAA-AAAAAAAAAAGGGGHHHHHH!!!! Not the other one!!!!! *tries to run after Beth and stumbles to the floor in pain*

Owwwwwwwwww.... *whimper* Now I can't walk!! CURSE YOU!!!

*glares at Jake* Yes, it was me. Luckily the garbage can got knocked over by a cat (coincidence?) and a stray breeze blew me away. Thats the answer to your question, Megan. And by the way, have you decided if I get to have breaks from the two dimensional world yet? Or, *snicker* have you just been too busy..ah...stabbed in the feet by Beth? (nice work, Beth!)

Comment From The Writer: *sits down on the couch, carefully props her newly band-aided feet on the coffee-table, and picks up a plate of toffee bars*

*takes some time selecting one, before finally answering:*

I'm still thinking about it.

Well, it wasn't ME. I don't LIKE knocking over garbage cans... even when I am in cat mode. *angel eyes*

By the way, Kelly... congrats on 600th!!! *smiles sweetly at Megan and runs away laughing*

  Comment From The Writer: *chokes on a toffee bar*

WHAT??!!

WHAT??????!!!!!!!

*hides*

Comment From The Writer: *leaps to her feet, forgetting that they're injured, and immediately falls over again*

RIGHT. MATCHES. WHERE ARE THEY?

Prize for whomever gets 666th comment!!!

*helps Megan to her feet and immediately trips her again and giggles*

Comment From The Writer: *takes a fishhook from her belt and stabs it into YOUR foot. HARD*

*a manic, dangerous light fills her eyes* #666 is MINE!!!

Umm...yeah....600th comment...nothing...not worth mentioning...but that 666th comment...thats a big deal...you should go for it...ah...yeah...*nervous laugh*

Comment From The Writer: #666 IS MINE!!!!

OWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWIE!!!!!!! *clutches injured foot*

Dammit, that HURTS!! *grumbles loudly and hops out the door, shooting Megan a dark look on the way*

Comment From The Writer: *sniggers* *uses a golden feather to heal her own two feet*

*brings forth her sun bird, Iggy, and torches Megan's feet*

*they are now exactly the way they were before... in pain.*

Iggy is great. ^___^ Bex gave him to me. I call him Ignigena, or Iggy for short. He won't burn you that much, but he CAN reverse your swan-wishes. It's on my page somewhere, in case you missed that bit.

*smirks, and hugs Iggy*
*gets torched*

Comment From The Writer: *SCREAM*

*grabs cushions from the couch and frantically bats out the flames*

*finds herself once again on the floor, in pain*

I'M GOING TO GET YOU FOR THAT!!!

Yes, I knew about your sun bird. *GLAAAAAAAAARE*

*looks at above comments*
Hmm...something is going on here that I missed, but whatever it is it is highly amusing.
*fades into the crowd of spectators and watches the comment list grow*
*sips on a coke*
You're all so amusing, so very amusing...
I will be back, never fear.

THE CAPS LOCK MONSTER: THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT SHE FEARS, IDIOT.

(to The Muse) Will you ever give me some good comment characters?

The Muse: *sipping on a latte* I'll think about it. Try again later.

Anyway...I look forward to reading your work. Though if I ever have to choose sides, I think I prefer that of the Fork Master, your nemisis. But we will see. I am, as of yet, neutral.

Comment From The Writer: Just a continuation of the never-ending comment war... *sigh* Yes, being stabbed in both big toes, torched with sun birds and burnt with my own matches is no doubt highly amusing. Unless, of course, you happen to be ME. *glare* They will pay. They will ALL pay....

*eyes narrow* Very well. But if you choose Fork Master's side, I will have to torture you. *fingers a fishhook meaningfully*

Oh and, um, thank you for visiting.

Go ahead and torture me. The Fork Master has linked me in her bio, so has my eternal gratitude.

Mr. Fuzzikins: You're so easily won over. I'd bet you'd switch sides in an instant.

Um... Mr. Fuzzikins is the only comment character the muse would give me besides CAPS and herself. So yeah... ignore him. He's sullen cause no one loves him.

Anyway, I guess this makes you my enemy. *prepares herself for the torture*

Whatever. No torture can compare to the three little kids I'm babysitting today for six hours.

Comment From The Writer: *drops her face into her hands* I really NEEDED another enemy... *sighs deeply* Why isn't anyone ever on MY side?

*appears in full, 3D form, with a gigantic grin on her face* Hello! *waves sarcastically, smirks, then turns on her heel and walks away*

Comment From The Writer:

*as you turn to leave, you find the doorway blocked by an evil-looking Storm Ram and an equally evil-looking Lightning Hedgehog*

Comment From Izzy: *grins sadistically* Vhere do you zink YOU'RE goink?

*Megan watches with amusement as Kelly is electrocuted*

Ah, sorry. The Fork Master found me first. Anyone who gives me comments and linkage wins me over like a puppy dog and a dog treat. ^_^ But I'm not very fierce (for now) I'm just insane (yesh I am). Besides... you ARE immortal. It's not like it's hard for you.

But there's always the chance I could be persuaded to go to the dark side... but it is just you, so it's something to ponder. But Beth has, for now, my total loyalty. ^_^ And she won my contest. Twice. So things are weighted towards her... for now. *ominous thunder sounds*

Comment From The Writer: True. Not being able to die is a distinct advantage... but those cursed forks still HURT...

You could be persuaded?? *eyes glimmer with sinister hope* Yessss.... come to the dark side, Luke *ahem* Hanna.

*shadowbinds Hanna* Stay here for a while and enjoy some electrocution. *calls over Izzy and B-SRoD* *smirk* And in further contests of yours, put a note saying people can't use google. *hinthint*

Comment From The Writer: Izzy and B-Srod leave Kelly twitching on the floor and float over to their next victim...

The next contest is going to be so hard that even google won't help them. [insert evil laugh here]

And you think you can electrocute me? *smiles* I've put my finger in the light socket so many times that it's but a slightly unpleasant feeling. Go ahead and try, brother of Beth. I look forward to it.

B-Srod: ZAP!!

Izzy: ZAP!!

B-Srod: ZAP!!

Izzy: ZAP!!

B-Srod: ZAP!! ZAP!!!!

Izzy: ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZAAAAAAPPPP!!!!

B-Srod: ZAPZAPZAPZAPZAPZAPZAPZAPZAP... zap... z-z-z... a... p...

Comment From The Writer: Dammit. Why did Bex have to give Beth that sun bird? I could really use a wish right now...

500th comment, thou sayeth? I had no idea. And my main page has only got to its 100th comment...

*spots B-Srod* Wow, you got another one! Hello, sheep!

*patts him, and B-Srod licks hand*

*grins maliciously and takes garden scissors out of pocket*

*shaves B-Srod*

Ahaha ... Hahaha ... Bwahahahahaha!

*scampers off, but plants a couple of land mines at the entrance before leaving*

B-Srod: *whimpers and hides under the coffee-table*

Izzy: *snickers*

Comment From The Writer: *glares furiously at Vida* That was CRUEL!! It happens to be the middle of winter here, you know!

*popps head behind door frame, carefully avoiding the motion-triggering mines*

How close to the 500th comment, actually?

  Comment From The Writer: Reaaaaaaaaalllly close....

Archie, the Little Turkish Salesman:
Hello, beautiful girl. Vere are you from? Vant to buy from my shop? I have veapons of mass destruction: land mines, undervater mines, shotguns, darts! I have subtle, ladylike veapons: poison, daggers, choking corsets, and rings filled vith poison of your choice, at a special discount - ten for 5 dollar, only for you! I've also got - as a special offer - titanium fishhooks, built to undergo various circumstances, for example molten lava, acid, fire, and anything else. You like? You buy, yes?

Comment From The Writer: *a dreamy look crosses her face* Veapons of mass destruction...

I'll take them all.

We don't want the 500th comment, we want Ferrian's Winter updates, right?

Right!

Comment From The Writer: You don't want a free story/poem/*cringeartcringe* request or other prize of your choice, as well as the honour of being the 500th comment winner?

*shrugs* Suit yourself...

FW... ah, I have no excuses this time except laziness. That, and I'm in 'drawing phase' at the moment. Just let me finish (or at least draw until I get sick of it) the muse picture and get this other short story out of my head, and I'll see what I can do.

*glances at comment counter, eyebrow raised*

Ooooooooooooh.... I'd tell you how close you are, but since you don't WANT it.... *smirks*

So tell me... how close? This close *puts hands right next to each other* or this close *flings arms wide open... now, she doesn't want a hug from you*?

Cause you know, there's a big difference. *nods head*

Comment From The Writer: How close?

THIS close:





CONGRATULATIONS!!! YOU ARE THE 500TH COMMENT WINNER!!!

*doesn't have any confetti, so throws a handful of thumbtacks instead*

I had a disturbing feeling it was going to be you... *sigh* Oh well. So, what is your request?

*no, not now. So many typos... they make no sense.

Waitaminute... don't tell me Ano Mynous was the 500th? O.o Cause if he/she was...

That would be so sad.

Then again, you were probably lying, knowing you Ms. Darth Angler. *snicker*

What does that make me... Yodanna? Or Hanna Skywalker? Unless that postion is taken by Beth... and who else is there?

Comment From The Writer: No, you definitely got the prize.... And I don't lie! *looks indignant* I never lie! I might be devious occasionally, but I don't LIE.

You would be Hanna Solo, of course.

Aha! Yayy! *does the happy dance* I had a feeling it would be me, too. And whadya know? I was right.
Let me sleep on the request. I'm too tired to think of anyting right now... heh heh. Expect it to be odd and insane, though. And I'll give you lots of breathing room with it, so you can be creative. ; )

  Comment From The Writer: Odd and insane. Okay. Cool.

You people are truly %*@#ed up. But...then again. One could beg to differ. Oh well...I suppose I'm one of you now....goddamnit...Well be sure to visit my gallery when it opens..in roughly...a week or less.
Regards Bunto!

  Comment From The Writer: *blinks* Uh... thanks for visiting?

*looks up*

That's Tim's "friend" Bunto. He's been lurking around my art gallery recently. O.O I claim no association with him.

*cough cough* My request... is must have something involving flying rams (bighorn sheep... whatever) in it. *nods head* Cause rams are my favorite animals (got a stuffed one by my computer) and adding wings to them is fun.

It could be purple too, or something like that... yeah... you get the picture. The rest of the story is up to you. just make sure it's got that flying purple (or whatever color you want) ram in it somewhere.

  Comment From The Writer: Flying purple ram!!

B-Srod: *looks happy*

Okay, I'll see what I can do. You'll probably have to wait awhile for it, though. My muse works slowly.

Oh yeah...it should be a short story. Don't want you to strain yourself thinking I want an epic (or horror of all horrors, a poem) or something like that. 1 chapter, beginning to end, not to long unless you really want it to be. 'Kay? S'all good.

  Comment From The Writer: No worries.

*blinks in shock and amazement*

I... missed the whole thing????

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOES!!!!!!!!!!! *sob*

  Comment From The Writer: Yep. Sorry!

GUESS WHO JUST SNAGGED 500TH MAIN PAGE COMMENT ON MY PAGE?????

HA HAAAA!!!

You shouldn't have left, you might've had a chance against her m4D h4X0r commenting skillz!

Comment From The Writer: Indeed, she did.

Hey! Beth, I wanted to tell her!

Oh well. I got #500 and yo-ooou didn't! Hahahahaha...

  Comment From The Writer: I no longer care. I got #666 and YOU didn't.

So... what do you want?

...

My name is too long. I'm shortening it to the Solo part, I think. The rest can be explained in the bio... unless you know how to shorten it down?

Comment From The Writer: Ummm... I'll think about it...

You could shorten it to 'Keeper of Cute', although I think it would be nicer if you just left it as 'Solo'.

Okay. I hate to tell you this, but my little brother and his friend want to see how I kill people. So. A demonstration might be necessary! *angelic eyes*

*snatches throwing forks out of belt and flings them into Megan's unprotected back*

*stalks over to where Megan is lying in pain, and stabs her multiple times with her lightsaber-fork*

Yes, I know you're not dead. But STILL! I dunno. They just don't get it. *sigh*

*wipes her bloodied fork clean with a towel, and wanders away*

  Comment From The Writer: *bleeds on the floor* *gives a slight whimper of pain*

Oi, I didn't know you were an Aussie too!
*Shakes hand formally, not at all perturbed by numerous hooks*
Great bio! And Ferian's Winter sounds great, just the description is enough to make me print out. Here I go...
But I'll leave some good comments on them when I return.
And um, well...
*shuffles feet*
I'd like to join your team! Death to the KAGS, and all that! No offense to Hanna and Beth, but I definitely think you're in the right. Plus the fact you're lying on the ground with forks impaled into your back. Um, maybe I should call a doctor...

  Comment From The Writer: *sits bolt upright: pain, blood and forks instantly forgotten, and stares at you with huge eyes*

Did... d-did you just say... you want to join me? Y-you WANT to join ME???

REALLY?????

*is not usually one for hugging complete strangers, but...*

*squeals with joy, leaps up and gives you a BIG hug* YOU RULE!!!!!!!!!! DEATH TO KAGS!!!!!!!!! EEEEEEEHEHEHEEHEHEHEHEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!

And you're AUSTRALIAN!!!!! This is so COOL!!!!

*grins* Oh and, uh, don't worry about all this--*gestures at the blood and stab wounds* I'm immortal. And I have a Sword of Healing, so no worries, eh?

*glares at Tim* She's immortal. She don't need no doctor. And she is TEH evil.

Though she still gets her request, her link on my bio, and much praise for FW. =P. Stupid evil writer with those fishooks...

  Comment From The Writer: Heeeeeheheheheheh!!!! *is still ecstatic over the fact that she has a new ally*

Of course she's evil, why else would I be on her side? Then again, Frok is pretty evil too. Oh well, let it never be said that being evil is a bad thing.

  Comment From The Writer: Evil is FUN!!! You need a Star Wars nickname, Dazza. So does Tim. Hmmmm.... Who else was on the Dark Side?

*glares* Ow. That HURT! But now that you got 666th comment, you can stop being evil to me. *nods* Hmm...seems like I've missed quite a bit HERE too...

  Comment From The Writer: Yes. You missed a LOT. *smirks*

Stop being evil to you? But you're a KAGS member. And I'm Darth Angler. KKKKKKEEER-SSSSSSSSHHHH!!!!!

oh, and MUSE PICTURE?!!!

Comment From The Writer: It's coming!!! Actually, it's coming along quite well... I've got sketches of them all except Beth's dragon and Vida's python. It's mainly Beth's that I'm stuck on. I'm not that great at drawing ultra cute things... o_O

~_^ Now ye have three. And may the next be? (dear Lord that was horrible)

I have the feeling that more new people are going to show up and fall prey to your evilness. Though... *eyes her cute and fluffy things* I have quite a bit of evilness too. [insert evil laugh here] But Beth is certain of my loyalty. ^_^ If only cause I can't keep switching sides. (but it's so much fun!) and also cause she found me first ('tis true, 'tis true!)

Did I hear you say that you can't draw cute things? *cocks eyebrow* I may be able to help you with that... heh heh heh...

Comment From The Writer: Yep, I can't draw cute things. *sigh* They just end up looking stupid. I could use any help I can get, to be honest...

*raises eyebrows* The Angler? Asking for help? My, my, what a surprise. Well... *calls off Baisley, who was ripping you to pieces on Beth's page* I suppose I could help. ~_^

Advice: (in writing. I can show you drawings later) Round eyes, big ol' watery light reflections. Tiiiiiny little wings, a big, cute belly. Smooth, round lines. You want the body and eyes big, and mostly everything else small. Give 'em tiny little spikes and maybe a cute little tooth. *imagines it* I can see the cuteness in my head. 3\/UL cuteness.

If you need soem more help, I can show you visually what I mean.

  Comment From The Writer: Heheheh, thanks! That helps. Some drawings would be nice, if you wouldn't mind... Geez, listen to me! I'm s'posed to be Darth Angler... *clears throat* SHOW ME CUTE DRAGON PICTURES, MORTAL, OR DIE!! KKKEEERRR-SSSSSSHHHHH!!!!

Hmm, a nickname, eh?
How about Tim Maul? That sounds good. I mean evil, evil, hehehe...
Oi, Hanna Solo can't be evil! Then she would most likely make Chewbacca into a fur coat. Actually, that's not a bad idea. Although the fleas would be annoying ;)
Our ranks are swelling, Evil Emperess Darth Angler. And I think I could persuade Matt to join as well. He loves evil, plus he's Aussie too.

  Comment From The Writer: Tim Maul, great! Ah, yes, your friend Matt... Er. He might be a little TOO evil. I don't know if I want to offend people to death...

HEY... what is this??? You can't go around calling me GOOD!!

...besides. I STARTED the war, and I was always the evil one who kept attacking the innocent Angler with pumpkin seeds and forks. PLUS I have Vida on my side. Obi Wan Cookie, who is actually SUPER EVIL.

I don't wanna be the good side. THE DARK SIDE IS WHERE I LIVE!!!!

...it's just a different Dark Side than the one where you are...

SO THERE!!! Neither of us are good. There is no light...

  Comment From The Writer: Yes, true. You were evil before I was... Both sides are dark, then. WE ARE ALL EVIL!!

I think it's true- both sides are evil. ^_^

[insert evil laugh here]

I just love those evil laughs.

  Comment From The Writer: *evil laugh*

Before I forget, you have to make your request at my page. *sweatdrop* I should write all these requests down. So many... so little time before school starts...

Comment From The Writer: Okay, sure. BTW, what happened to the dragon piccies??? I NEED cute dragon piccies!!!!!!

hey, Hanna's been sweating everywhere lately. Texas humidity must be getting to her, huh?
Ok, so I have the name, but now methinks I need a bakery product.
How about ginger biscuits. They're yummy. And the taste is so bitter that you could disguise poison in them quite easily...hehehe.

Comment From The Writer: Hanna's from Texas?? Wow, I never knew that...

Yeah, ginger bikkies would be good. Or possibly doughnuts. Everyone likes doughnuts. OR... JAM DOUGHNUTS!! Now THERE'S an evil food, if ever there was one. They look so innocent and yummy, but as soon as you bite into them... great pain ensues as your tongue is burnt off by boiling jam. I suspect that whoever makes them adds some sort of secret ingredient that causes the jam inside to rise to an excessive temperature, REGARDLESS of the outside temperature of the doughnut. Evil, I tell you.

*watches Megan milkshake mess up the nice floor* Eeeewww, gross. I'd better clean that up.

*takes mop and mops up puddle* *rings mop out into bucket* *walks away, ignoring screams of anger coming from the bucket* That'll teach you to try to kill my beanies. *sits down and begins sewing Ears back together* At least I had my stuffed animal resurrection kit ready.

  Comment From The Writer: *gurgles* I'll get you!

haha... hiya, long time no hear from! Then again.. I've been kinda scarace too I suppose. haha, at anyrate, your character is in the next chapter of flintlock mages and that chapter is uploaded... I apologize it was hastily put together and I lost the first draft that I think was much better. ANYWAY, the moon light maiden is now an actor in my play ;) Cya.

  Comment From The Writer: ALL RIIIIIIGGGGHHHHT!!!! *tries to run off to John's page, then remembers she is in a bucket*

*attempts to slosh over the edge, but fails*

Rather than bother with actually drawing something, (effort? What's that?) I'll give you websites of cute dragons that you can use. *nods head* None of them are as good as something I can draw (of course) but they will still help.

http://www.slickreality.com/solitaryrose/images/sd_dragon.jpg

http://www.peachtails.com/crafts/cutestickers.jpg

http://www.adventuresinceramics.com/img/a44023fy.jpg

http://www.artecy.com/lcutedragon.jpg (cross stitch??? O.o)

http://home.sol.se/maja/minabilder/otherstuff/dragonsad.jpg (awwww, how cute! It's sad)

Those were all the ones I found that were cute, draconish, and still in proportion. They should help you some. ~_^ If not, I'll draw something for ya'.

  Comment From The Writer: Awesome! Thanks!

*picks up neglected bucket, and makes her way to the kitchen sink*

*adds some green dish soap and water and swishes bucket around until it is filled with bubblies*

*smiles sweetly into bucket and pours the whole mess down the drain...*

Oh. Just for clarification, are you guys talking about my cute widdle dragon muse?

  Comment From The Writer: NOOOOOO!!! NONONONONONOOOOOOOOOO!!! NOT THE DISHWASHING SOAP AGAIN!!! AAAAAARRR--*gurglegurglegurgle...*

HOWEVER...

The Angler REFUSES to be poured down the drain, and so, using all the power of the Force, propels herself back out of the sink and into Beth's face*

Yes, we're talking about your cute widdle big-eyed dragon muse. Curse its cursed little soul...

You have a serious attitude problem.

You got #666, didn't you? DIDN'T YOU!??? Uuugh... I could just... ah, wait, I have a better idea!

*zapps you and turns you into a bottle of Fairy*

*humms softly, and pours the bottle into a bucket full of water*

*waits for huge bubbles to form, and empties contents of bucket into soap bubble machine*

*turns on soap bubble machine and watches little bubbles of Megan float around the room and pop*

Pop! Pop! Pop! Hahaha! Oh, by the way, did anyone step on those landmines?

Comment From B-Srod: *floats through the doorway, glancing down at the landmines*

Nope.

*lowers his head and butts Vida hard, causing her to fall onto the mines*

*watches with great amusement as the huge explosion scatters Vida bits all over the hut*

*reaches over and pops a Megan bubble*

That's so entertaining. *scoops up some Megan fluid, then puts it in a jar* *takes bubble wand and begins blowing Megan bubbles, all the way back to her own page*

Yep, I'm from Texas. Though you can't tell by that fuzzy dot... I could be in ten states from the size of it.

  Comment From The Writer: *a Megan bubble pops angrily in Hanna's face, getting stinging bubble fluid in her eye and causing her to drop the jar*

*the puddle of fluid reforms ominously into the shape of the Angler*

*the Angler calmly selects a fishhook from her belt and twirls it* Time for some fishhook action, methinks...

*fishhook blurs, and a moment later, Hanna falls to the ground in pieces*

*gathers up bits of Hanna and bits of Vida and carries them into a back room, where she drops them cheerfully into a cauldron of bubbling poison*

Comment from the Now Dead Hanna: *grumble grumble* But you're immortal! And I'm not! So what am I going to do?

It's actually quite cool in this bubbling cauldron when compared with the extreme heat we've had recently. Wednesday was the hottest day of the year, 'til Thursday broke that record... the Friday broke THAT record... stupid heat.

*gets stirred by a giant spoon and is mixed in with bits of Cookie*

  Comment From The Writer: Heheheh... *stirs the pot*

Extreme heat?? Oh man... wanna swap? I'll go to Texas and you can come to Tasmania... It's FREEEEEZING!!!! I can't even sit at my computer for too long, because my hands literally go numb... It's horrible. I want summer. *whimpers*

So you mean you want 98 degrees F? (no idea what Fahrenheit to Celsius is... but that's HOT!) Not to mention humidity that makes it in the 100s.

And do you want rain that comes and stay around for weeks at a time? Followed by humidity so bad that you step out the door and the water in the air makes sweat for you? Do you want that, huh? HUH?

*huff* I'll trade you, yes I will.

*is stirred*

  Comment From The Writer: On seeeecond thought.... *cough* I think I'll just be quite happy here as an icicle...

Oh yes, I see now. Your dot points clearly to Tasmania.
Wow it's cold here, so Tassie...
Do you live near Hobart or Launceston? Silly me, there's probably a million places in Tasmania besides those two cities. Like...
Port Arthur!
Or...
The southern parts! Near the wilderness!
And I think Beth pops in here to caue mischief far too regularly. I shall see Amanda about updating one of her Gnome Traps to capture enemy commenters. Then we can take her light saber fork, and she'll be powerless, hehehe...

  Comment From The Writer: Lol, stupid dot. I could be in Melbourne, for all anyone knows. I live on the north-west coast, about half an hour from Devonport (which is where the ferries come in). It's very pretty, lots of green rolling hills and all that...

Honestly. There's more to Tassie than Port Arthur and trees, like... er... *thinks for awhile* I fail to think of anything right now, but I'm sure there's something...

*bits of Cookie with help of The Force (not the footbal team!) merge into a whole Cookie*

Bwahaha! Evil shall never prevail!

*zapps Angler into a bottle of rose-scented air-freshner and takes it to Skywalker's page*

Sssh! You didn't see this! *evil grin*

Comment From The Writer:

*while Cookie is remaking herself, she melts completely and melds with the poison* *the pot cools, and with the help of the Force and Cookie, she is reformed... but now the poison is a part of her*

*eyes new body* Well, this is interesting. Muahahaha... I have a new body now, complete with superpowers! Well, okay, maybe not superpowers... but you get the idea. ~_^

  Comment From The Writer: Curse it...

Yes, you could be in Melbourne, god forbid(shudders) ;)
Sydney is much better. But we get no snow; I'd imagine it's cold enough to snow down near Devonport, hmm?
The KAGS are infinetly evil and cunning, that they are. We needs a plan, Angler m'dear. I think we should take one of them out. But who?
Wait a minute...
*glances around suspiciously*
We're being listened into! Ok, let's talk in inaudible whispers.
muttermuttermutter...

Comment From The Writer: Lol. I've never been to Sydney. :( I've never been anywhere, except Melbourne and once to Canberra, and that was on a family trip about 10 years ago. I got to see Parliament House. *rolls eyes* Oooh, yay.

*whispers* One of them?? I think we should take 'em ALL out...

Ok, it appears you were stolen before, so I went to the fork master's library and retrieved you in can form. Now I'll just spray this around here, and you'll be good as new!
Oh and do you think we should tell Hanna about that bottle of cat pee that accidently got labelled poison? Nah it's probably not important, I mean it's not as if anyone would go and FUSE with it, would they? ;)

  Comment From The Writer: *nearly chokes from laughing so hard*

Hey! The Darth Angler! Wow! I'm a big fan of yours! Hey, can you show me the breath thing? And the destiny thing? You know, "it is your destiny, young Skywalker", khoosh, wheeze.

Comment From The Writer: It is your Destiny, young Skywalker. KKKKEEEERRR-SSSSHHHHH!

Hey, want a free t-shirt and a glow in the dark plush hook?

*chokes* Ewww, you guys are so nasty. *unfuses* *reforms as herself... and only herself* I'm not ever coming back here again. =P

Wait... why are you looking so happy about that? Fine then, I'm coming back! So ha!

*pets Baisley* We'll get them some day, my precious. Yesh, we will.

Baisley: Bah. (which translates to: Shut up, you stupid human, before I poke your eyes out with my horns.)

*mutters* I'm going to take a bath...

  Comment From The Writer: *sniggers uncontrollably*

Heheh...thats funny. I thought i was truly reading a story! You must be good! Now i hafta read the rest of you ACTUAL stories! :D

  Comment From The Writer: Lol, do you mean the comments or the bio story? You should definitely read the stories, yes. You'll find much better writing there, although slightly less amusing, I have to say.

Yay, the Bee Gees rock!
So do The Jets, Daniel Mereweather, Cold Chisel, Silverchair, and The Dissociatives. Delta Goodrem is a bit girly, but she still rocks cuz she can play the piano and she's hot.
You've never been to Sydney? That's unbelievable! But then, I've never been to Tasmania.
All of them, yes mistress, but first we have to target them one by one. And then, when the fork master is outnumbered, WE shall kill HER good! Ahahaha!

  Comment From The Writer: 'Ah ha ha ha, we're stayin' alive, stayin' alive...' *cough* Sorry, couldn't resist...

You like the Bee Gees too? YAY!!! Mmmm, yes, they are all good bands. Lol, at least Delta can actually SING, unlike certain other girly soap stars (ack!).

Yeah, I know... I'm an Aussie and I've never even been to our most famous city. Sad, isn't it? *sigh* Oh well. I like Tassie, despite the cold, and the boredom, and the lack of employment opportunites, and the woodchip companies making our beautiful ancient forests into cardboard boxes, and the fact that we still don't have an AFL team...

Hmmm... *drums her fingers slowly* Yes, you are right, we should take them out one by one.... I think we should start with Kellidala. She is formulating some kind of insidious plot to torture me...

Wow! Glowing plush hook! I, I, I, I'm going to swoon...

Hey, that breath part was pretty good. I was thinking about joining the Dark Side as the Stormtrooper Who Never Hit Anything, and I must say, you Dark Side guys are pretty convincing...

...but then again, the Moderately Cooked Side has THE OLD Obi-Wan! AAAAAAAAAAAAA

I'm torn between two irresistible desires.

  Comment From The Writer: YES!! JOIN THE DARK SIDE!! We have those, uh, big walking machine things, AT-AT's or whatever they were called! Now how cool is that?

Great idea, Kellidala it is. Now all we need is a few more allies to really execute our will.
It's all falling into plan!*first evil laugh of the day*
Yes, join us Panu! And you already have a nickname, excellent! If you join the KAGS, then you'll have to - get ready for this - be loving and merciful! Ack! I would rather listen to Beck Cartwright sing, or "The Saddle Club Song" stuck on repeat!
Actually, that might not be a bad torture idea. *second evil laugh*
And I've just about convinced Lee-Ann, the magical butt, to join us as well. She's a fellow Aussie, and I'm sure if you were to speak to her it would help to persuade her mind... I think there's a link on Hanna Solo's page.

Comment From The Writer: "The Saddle Club Song"! AAAAAAARRRRGGHHH!!! THE HORROR! THE HORROR! Yes, that would be an EXCELLENT torture idea! Muahahahaha!!

Ooooooooooh, another recruit! EXCELLENT! I will go and pay her a visit, yes...

Right! *settles down and takes a really deep breath* Let's try this again shall we...

*storm of weeping*
I just wrote you a huge comment all about me and the dark side and created you a new pet and everything... and it's... it's ... GONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*is now not happy*
*ZZZZZZZZZZZZZAP!!*
Get off you little bugger!
Here... I just created him for you using my new super mix of stratus and cumulonimbus, but he's a moody beggar... beware his very short temper.
Oh sorry, he's a miniature storm unicorn... at the moment he's about the size of a football. But if you leave him standing in water (if you can get him to stay still for long enough) he'll grow - make one helluva mighty steed, except for that temper!
*BuuuuuuuuuuuuuuzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ!!*
*SLAP!*
Do it again and i'll throw water over your head and fuse you!
His horn is packed with lightning volts, and they hurt *tries to flatten fuzzed up hair* Please take him away before I'm forced to try Unicorn meat *glares*
*Buuuzzz!*
*grrrrrrrrrrr*
Oh the other thing was I want a Darth Angler action figure! But I can't join the dark side full time *evil characters sigh in frustration* I prefer to be impartial and give benevolent gifts... or in this case - glances uni's way - seriously malevolent ones.
It's certainly busy in here... how are the other Cloud pets?
*wonders off to find somewhere to discharge *BUZZ!* *
I hate my own creations...

[grr it tried to do it again! Lucky i saved this comment this time *sulks*]

  Comment From The Writer: Another cloud pet!!!! YAAAAAY!! Oh, and B-Srod and Izzy are still alive and well, never fear! Heheheh.

I don't give away my uber-cool Darth Angler action figures to just ANYONE, you know! BUT, you gave me another pet, so... Very well. You may have one, and I will accept you as a part-time Dark Side member. Do you want to be Chewbecca or Becca Fett?

[peevish pining noise made by still slightly pink werewolf entering with small triangle] Who he? Why he do that? Are you going to help me get my gong back? Why don't action figures burn when you set fire to them? Hair does. Rice cakes do. Aerosol does. Muffins do[eventually]. White spirit does[hence the name]. Nnnnnnn. [continues attempts to set fire to solid plastic]

Comment From The Writer: B-Srod and Izzy watch a slightly pink werewolf with a small triangle enter.

B-Srod: Mrrreh, what's that? Is it dangerous?

Izzy: It lookzz zzuzzpiciouzzz... Do you zzink verevolves burn vhen you z-z-z-zap zzzem?

B-Srod: Mrreheheh. Wanna find out?

Izzy: Yezz, let'zz!

ZZZZZZZZZZZZAAAAAAAPPPP!!!

Hey, we could use a werewolf on the dark side *grins*. How's about we let her join?
Hmm, if you are going to be Chewbecca, you have to promise not to be nice to your "friend, Hanna Solo. Really what does she do but keep you prisoner on the Mellineum Falcon, as nothing but a slave. The only reason the intergalatial branch of the RSPCA hasn't hauled her ass in is because Wookies can't talk.

  Comment From The Writer: LOL! Hey, yeah, a werewolf WOULD be handy to have around...

Hey, if she's Chewbecca, she's on our side! BWAHAHA!!!

*cheers madly, and wanders off*

  Comment From The Writer: I KNOW, I did consider that... but, it just sounded so cool. And I thought she could be, like, an evil Chewie, or a half-evil Chewie, or... something. Yeah, so that's not technically accurate to the movies, but YOU tried to get a Stormtrooper to shoot Darth Angler! *glares*

LOL! I was gonna say Chewie's a goodie... If i'm becca fett i get to be a bounty hunter - which means I am neither good nor bad - i assassinate for money MUhahahahahahahahaha!!

YAY!! A Darth Angler action figure!

Oh I know what I was asking... Anymore Ferrian and co anywhere along the way?

  Comment From The Writer: Exactly, that's why I suggested it! Heheheh. Becca Fett it is then!

Ferrian and co are coming... sometime. I dunno. When I can find a way to stop procrastinating...

No, they singe. And it makes them ANGRY. [NNNNNNNnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnyyyeh]
Take a lesson from what happened to Forkwalker and don't make me use the squeaky telephone, buddy.

Comment From The Writer: Alright, alright. Sorry. I admit, I just wanted to use the word 'verevolves'...

Hey, wanna join the Dark Side?

*grins evilly, and says in a voice full of scorn* A Darth Angler action figure? Like, seriously, how LAME can you get?! I mean, come on, who would actually BUY that stuff? Like, omg, some people...*smirks*

Oh, and I think its time for me to reveal our new attack-

...wait for it...


Ni!
Ni!
NI!
NNIIIIII!!!!

*Kellidala cackles evilly as the Darth Angler covers her ears, and slowly collapses at her feet in pain*

MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAhaha*cough*...haha...ha..

Comment From The Writer: HEY! Action figures are COOL! *takes out one of her Darth Angler action figures and presses a little button on its back, making it throw tiny, yet nevertheless extremely sharp fishhooks at Kellidala*

Darn! Ran out of ammunition... *suddenly clamps her hands over her ears* AAAAAAAAARRRRGGGGHHH!!! HELP!!! I'M BEING NI'D!!!

*narrows eyes* That IT, it's war! 'Tis officially official now! *summons evil minions* *minions of cuteness come prancing in*

Les Minions: NI!!! ni ni ni ni ni ni ni ni ni *gasps for breath* NIIIIIIII!!!!!

Ha! Take that, evil Angler!

Comment From The Writer: AAAAAAARRRGGGHHH!!!

Nnnnnnniiiiii!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Comment From The Writer: *tries to clamp her hands tighter over her ears*

Wello, we could have used extra time, but what the hell,
CHARGE!!!!!!!!!
*notices he's the only one in the library*
Ahh, drown that horrible noise out!
Mistress, what happened to you?
*slips a pair of earmuffs over the Angler's ears, then does the same*
It's not working! There's too many stuffed toys, all chanting at the same time...
I know!
*reaches into "box of the damned"*
Ok, DVD set of the complete series of "Rosanne", Fran Drescher's unreleased singing albumn, Plans for a house built by straw...
Here we go!
*places CD into player, turns volume up on high*
"HELLO WORLD, THIS IS ME, LIFE SHOULD BE, FUN FOR EVERYONE!"
Well, thank god that song was useful for something.
*watches with relief as the toys come apart at the stitches, due to the horrible sound coming from the large speakers*
Ok, we repelled the first attack, but this isn't the end, I'm certain. Meanwhile, I think you should activate the Fishing Hut's defenses. I know you're immortal, but I'm very worried about ending up like my star wars counterpart
*clutches stomach nervously*
I think we should get Emberice.

  Comment From The Writer: *breathes a sigh of relief as the 'ni-ing' finally stops* Thank you! Yes! The Fishing Hut's defenses! *gets up and walks over to a stuffed fish mounted on the wall*

*presses the fish, and it swivels around to reveal a hidden control panel*

Aha! Now we're in business! Muahaha! *presses a red button on the control panel*

Nothing happens.

*mashes the button frantically* NOOOOO! The defenses aren't working!!

I wanna Darth Angler action figure... aaah, so tempting...

*drools*

(no! *slaps obi wan* snap out of it, man!)
(whut 'e saay?)
(shut up, hamish!)

But I wanna action figure!

((**slap**))

OUCH! OK, OK, I fight temptations... *clenches teeth*

  Comment From The Writer: My action figures are only for Dark Side members and people who are nice to me! So NYUH!!

*pauses for a long moment, and then smirks*

Hey, uh, Vida? GUESS WHAT??? No really, GUESS!! Heeeeheheheheh!!! *looks pointedly at her comment counter, grinning...*

[a wolf slightly larger than a shetland pony crashes in, already faintly pink and definitely crazed, still clad in what looks like a Klangon ammo belt. The mad crimson eyes sweep the scene. It leaps and siezes upon V-rod and a beanie animal at the same time, oblivious to the stinging static and the frantic cries of the Gang Who Say Ni. Beans and wisps of cloud scatter until one of the captured creatures stops moving, when, like a dog bored with a toy it lets both drop. There is no recognition nor 'higher intelligence' in the stare it gives the huddled combattants. A purely animal snarl grates out. It leaps for the humans and the Sith. Everyone scatters, the Angler ducks and ten stone of angry muscle hits the window of the hut. A shrapnel-burst of glass and it is gone, leaving only smears of its blood, singed fur and a mangled beanie toy. V-rod twitches near the floor. No-one speaks until

  Comment From The Writer: *straightens, her eyes wide* I go away for ONE DAY...

Grr... *takes out kit* *opens it up* *presses button* *needles fly out, thread themselves, and sew the beanies back up*

You didn't think I would leave them without a way to put them back together? Looks like it's time for a spell... *beanies become actual flesh and blood, instead of stuff animals* Sure, it'll wear off at midnight... but still...


Living Stuffed Animals: ni ni ni ni ni *gasp for air* ni ni ni ni ni ni ni ni ni ni ni ni ni ni ni ni ni ni ni ni ni ... *sound drowns out anything else*

Oh yeah. *smashes CD player*

Comment From The Writer: ... and look what happens!! GRRRR!! *switches on the radio and turns it up to full volume in an attempt to drown out the wretched 'ni's again...

*walks in*

What's that horrible noise?

(which noise? that ni ni ni?)

Yes! That noise! Uuurgh! It's driving me crazy!

But wait, that's a good thing... Oooh... *cackles evily*

Meeegaaan?

(mwahaha)

Oh, Meeegaaan?

(hahaha)

Ni ni ni ni ni ni ni ni ni ni ni ni ni ni ni ni ni ni ni ni ni ni *wheezes for breath* ni ni ni ni ni ni ni ni ni ni ni ni !!!!!!!!!!!

NIII!!!!!!!!!

*chokes a live cute fuzzy plush animal to death just for the fun of it*

Ni ni ni ni ni ni ....

  Comment From The Writer: AAAAARRRGGHH!! Dammit!!!

Ni ni ni ni ni ni ni ni...

Comment From The Writer: *flicks on her lightsabre and starts hacking desperately at the fuzzy animals...*

*twirls shadowstaff* *everything becomes very dark all of a sudden* *snickers* Ehehe, instant midnight. *watches beanies return to normal pathetic form* And now for these so-called knights of ni... IT IT IT IT IT IT IT IT IT IT IT IT IT IT IT IT IT IT IT IT IT IT IT IT IT IT IT IT IT IT IT IT IT IT IT IT IT IT IT IT IT IT IT IT IT IT IT IT!!!

  Comment From The Writer: *cheers* WHOOOOOHOOOO!!! YEAH!! Go Emberice!!!

AHH!!! NOOOO!!! That WORD!! It means utter disaster for all who say NI! *covers ears and cowers*

Time for drastic measures! *consults her Monty Python and the Holy Grail handbook* Ok. Ready!

One...
Two...
FIVE!!!

(Three, sir!)

THREE!!!!!

*HAAAALELUJAH!!*

*watches as Holy Hand Grenade blows Emberice into tiny bits*

*cackles and sneaks off, muttering 'ni' under her breath*

  Comment From The Writer: NOOOOOOOOO!!! *hurriedly gathers up the bits of Emberice* You shall not die, my loyal ally!!

*places the Sword of Healing on the pile of bits and watches as Emberice melts back together*

*covers ears* No! Not THAT word!

My beanies! *glares at Emberice* I hates him, yesh I does...

(I like him)

Traitor! You're a traitor for living inside my mind! *glares* If I lose my mind, you all die. *indicates other people type things in there* So HA!

CAPS LOCK MONSTER: I DON'T WANNA DIE!!!!

Well =P. *takes out whip* *begins severely punishing Caps and parentheses* I'll have them trained yet...


*narrows eyes* Operation ni may not have worked, but there are other operations that will, I tell you. You will die... good. *walks out, pieces of beanie cloth and plastic beans in her arms*

Come, Baisley. *Baisley the indestructable who loves night and can hear...that word...without dying, follows*

  Comment From The Writer: You're afraid of the word 'it'?? *shrugs* *yells at the top of her voice:*

IT IT IT IT IT IT IT IT IT IT IT IT IT IT!!!!

Oh yeah.

*takes out Gack Hack Foo that Obi Wan gave her* Here. *smirks, hands them to confused Angler* They're crossbreeds of various animals. Ain't they cute?

You're thirsty, you say? *hands Angler a glass of orange juice* *spills it* Oops. And it's all over the Gack Hack Foo, too. Obi Wan warned me not to spill that on them...

*leaves the room, while Angler tries to fight the breeding, horribly smelling, bad tempered Gack Hack Foo once they have been given orange juice*

  Comment From The Writer: What?? What the heck is Gack Hack Foo?? *hacks at the things with her lightsabre*

*watches Gack Hack Foo eat said lightsaber* *smiles*

It's your worst nightmare.

  Comment From The Writer: *stares in disbelief as the Gack Hack Foo eat her lightsabre*

Eeep.

*watches as Gack Hack Foo go rampant on Angler's page, gnawing at people's limbs with their razor-sharp teeth*

Adorable, innit?

... wait... I got a comment title? NO WAY!! Whoopie Goldberg! *evil grin* So, that means I can, like, ask for a story? Which comment number was it, by the way?

  Comment From The Writer: Yep, you got my 300th main page title, which means you are indeed entitled to a request story. Lucky you, eh?

BOOoooossssssshhhhhhhhhh!!!
[vibrations of gong cause Gack Hack Foo to keel over, ears bleeding. Angler goes cross-eyed] Uh, sorry. That didn't help anything much, did it? [shuffles off]

Comment From The Writer: *Angler clamps her hands over her ears as the fishing hut trembles and dust filters down from the ceiling*

Ugh... On th-the c-c-contrary, a-a-anything th-that h-hurts the G-Gack Hack F-Foo is a h-help...

Cecily is certainly proving useful, isn't she?
*smirks at Hanna Solo, who FAILED to convert pink lycanthorpe*
I think I can convince Bunto to join the dark side. You should come see his newly built gallery as well. Bear with me as I try to make a link:
Bunto and his, er, interesting drawings
I hope that worked. If not, could you fix it for me, and tell me what I did wrong? I really have to understand this HTML stuff...

Comment From The Writer: You ALMOST got it right! You just missed the = sign after the 'a href'. But no probs, I fixed it up for you.

*the Gack Hack Foo get up, since they are now deaf they can no longer hear the gong* I dunno why anyone would want to join you guys, you're so stupid. *is failing to think of a good unsult*

*sets loose the thousand of Gack Hack Foo, who- now deaf- attack Cecily and her gong, eat all the lightsabres, and bite off all of Angler's limbs*

Aren't they adorable?

  Comment From The Writer: *lies limbless on the floor in a rapidly expanding pool of blood* Y-yeah, th-they're j-just d-darling... *faints*

Oh yeah. And you're a wheezing old geezer. =P.

  Comment From Izzy: *takes the Sword of Lightning from its wrought-iron stand, floats up behind Hanna and slices her head off*

And Tim is dead. By the way.

Comment From The Writer: *is still unconscious on the floor, but she knows that Tim is dead, yes*

Werewolf annoyed at having deaf Gack Hack Foo set upon her. Very annoyed. Angry. [Falls to knees] No no no not again PLEASE! Argh! No...[Back arches like a scalded cat. Limbs twist as she tries to stop the change, sobbing with effort and gasping for breath through a ribcage trying to change shape.]Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgggggaaaaaaaarrrr[The tortured scream trails off into a long, rolling growl]A huge pale wolf stands among the clawing Gack Hack Foo, flanks heaving. Ignoring the Angler only because she is no longer moving the thing sets about the tiny creatures. A single snap of its massive jaws cuts two entirely in half. Blood splatters the walls until they run purple. It doesn't care about the injuries inflicted upon it. There is nothing in this beast but rage, and the killing instinct that will not stop until the anger leaves. The humans and the Sith back off, hoping that they'll be able to reach the door before it finishes shaking the life out of the last partially dismembered reptilian thing that a few seconds before had been beating up a nervous teenage girl over-enthusiastically happy to get her beloved gong back. It shakes the last couple of Gack Hack Foo to nastily dripping rags and advances upon the last moving objects in the room, paws the size of a woman's fist slipping in oddly-patterned entrails and the floor's coating of blood, recognising neither friend nor enemy, wanting only to kill...

  Comment From Izzy: *retreats to the safety of the ceiling, watching the werewolf and staring at the blood and various body parts scattered all over the hut*

Zzere izz goink to be vun hell ov a cleaning bill...

I'm dead?
Well that would explain why I could float through walls this morning.
Dammit, I can't be dead, I have school tommorrow! Oh wait...
It's alright, maybe i could get used to being a ghost.
*light shines from above*
Aw, I have to go to heaven? But I tried to be evil, I really did!
*Angel flies down and extends arm*

No, you'll never take me dead!

*Snatches a hook off table and impales it thorugh the angel's hand, then floats off speedily to haunt forkwalker*

Angel: Sonofa...
*speaks into walkie talkie*
"We got a situation down here. Someone running from eternal judgement. Male, with red skin, black stripes, and horns. Looking very pale. Send your best men down here to take care of it, over."
*rips hook out of hand, and tosses it to the floor carelessly, then smiles cruelly*
No one escapes the pearly gates!

Comment From The Writer: *the sound of the Angel's voice stirs the Angler into consciousness, and she lifts her head*

*her eyes are fierce* NO-ONE... takes... m-my... allies... away...

miscellanious bubs? *nods* yes! mangled stems!

and how be you? I be good! darth butt *many raising of eyebrows* in-ter-es-ting...

J'aime manger whiteboard marker! YUM!

*chomps walls* pretty!

Comment From The Writer: *blinks, trying to focus bleary eyes on Lee-Ann* I... b-be... not... so... g-good....Y-y-you... haven't... seen... m-my... l-limbs... around, by... any... ch-chance...?

insanity has no logic, neither does school

why? I shall ask.

Becuase! And we shall leave it at that *grins*

Comment From The Writer: ....ugh....

*begins to wish she was still unconscious*

*concentrates hard, trying to faint again, but fails*

*sighs*

Huge wolf snaps vaugely at Tim and is frustrated to find fangs pass straight through. Angelic being's noise on walkie-talkie irritates the animal. Ears back it leaps upon the bird-dude in the dress and despite his struggles tears his throat out. It then tries to kill the walkie-talkie, [**Bob?BOb? What the Heaven's going on down there?**]and having chewed that for a bit slinks out of the hut, hacking foam.

Comment From The Writer: *forgotten by everyone, the tiny Storm Unicorn, who has been watching the violent battle with great interest from beneath the coffee-table, now finds itself standing in a pool of various peoples/creatures' blood. It recalls the words of it's creator:*

"... leave it standing in water and it will grow..." *it wonders, with growing horror, what would happen if it were to stand in blood instead...*

*it doesn't wonder for long*

*it begins to grow...*

*Hears sounds of mauling, and peers into fishing hut eagerly*
Yay, you killed him! But there might be more...I gotta hide, at least until Emberice ressurects me!

Comment From The Writer: ... my head hurts... does anyone have any aspirin...?

*lays out her hand, grinning as the mimes groan* I kinda like being a ghost, actually. Now if you excuse me, I'm going to take the money I won from playing poker with Cecily's mimes, and I'm buying myslef a nice invisible dress.

...


That sounded soooo wrong.

The werewolf threw up the Gack Hack Foo in my wastebasket. Here. *dumps a mess of green bits and pieces onto the Angler's page* I think you'll enjoy this.

*the Angler is unable to clean well, as she has no limbs* Your lightsaber is in there, and your limbs, since the GHF ate them, then the werewolf ate the GHF... so maybe you can reattach them.

*smiles* You're the oldest, Angler, you geezer. *lightsaber passes through her body, since she's a ghost*

*smiles at the mess, then floats out*

Comment From The Writer: *ignoring Hanna, the Angler tries to sort out her limbs from the mess*

*half a dozen mimes come into the fishing hut and start dancing weirdly to horrible flute music*

Er... We-ell... I am freaked out. All that is missing now is a clown. *shudders*

*opens the door, and a thousand or so Gack Hack Foo hop into the room*

*spills 12 gallons of orange juice over the Gack Hack Foo, and they become evil reptilian mutants and start ransacking the place once more*

They're new and improved. And gongs can't hurt them.

Think Gizmo and Gremlins ... multiplied by 100000.

Brought to you by Archie the Little Turkish Salesman Inc. and Obi Wan's Mutant Workshop.

Comment From The Writer: *oblivious to the horrible flute music and fresh wave of GHF, she picks up an arm and tries to stick it back into place*

*stares at the arm, which doesn't seem to look right* Wait... I don't think this one's mine... *tosses it into the horde of hungry GHF*

Mimes quietly, peacefully convince Gack Hack Foo that the invisible walls are real. Three faintly smiling mimes silently 'push'at the 'sides' of their 'box' until the GHF are compressed into a wriggling cube, allowing the mimes to place a white throw over them and set about redecorating the Angler's hut. In white. The various bits of Angler they sculpt into an invisible ostritch-shaped thing, which they proceed to pen in with invisible walls, smiling faintly and Frenchly the while. This done the mimes, now more in number as silent street performers have a weird magnetisim, settle down to staring at walls to Musak and drinking tobasco on ice and standing still and other mime things.

Comment From The Writer: *the hut quivers*

*a mass of glowing, blood-red storm clouds seethes in the centre of the room, emitting bolts of lightning...*

THOOOOOR AAAANGRRRRYYYY!!

THOOOOR NOOO LIIIKE GAAAACK HAAAACK FOOOO!!

*an enormous red unicorn with a six-foot-long silver horn and glowing red eyes stands in the middle of the room, glaring ferociously*

*Thor brings one of his massive hooves down on the cube of compressed Gack Hack Foo, turning them into Gack Hack Goo and leaving quite a large crater in the floor*

*the mimes go even paler, drop their invisible cards and drinks, and flee*

*the spell is broken, and the bits of Darth Angler drop to the floor, where they reatttach themselves to her body*

*Darth Angler stands up, whole once more, brushing blood and slime half-heartedly off her sleeve. She surveys the disgusting mess all over her hut, and her eyes narrow*

Thor?

YEEEEEESSS MIIISSSSTRESSSS?

Go and kill Obi Wan Cookie.

YEEEEEESSS MIIISSSSTRESSSS.

*with a thundering neigh, the gigantic unicorn charges off, demolishing a large part of the wall in the process*

*Fingers the shortbread, as if expecting it to flinch.* Hehehe! Man, this is definately one of my favorite corners of the woods. I feel as if i should break into some elaborate song about Elfwood, but the last time I tried to pull something like that I was dragged out of the scene by a cop and a paramedic who insisted that I spend a night at the hospital just so they can make sure I dont suffer from delusions. So, for the sake of avoiding the re-living of my boss' retirement party all over again, I won't. But anyways, i make frequent visits here, just to catch up with Ferrian's Winter and any new poems/stories you may have cooked up! Great job with this little treasure trove hidden cleverly in the wood. Keep it up!
~Panda Smasher

  Comment From The Writer: Thank you very much!

[mimes creep back in. Some come out from under the fridge. The rod cupboard rattles. The Angler opens the door and finds herself meeting the blank, faintly smiling stares of another two. She shuts the door.]

  Comment From The Writer: *shivers*

Hmm. Well, at least if you mime cleaning up they'll probably copy you. I'm working on a mime-repellant. But if you're in a gloating mood I think your rival got on the wrong side of them by torching some...

  Comment From The Writer: *smirks* Oh dear, did she? Tsk, tsk. Oh, I don't mind the mimes... Well, alright, they ARE a bit creepy. But they didn't try to hurt me, and they wall my enemies up in invisible boxes. As long as they don't make me into an ostrich again, I could live with them.

*arrives from Beth's page dragging unconcious mimes, splattered with rotten eggs* 'Ere. Enjoyb. *watches with happiness as Darth Angler and evil comrades start laughing at the noseplug and how it makes her voice sound, suddenly stop with surprise, and then faint from the stench* KAGS? *laughs as the rest of the KAGS swoop down and attack the evil side with varying degrees of violence* Too bad, Darth Angler. You tried. Just not hard enough. *cackles evilly*

Comment From The Writer: *up near the ceiling, Izzy mimes spraying a can of air freshener*

*the mimes copy her, and the stench quickly fades away*

*Darth Angler picks herself up from the floor, and smiles pleasantly at Kellidala* I tried? Hahaha, I'm just getting started! You're just lucky that Thor is out killing Cookie at the moment. *smirks* *pretends to throw a fishhook at Kelly*

*to Kelly's horror, the mimes all copy her*

*Darth Angler watches in amusement as Kelly falls to the floor, stuck with invisible fishhooks*

Ahem, Kellidala, It would appear that Solo is on vacation, and Forkwalker and Cookie had an unfortunate accident today in Beth's pit of darkness. Shame that, but it looks like you're all alone.
*draws lightsaber, and eagerly advances towards the angled member of KAGS*

  Comment From The Writer: Muahahaha!!

[mimes copy the movement, staring blank-eyed, smiling stares]

Comment From The Writer: *stands back to watch*

*spins staff, creating a whirling vortex of dark energies* *a little puffball pops out, and transforms into a small white rabbit* *mimes copy the action* *Vorpal Bunny tears Kelly's throat out, as do the other invisible ones* There we go...*places Vorpal Bunny near the door* Hehehe... any KAGS members that try to come in here are going to have the same thing happen.... *glances at gaping hole in the other wall* Well, maybe not.

But still, if they get anywhere near it....Oh, and don't antagonize it, or it'll do the same to you. It's currently against the KAGS because it hates Gack Hack Foo/Goo, but it's kinda.... not very loyal. Still, as long as you leave it alone, it'll stay on our side. And it's only weakness is the Holy Hand Grenade, but Beth already used that one.

Muahahahahaha......

  Comment From The Writer: YAY!! Vorpal Bunny!! Awwwww, isn't he cuuuute.... *goes to pat the bunny, then leaps backwards hastily as it springs at her*

Eh. I think I'll just leave it alone there by the door... *edges away until she has the couch between herself and the bunny*

*lies writhing on the floor, prickled with fishooks* Damn. Was it the gloating that did me in? *carefully pries the hooks out of her skin, and picks herself up off the ground* *sees a bundle of white snarling fun flying at her throat* RUN AWAY! RUN AWAY! *there's no backup to follow her orders* Shoot. *dies*

*the ghost of Kellidala rises out of her mauled body, oblivious to the rabid rabbit's new attempts at taking her ghostly throat out* I was wondering when it would be my turn to experience death...*shrugs* Oh well, at least I can't be harmed now...I think...*eyes dart around frantically*

Hmmm...I can't touch live things...*ponders* but...I CAN still talk...and haunt! I shall now proceed to haunt you in the worst possible way, and resort back to the original attack...*nods happily* Ready? Steady? GO!

Nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnni! Ni ni ni ni ni!!! *Hanna's Les Minions, who did NOT accompany her on her holiday, appear as a result of the call of the ni, and join in the attack* *a whole chorus of high, squeaky, but oddly creepy voices "ni" at Darth Angler and the revived Tim Maul* NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!!!

Comment From The Writer: *groans* *clamps her hands over her ears* Not again....

*raises double ended lightsaber and swings it through Kellidala's ghost*
Uh oh.
*notices horrible ni noise, and runs off grumbling, deciding to check on the fork master's page*
You'd better not follow me, you ghostial types you.
*grumblegrumblegrumblegrumble*

  Comment From The Writer: WAIT!! Where are you going??? Don't leave me here alone with ni-ing critters and ghosts!!

*drags self to page, clutching painfully at bleeding stomach*

Urgh... I hate you so bad.

I wanna story... I wanna space opera! Yes! Bwahaha! Think Star Trek, Futurama, and similar. Funny, with a neurotic short captain, a sexy doctor, aaaand... I dunno. A hillarious space opera. You can do it, right?

  Comment From The Writer: Hmmm... well, it will be a challenge, but I'll try. I'm not used to writing humourous stories, I usually leave that to people who are actually good at it, like, well... *cough* you. But I'll see what I can do.

*the Vorpal Bunny leaps at Vida and gnaws her arm off*

[mimes create invisible wall between themselves, the ghost and the rabbit. This done they stand still, smiling and staring and never saying anything at all.]

Comment From The Writer: ....

*walks through the mimes' wall* Really, being dead has it's advantages...

Comment From The Writer:

I know, doesn't it? AND, we can FLY. Haha. Well, float. Whatever.

*floats up towards Megan's neatly organized stories*

*accompanied by a cold, howling wind, Beth swoops down on the loose pieces of parchment, blowing them all over the room*

*cackles with glee and does it again and again, until all Megan's story pages have been mixed up and scattered to distant places*

  Comment From The Writer: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! *frantically tries to clutch at the papers flying all over the room* MY PRECIOUS STORIES!! DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY PAGES OF FW THERE ARE??? *glares furiously*

Beth!! Are you purposely TRYING to delay FW?

Comment From The Writer: *sobs* I'll NEVER find my half-finished chapter 24 and half-finished Merc III in this mess! IT'S HOPELESS!! FW WILL BE DELAYED FOREVER...!!!

[mimes in good mood mime perfect books. Pages order themselves out of sheer embarrasment] There you go. Now you only have to get the books off the mimes. Somehow. Er... in the words of the great master: "patient you must be."

Comment From The Writer: *looks at the eerie, smiling faces of the mimes, holding her stories*

Er... this could be tricky...

Oh, I almost forgot! You are the winner of the 600th overall comment title!!

Gah, I guess this means ANOTHER request...

*gasps*!! So... many... Mod's... Choices!!! NO FAIR!

  Comment From The Writer: Sorry! I didn't MEAN to get so many... People just seem to like my stories! Lol, welcome to my hut! Feel free to look around, and don't mind the mimes and dismembered limbs and ghosts and savage rabbits and whatnot. There's a war going on at the moment...

It don't need to be funny, on the other hand. It can have an ironic/sarcastic character, but it needn't be funny.

Oh, and about that...

*by using Frookie regrows arm, grabs Wossname Rabbit by its throat and breaks it*

Comment From The Writer: It doesn't have to be funny? *breathes a sigh of relief* Oh, that's good.

*smirks as Vida kills the bunny* You know, I was expecting you to do that. Because now, you see, I have the GHOST of a Vorpal Bunny. *cackles*

You need New Recruits don't you?
Tell me...what advantages might..uhh..what advantages will I receive...(I cant make that sound smarter can I?) Oh well...whatever it is just give it to me and im yours...well your groups..whatever just call me evil.

Comment From The Writer: Well, you'll get a link in my bio, and get to kill/torture the KAGS in humourous ways...

Yes, Matt has finally come to his senses. Do let him join, Megan, he's ever so sadistic and evil. Plus, he killed Hanna Solo again. Hehehe, now all of the KAGS but Simi are ghosts...I think it's time I paid a visit to Miss Chewie Muffin...

Comment From The Writer: Did he? Heheheh...

Tim is right. I join. Being evil is ever so much fun. Being a good one who showers muffins and destroys evil...isnt fun. Lemme in.

Comment From The Writer: Well... Alright, sure, why not. Allies are allies... Welcome to the Dark Side!

Ya tim got me to join too so how about it i can change into a dragon at any time thats good and i like to eat the undead

  Comment From The Writer: Ooooooh, excellent! You're in! *shakes your hand formally* Welcome to the Dark Side!

Ah... excuse me??? *folds her ghostly arms and sniffs disdainfully*

You callin' us the GOOD side again? When will you people learn... THERE IS NO GOOD SIDE!!! Just two evil sides. Bwahaha!! We are the Moderately Burnt Side of Frookie.

Besides, how can you call a group who is dedicated to assassinating part of the Elfyland GOOD????

*storms away, ranting loudly*

  Comment From The Writer: *the Ghost of the Vorpal Bunny leaps at Beth's unprotected back...*

["Bill" and "Ted" wander in, grin maniacally until other mimes become freaked out and hide in the Angler's cupboards and head off in the direction of Cookie's page]

Comment From The Writer: *raises an eyebrow curiously*

*dumps water on Baisley* *baisley grows in size until he is a giant ram the size of an elephant*

I will get you. *kills Baisley...temporarily*

Baisley the Ghost: *attacks Ghost of the Vorpal Bunny before it can get Beth's back* *rips bunny to pieces*

Good ghosty. Now back to the world of the living. *presses giant button on wall, and Baisley returns to his normal, living, one half foot tall self*

Baisley: Bahh... *smacks lips* (Translation: That was some good ghost bunny.)

Oh- Bunto didn't succeed in killing me. He just stuck a knife in my back or something. It itches some, but that's all. I took it out and killed him good. He's a ghost now.

Comment From The Writer: *Baisley immediately suffers from an extremely bad case of indigestion*

*Baisely runs into the hut, fleeing from his murderous mistress who plans to eat him(I wonder who told him that?)*

*Tim Maul lies in wait, then pounces suddenly on unsuspecting ram*

*various sounds of mauling*

It won't be long, Megan, I've just got to get this spit going. Do you want your mutton medium, rare, or well done?

And it appears the dark side is growing *grins*
Why, do we possible have more numbers now?
KAGS:
Chewie Muffin
Hanna Solo
Kellidala
Cookie Obi Wan
Forkwalker

Dark Side:
The Angler
Emberice
Tim Maul
Bunto The Hut
Toast(we really need to think up a nickname for her!)

Wow, it's even sided. Now how will the KAGS win if they can't fight dirty?

  Comment From The Writer: Hahaha! Extra well done, please. Positively charcoal. Yes, indeed, now the playing field is much more even. Hmmm... I can't think of any suitable Star Wars nicknames at the moment... unless she wants to be Darth Toast. Or maybe she could be Burnt Toast...

Go ahead and take that Baisley- I was ready for a new model anyway.

Introducing- Baisley Version 2.0! Now equipped with a maul-proof hide. Beware; eating him may result in sudden sickness and/or fatality, not to mention a ram charging out of your stomach and then reassembling himself.

He's also impervious to nursery rhymes. And he is now equipped with torpedoes, and rocket launchers. Go ahead and try to kill or scare this one; it will be amusing. I'll enjoy the look in your eyes when I make a new model.

Baisley: I agree with her; try to eat me. I'll enjoy eating my way out from inside your stomach.

(Baisley 2.0, now with complete English Dictionary! No translator required.)

Sheep to English Translator: Aw, man!

Comment From The Writer: *leans against her spear and smirks at the ram* My, my, torpedoes and rocket launchers. How impressive.

*raps Baisley 2.0 on the top of the head with the butt of her spear, and watches him topple over with the weight of all that equipment*

*sidesteps a couple of rockets and pulls something out of her pocket, which looks like a chocolate koala*

*tosses the chocolate koala at Baisley. It explodes on impact and covers the ram in a sticky, gooey caramel that jams his weapons and sticks him fast to the floor*

Exploding Caramello Koala, new from Angler Inc. That caramel is the stickiest stuff ever invented. Once stuck to something, it cannot be destroyed or removed. Not even by Frookie, magic or Big Kev's cleaning products. Try to remove it, or destroy it, and it will simply stick harder. He could TRY to eat it off... if he wants to fuse his jaws together permanently, that is.

*smiles cheerfully* Pretty neat, huh?

Guess who snagged 200th overall comment on Cookie's page? Come on, you know you wanna.

That same person has the most amount of comment titles from Cookie. Bwahahahaha... I am the master!

^_^

*does the 'in your face' dance*

  Comment From The Writer: *does the 'I Just Stuck Your Ram Permanently To My Floor With An Exploding Chocolate Koala' dance*

Besides, I can't keep track of comment titles on EVERYONE'S pages. So, good for you.

*Big Kev walks in, sees massive mess*

Big Kev: I'm excited!

*Takes out one of his many chemical cleaning agents that all suspiciously are made from the same ingredients, and begins to scrub*

*Unfortunately Baisley 2.0 begins to feel the effects of the powerful base and begins to have his hide melted off*

*river of melted hide flows towards dancing Hanna, forming a pool about her feet*

*melted hide soon dries, leaving Hanna's feet glued to the ground*

Big Kev: Aha, another challenge!

*turns to clean the mess at Hanna's feet, but his gut accidentally knocks a shelf, on which happens to rest another exploding caramello koala*

*you can guess where this is heading*

Oh my god, there's so much to clean here, that Big Kev had a heart attack. Hmm, I guess he got too excited.

*takes a normal Caramello Koala from the fridge*

Mmm, these are really good Hanna!

  Comment From The Writer: *is... laughing... so... hard... she... can... barely... sit... up... straight...*

*coughcough*

Am not a ghost. *smacks Maul with Hello Kitty umbrella - it hurts both his head AND his pride, haha*

I am perfectly solid, thank you. Pfft. You people... wishful thinking.

Comment From The Writer: *recovers with an effort from the previous comment* So you're still solid, eh? *grins* Are you sure? *stabs Cookie with her spear, watching the blood pour out* Oh yes, so you are. Well, we can't have that, can we, hmmm? *takes another chocolate from her pocket-- this one a Peppermint Freddo*

*throws the Freddo at Cookie, which explodes, covering her with acid-like sticky peppermint*

*watches as Cookie melts through the floorboards, through the earth's crust and deep into the mantle, whereupon she is engulfed in molten lava and burnt into nothing*

*Rolls eyes* Guys, I am the Queen of Cleaning. You do not know gross until you've cleaned out a miniature refrigerator that has cat hair in it and hasn't been cleaned for more than two and a half years.

Don't ask. Just... don't ask. We'll say that my brother is nasty, and leave it at that.

*reaches over with rags and cleans fake Baisley flesh from her feet in an OC fashion*

That wasn't the real Baisley, you know.

*smirks* What, so you both fell for my decoys? You thought that was an actual threat? Get real. Baisley is with me, sitting by my computer, licking his fur... he's weird. And by the way, Megan, he's only one foot tall. You should've known that Baisley 2.0 was a decoy when you saw how big it was. He'll never fall for your tricks.

Baisley: Bah bahh, bahh bah. (Translation: For once, I agree with the imbecile.)

You can tell me that you killed Baisley... but I can show you photographic proof that he's still alive. I even have a picture of him in the mountains of Colorado, in the snow. You think I jest. There is no jesting here.

BTW... after I do a few things, Megan, your request is next. Expect it in two or three more tickets.

*Baisley has an iron stomach, and soon enough the ghost bunny is safely deposited in the ram litter box*

Comment From The Writer: Decoys? Sure, sure, we all believe you, Hanna. *shakes her head in mock-pity, and turns to Tim* I think she's in denial, poor dear. Maybe she needs therapy?

*turns back to Hanna and smirks* Oh, and by the way... you're still covered with caramello, and NO AMOUNT of cleaning will get rid of it. *gestures at the body of Big Kev on the floor* Even HE couldn't get rid of it. *gives you a 'I rest my case' look*

But, since I'm feeling generous today, and since it would be rather tiresome having you stuck to my floor for all eternity, I will release you. Unfortunately, the only way to do that is to kill you. So-- *throws a Peppermint Freddo at Hanna, and watches as she melts through the floorboards, through the earth's crust, into molten lava and is burnt to nothing*

*shouts down the hole: AND BAISLEY IS DEAD! HAHAHAHA!!*

Oh Hanna, on your way down to the earth's liquid iron core you should call in to hell. I was reading evil monthly the other day and it had a really good article on some of the counselling services available in hell. They can do wonders for denial! Just ask the hundreds of thousands of tormented souls who have finally accepted their fate.

*crosses arms in classic "Jack McCoy" pose, and also rests his case*

Birthday sprite:What case?

Shutup you.

Comment From The Writer:

Oh, in case you're wondering what he's doing here-
*jerks thumb towards above comment*
-he's been hanging around Charly Strawberry's page today, trying to bask in her birthday glory. Come say happy birthday to her!

http://elfwood.lysator.liu.se/libr/c/h/charleo/?_=1091596773

I didn't link it because Hanna told me not to use HTML in comments *sulks*

Come now, and you can have some of the Pavlova cake I forced my gnomes into making her!

Comment From The Writer: *pats Tim on the shoulder* You can use html on my page if you like, because I'm generous and don't mind fixing it up for you. Besides, everyone else does... *coughs and points to Vida's comment below*. Oh, and I made it into a link anyway.

Mmmmmm, Pavlova!! I'll be there!

Flying over it all wachting like a movie or som thing

*yawns*

flys over to the ram and lands by tim

*talks in his head*

a ram that is so lame im mean come on that almost gay

can i eat her angler oh and i kinda like burnt toats but still thinken

  Comment From The Writer: *pokes toast* Hey, I've got a ram too, you know. But that's okay, I forgive you. *coughmine'sbetteranywaycough*

You can eat anything you like, as long as it's an enemy. Hmmm, you wouldn't mind getting rid of those draclet things down there, would you?

Ha

ha

i

spelt

my

name

wrong

toast

toast

not toats

thats just weird

oh angler thanx for letting me join

  Comment From The Writer: LOL! No worries!

Hmmm...even, eh? Can't play dirty, eh? Ah, well, you will see...you will see...

Comment From The Writer: *fingers another Exploding Caramello Koala...*

LOL! Just found a PERFECT reference of what the Gack Hack Foo might look like if they were only cat-like!

http://elfwood.lysator.liu.se/art/c/s/cshayden/cuddles.jpg.html

Go see! Go! Go! Go! Before you get eaten by the creepy draclets!

(you ask yourself... what are creepy draclets?)
(trust me, you don't wanna know)

*a draclet hopps in, and hopps around you*

Creepy Draclet #1: Mwher! Squelch! Mwher!

(think... a bean bag-sized magenta coloured fat scaly insect with six legs and three eyes)
(oh, and don't forget the tiny teeth which can eat a wagon of nuclear waste and be unharmed)
(oh yeah... and the long rat-like tail with a poisoned morningstar on the end)
(yeah. ahaha... creepy, innit?)

Creepy Draclet #2: Mwher! Squelch! Mwher!
Creepy Draclet #3: Mwher! Squelch! Mwher!
Creepy Draclet #4: Mwher! Squelch! Mwher!

Oh, I forgot. They multiply. Just like that. Plop, plop, plopadee plop-plopping all around the place. Like amoeba cloning, only faster and more efficient. Ha ha ha.
Creepy Draclet #5: Mwher! Squelch! Mwher!

  Comment From The Writer: *sigh* *uses the body of Big Kev as a shield*

Yummy

draclets

i

eat

  Comment From The Writer: YAY!! *starts up a chant: Eat! Eat! Eat! Eat!*

mwher!

squelch!

mwher!

{translation according to Concise Draclet Dictionary Of Phrases And Slang 2006:

"mmm

toast

wanna eat NOW!"

*draclet hopps around toast and nibbles at its crust*

  Comment From The Writer: *thwacks the draclet on the head with her spear*

Thanks for the bday message Megan

*hands you a giant slice of Pavlova in the shape of Bethany's head*

Eat up!

  Comment From The Writer: No problem! Pavlova!! YUMMY!! And in the shape of my mortal enemy, too! *stabs a knife happily into its strawberry eye*

Im back megan stupid draclets im not really toats im a human see *poits to her nose the draclets stare *

get out of here*makeing them all run away*

ya im back oh ya no how thay have gack hack foo
thess guys
well i was thinking bush hack foo thay can kill

  Comment From The Writer: Yay! Toast is back!

No complaints from me. They can eat our Prime Minister too, while they're at it.

Updated. First chapter of a new story. Kinda short though....couldn't find another good place to end it. Ah well.

  Comment From The Writer: Be there I shall!

OMG! This war you've got going on is totally hilarious!!! *raises fist in triumph* JOIN YOUR SIDE I SHALL!!! Er...heh...sorry, Simi...O__O

  Comment From The Writer: WHOOOHOOOO!! ALRIGHT!! *hands you honourary Darth Angler action figure, free t-shirt and glow in the dark plush hook* Welcome -KKKEERR-SSHHHH- to the Dark Side!

Yes! Our ranks are steadily growing... The KAGS will never overcome the power of the Dark Side! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

*pouts* This ain't fair. And Obi-Wan has gone on holiday as well. *floats off, muttering heatedly under her breath*

  Comment From The Writer: Fair?? If I remember correctly, not so long ago the odds were stacked considerably against ME. Not so fun when the shoe's on the other foot, is it, hmmm? *smirks*

Pfft, whatya mean not fair? I didn't hear ya complainin' when you got Hanna and Simi! Typical goody goodies! You gonna dob on us now? :P

And yes our prime minister must be killed. No, Mr. Howard, those children were not thrown overboard!(crazy Aussie thing, you don't wanna get involved).


THE OLYMPICS ARE ALMOST HERE!!! I think I'd best talk to Lee-ann. With a bit of luck she'll be so caught up in the olympic fervour she'll join us. Then the odds are starting to build up against the KAGS, hehehe...

Comment From The Writer: Hear, hear, Tim. Gah, don't get me started on Mr. Howard. Pathetic, lying, infuriating little... GRRRR!! I despise politicians so much.

I KNOW!!! WHOOHOOO!! You know, I never used to like sports that much... until the Sydney Olympics, when I found myself watching all sorts of obscure sports, and getting excited when we won things like water polo.... Ah, I hope Athens are going to be as awesome as the last Olympics. AUSSIE AUSSIE AUSSIE! OI OI OI!!

So...why have I joined the Dark Side, you ask? Three words:

I

like

bean dip O__o

Oh, wait -- that's four words. Yay plusie fishing hook! I shall call him Squishy. O__o

Sincerely, T.T. "Luke Skywalker Smells" Dorionne

My final words / thoughts of the day: Obi Wan wears a dress! Jar-Jar Binks is a Lesbian! R2-D2 burned my toast! Lousy toaster. *grumble* *grumble*

DACKERY: O__O Jar-Jar Binks is a male...AND R2-D2 IS NOT A TOASTER!

TT: ...O_O...o_O...O_o...OoO SHOWS HOW MUCH YOU KNOW! I LIKE NACHO HATS!

Comment From The Writer: *shrugs* *hands you a tub of bean dip that is so big you stumble and fall face forward into it* Enjoy.

Megan, I think we should revive Forkwalker. Don't worry, I'm not being mind controlled by the KAGS! At least, I don't think...*spins around frantically to check the back of his head*
Oooh, dizzy... Anyways, it's just no fun if you can't maim and maul the leader of your sworn enemies, is it?

  Comment From The Writer: *stares at you for a long moment*

REVIVE her??

Are you SURE you're not being mind-controlled? *hastily makes a hat out of tin foil and places it on your head*

Well... I suppose... *taps her chin thoughtfully* You may have a point. Maybe we could revive her, and then lock her up in a cage or something, where we can torture her at will? Muahaha...

All right you have good stuff here. I really liked your poems, Mystical Mythical is really good.

I must join the dark side *begs* your pitch was really good.*nods* Must have Darth Angler action figure.

  Comment From The Writer: I... I... I... don't believe it... *hands you a Darth Angler action figure with a somewhat dazed expression on her face*

Thank you! And... welcome to the Dark Side!

*is still shocked*

He heee HEEE! I'm the one who recommended Abby join! Just so you know. Oh, and YYYYYyyyyyyyaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaYYYYYYYYYYyyyyyy bean dip!!!

  Comment From The Writer: THANK YOU!!!

["Ted" staggers on, loops in a circle and staggers off again, grinning maniacally. After a while "Bill" wanders in, seemingly looking for "Ted". After grinning maniacally and silently at Angler's new friends for a bit he seems to remember something about a queue on the village computer in france and mimes a werewolf doing big kitten eyes to know if the request-via-punk-mimes has been taken up. In flo-mo. He then does a vertical bodywave in a moment of randomness, mimes a very fast guitar riff and wanders off in search of "Ted".]

  Comment From The Writer: Yes indeed, I will do the werewolf's request... she wanted me to draw one of her characters, right? I just haven't gotten around to reading her stories yet, but I will, I promise.

Another one? Wow, we sure are growing, ain't we?

I know! Hows about instead of reviving her, we trash her library! And then we roll her up in a carpet and throw her off a bridge!

...Ok, so no carpet will hold a ghost. But why don't we attack the LIVING members of KAGS? Like Chewie Muffin, for instance. Then, when she least suspects it, we roll her up in a carpet and throw her off a bridge! AHAHAHAHAHA!

Go Thorpie! Good on ya Grant! Next time!

  Comment From The Writer: It looks as though Chewie Muffin is the only one we CAN attack... Kellidala is leaving for a few weeks...

Yay! Thorpie rules!!! Although, it would have been nice to see Grant win one for once, but oh well. And the 400m relay was a bit disappointing, considering how well they did last time, but oh well. We can't win 'em all, can we?